Jessica's Rose Garden

[Donica]

No one knows you like your electrolysis. I use Emla for my face. I got the prescription from my PCP. When I start removal in the Netherlands, I'm going to ask for a prescription for BLT. I usually do two hour sessions, once a week. I want to start doing 4 hours at 2 sessions per week, especially when she starts working on the south pole. I can't imagine doing more than 2 hours at a time because the numbing cream doesn't last that long. I want to be ready for GCS before this December.

[Jessica_Rose]

That sounds like a good plan Donica! The BLT cream does start to work quickly, although it may take an hour or so to become fully effective. You do get used to the pain, or maybe your nerves just give up trying to tell you that it hurts.

I realize that I had not mentioned my brother lately. Carl is back at the nursing home and seems to be stable, but he has now been diagnosed with Parkinson's in addition to cancer. He also can't get out of bed without assistance. He mentioned to my dad that he feels as though he is slowly slipping away.

Today I attended a women-only concealed carry class. I currently have a permit, but it is in my dead name and I just thought it would be better to start fresh. The class went very well. At one point we were practicing how to grip our firearms, and the instructor made a comment about how long my fingers are. Another time she asked a little more about my background because I seemed more familiar with firearms than everyone else. I did listen to her, and I did learn a few things.

The class included an hour of range time, so I took both my Sig P938 and Springfield XDs 45. Both are small enough for concealed carry, but I had never fired either one. Looking at my targets a few people said I could shoot them both very well. I seemed to be a bit more accurate with the XDs, but the P938 was way more comfortable to fire.

After the class I talked to the instructor a bit, and told her the rest of the story. She mentioned that after the Parkland shooting the range teamed up with some local churches and the LGBT community and provided the class free to about 750 people. They also provided loaner handguns and ammo for training. They offer several other courses, and I may take a few more of them. Like condoms, a girl can't be too careful!

[Donica]

I have to settle for pepper spray and a taser. It's next to impossible to get a carry conceal permit in SoCal. They won't even let us have the more potent and larger cans of pepper spray.

[ChrissyRyan]

That sounds like a good plan Donica! The BLT cream does start to work quickly, although it may take an hour or so to become fully effective. You do get used to the pain, or maybe your nerves just give up trying to tell you that it hurts.

I realize that I had not mentioned my brother lately. Carl is back at the nursing home and seems to be stable, but he has now been diagnosed with Parkinson's in addition to cancer. He also can't get out of bed without assistance. He mentioned to my dad that he feels as though he is slowly slipping away.

Today I attended a women-only concealed carry class. I currently have a permit, but it is in my dead name and I just thought it would be better to start fresh. The class went very well. At one point we were practicing how to grip our firearms, and the instructor made a comment about how long my fingers are. Another time she asked a little more about my background because I seemed more familiar with firearms than everyone else. I did listen to her, and I did learn a few things.

The class included an hour of range time, so I took both my Sig P938 and Springfield XDs 45. Both are small enough for concealed carry, but I had never fired either one. Looking at my targets a few people said I could shoot them both very well. I seemed to be a bit more accurate with the XDs, but the P938 was way more comfortable to fire.

After the class I talked to the instructor a bit, and told her the rest of the story. She mentioned that after the Parkland shooting the range teamed up with some local churches and the LGBT community and provided the class free to about 750 people. They also provided loaner handguns and ammo for training. They offer several other courses, and I may take a few more of them. Like condoms, a girl can't be too careful!

Being trained on weapons you might use and self defense is wise.

Chrissy

[Jessica_Rose]

My therapist never seems to have any sense of urgency. Despite her promises she did not finish my letter today, I'm hopeful I will get it tomorrow. I wonder if she realizes how much stress and anxiety she is causing!

I now have appointments with two other therapists for the 'second' letter. I know I only need one 'second' letter, but since I don't know if I can truly count on these folks I want to cover my bases. The first appointment in on 15 Jan, and she 'might' be able to have the letter done by early February -- it is due by 7 Feb. The second appointment is on 22 Jan, and she claims the letter will be ready on 24 Jan.

This is really stressing me out!!!

Update (20 minutes after my original post): My therapist just came through!!! I now have my first letter, and she is faxing it to Dr. Ley's office right now. What a difference a few minutes can make in my mood! Now I'm crying tears of joy!!!

[ChrissyRyan]

My therapist never seems to have any sense of urgency. Despite her promises she did not finish my letter today, I'm hopeful I will get it tomorrow. I wonder if she realizes how much stress and anxiety she is causing!

I now have appointments with two other therapists for the 'second' letter. I know I only need one 'second' letter, but since I don't know if I can truly count on these folks I want to cover my bases. The first appointment in on 15 Jan, and she 'might' be able to have the letter done by early February -- it is due by 7 Feb. The second appointment is on 22 Jan, and she claims the letter will be ready on 24 Jan.

This is really stressing me out!!!

Update (20 minutes after my original post): My therapist just came through!!! I now have my first letter, and she is faxing it to Dr. Ley's office right now. What a difference a few minutes can make in my mood! Now I'm crying tears of joy!!!

Jessica Rose,

I am glad that the first letter came through.   

Chrissy

[KathyLauren]

I am glad you got your first letter.  That's a good idea to have multiple options for the second letter.

I know all about the frustration of therapists not having a sense of urgency.  The psychiatrist I saw for my second letter took two months to write it, and that was only with me bugging her secretary every two weeks.  I hope yours goes better than that!

[steph2.0]

I am glad you got your first letter.  That's a good idea to have multiple options for the second letter.

I know all about the frustration of therapists not having a sense of urgency.  The psychiatrist I saw for my second letter took two months to write it, and that was only with me bugging her secretary every two weeks.  I hope yours goes better than that!

Isn't it strange that trained therapists seem to be among the professionals most oblivious to the anxiety they're inflicting? Things that make you go "hmmmm."

Stephanie

[Donica]

For sure Stephanie! I don't understand why it has to take so long to write the letters in the first place? I know everyone is very busy but how long are the letters anyway? Are they multi page?

[steph2.0]

For sure Stephanie! I don't understand why it has to take so long to write the letters in the first place? I know everyone is very busy but how long are the letters anyway? Are they multi page?

I've gotten three different ones so far. One was very personalized and went on for two pages. It was also so darn flattering that I'm tempted to frame it. It was written by the psychiatrist at Mt. Sinai when I went for interviews when I was considering going there for GCS with Dr. Ting. The other two were written by the therapist and doctor at the Clinic in Orlando I had been going to, and were pretty much form letters. Boilerplates like that just need the date and a few other details changed, then an ink signature. They should be in and out in days.

Unfortunately, due to my insurance company's requirement that all letters have to be dated within 90 days of surgery, all those letters are useless to me, and I'll have to get them rewritten by my new therapist and another one also working in his office.

Stephanie

[Jessica_Rose]

Isn't it strange that trained therapists seem to be among the professionals most oblivious to the anxiety they're inflicting? Things that make you go "hmmmm."

Stephanie

Maybe they want to cause stress so we will book another appointment soon!

I contacted Dr. Ley's office about the timing of the second letter, and they don't allow much flexibility. I have sent notes to three other therapists in my area, and one long distance, to see if any of them can help. I would rather have too many letters than none.

[Northern Star Girl]

Maybe they want to cause stress so we will book another appointment soon!

I contacted Dr. Ley's office about the timing of the second letter, and they don't allow much flexibility. I have sent notes to three other therapists in my area, and one long distance, to see if any of them can help. I would rather have too many letters than none.

@Jessica_Rose
Yes indeed, too many letters is much better than none... good luck to you in getting everything in order.   The good news is you still have some time for the mail to come through... and of course there is always e-fax available.

.. please keep us all tuned in to your progress with this.
Hugs and wishing you well.
Danielle

[ChrissyRyan]

Maybe they want to cause stress so we will book another appointment soon!

I contacted Dr. Ley's office about the timing of the second letter, and they don't allow much flexibility. I have sent notes to three other therapists in my area, and one long distance, to see if any of them can help. I would rather have too many letters than none.

Jessica Rose,

Good preparation, contingency plans, and flexibility are traits of a good leader, project manager, and anyone that does not want anything to get in the way of surgery!   

Chrissy

[Anne Blake]

Jessica,

My therapist hooked me up with a therapist at the gender identity center in Denver which got me a second letter in about a month. Have you tried them yet?

Tia Anne

[Jessica_Rose]

All of the therapists I have contacted are listed on the Colorado Gender Identity Center website, except the long-distance one. I contacted two of them last week, and sent notes to four more today, including the remote therapist. I have appointments with the two I contacted last week, one claims they can have it done by 24 Jan, and the second now says maybe 1 Feb (originally they said maybe 7 Feb). A third therapist just contacted me, but I don't know if they can meet the deadline. I understand that I really shouldn't be so worried, but having been on this journey for so long and getting so close, any delay is unacceptable. I am trying to do everything I can to ensure a successful outcome, but my current level of stress is nearly overwhelming. I am not angry, sad, or upset, I am simply experiencing an exceptionally high level of anxiety right now. Hugs will be graciously accepted!

[ChrissyRyan]

All of the therapists I have contacted are listed on the Colorado Gender Identity Center website, except the long-distance one. I contacted two of them last week, and sent notes to four more today, including the remote therapist. I have appointments with the two I contacted last week, one claims they can have it done by 24 Jan, and the second now says maybe 1 Feb (originally they said maybe 7 Feb). A third therapist just contacted me, but I don't know if they can meet the deadline. I understand that I really shouldn't be so worried, but having been on this journey for so long and getting so close, any delay is unacceptable. I am trying to do everything I can to ensure a successful outcome, but my current level of stress is nearly overwhelming. I am not angry, sad, or upset, I am simply experiencing an exceptionally high level of anxiety right now. Hugs will be graciously accepted!

((((  H U G  ))))

Chrissy

[KathyLauren]

I totally get why this would be stressful!  (((((( HUG ))))))

[steph2.0]

<<<<<<<HUG!>>>>>>>

and

<<<<<<<DARK CHOCOLATE!>>>>>>>

Stephanie

[Donica]

Hugs and Dark Chocolate Jessica.

I won't be thinking about GCS letters until this June as that is my one year RLE anniversary. My current therapist is going to write my first letter and he will refer me to another therapist for my second letter. I'm hoping for early December but it may not happen till 2020 .

An interesting note about "cause stress so we will book another appointment soon!", SoCal Kaiser members have been complaining about having to send pictures or another in person visit with (in my case) dermatology to get another referral for more electrolysis time. I was told the same thing however, I called the Kaiser Trans Care services and they sent a new referral in the mail without having to send pictures or having to make another appointment with dermatology. Hummm?

[Laurie]

An interesting note about "cause stress so we will book another appointment soon!", SoCal Kaiser members have been complaining about having to send pictures or another in person visit with (in my case) dermatology to get another referral for more electrolysis time. I was told the same thing however, I called the Kaiser Trans Care services and they sent a new referral in the mail without having to send pictures or having to make another appointment with dermatology. Hummm?

Kaiser NW (Oregon) Asked me for lab results showing my testosterone below 100 for 6 months to a year. I did and my referral went in.