One Year of HRT!Today marks one full year on HRT. For some reason if feels like its been four years instead of one. 2018 was by far the most difficult time of my life. Towards the end of it, things got a lot better so let's hope it keeps going that way.
I honestly thought that I would be full time in the first 8 months or so. Then again, I also thought that transitioning was going to be easy. Don't get me wrong I have made improvements but its no where near what I need to be.
A few things that have changed in the past year on hormones:
My skin is ridiculously soft now. I never thought it would be like it is but I do bruise a little easier. Also, what little bit of body hair I did have is gone. I have lost a few pounds over the last year 143 all the way down to 119 and that one really bugs me daily. My eyes have changed for the worse. Some say its my age. It could be but funny thing is, at the beginning of HRT I had perfect vision. Now anything closer than 15 inches from my face is blurry. These next two are going to sound silly but I am about a half an inch shorter now than I was. I'm not complaining, 5'8½ sounds better than 5'9 to me. Lol Next thing is all my shoes are really loose. I'm not saying my feet got smaller but I can wear a ½ size smaller now. Possibly from weight loss?? I think as for as cup size I'm an honest "A". They have a nice shape so maybe they will just keep on going. My body shape has changed some too. I lost everything around the middle first It seemed like. I have a tiny waist. I did gain a little in my butt and thighs but I'm so skinny its hard to tell. I think my face has changed more than anything.
Mentally I have changed a lot too. My dysphoria is worse now more than it ever was. Getting on the scale, thinking about all the surgeries I need or seeing a good-looking woman in public gets me almost every time. Sometimes it last for a few days. I over analyze things people say sometimes, have emotional days, cry easier. I sound like a mess, right? lol On a positive I am a lot more "easy going". Estrogen has definitely calmed me down.
I am happy the way its going, I'm just very impatient. My doctor said that most get a lot of changes from month 9 to 18. Lets just hope she's right. I'm just not comfortable going out looking like I do. Just last week my therapist told me to keep going out that it gets easier the more you go. That might be true but I'm not happy with myself yet so there is no way. I only very recently got back into voice therapy. Its more difficult than I thought. Maybe that's just me being impatient again. It has changed a little but it's still very male sounding.
Good things will be happening this year. I got a quote on my hair transplant and I am saving for that now. I want to get that done as soon as I can because like everything else its very slow. That's another reason I don't like going in public is because there is only so much you can do to hide it. I have a little dental work to finally take care of this year also.
Business is still booming. I had to order a couple of new machines just to keep up with work coming in. I'm not complaining at all, looking back a few months ago I was in bad shape. I have three employees now so I'm moving up in the world. Lol
Just in case I didn't mention it before, me and mom are getting along very good. Its weird because we haven't been this close sense the 90's. I'm so happy I have the entire family on my side. My sister is the only one so far that has called me Chelsea. I get it and understand that its probably hard to get used too for them.
That's just about all I can think of. I'm not posting any body dimensions until I gain some weight. Over all I am happy with the way its going. I posted a before and after below. The first one is about four years ago and the last one is a couple of nights ago. I didn't do anything with my hair on purpose just to show how thin it really is. Waiting on that transplant is torture. I do love the curls though. I never knew it did that before because it was always short.
I guess this was a pretty good report. Hopefully 2019 will be a great year.
To the few that follow me thank you so much for the support you all have given me! I Love you all!
Chelsea
