Getting married

SweetGirl · March 10, 2018, 04:18:46 AM

Hey everyone, I'm new here. My name is Audri

I don't talk to many people and I don't have many people to open up to about this. I'm hoping to make friends here

I have been transitioning since I was 14. I am now almost 25. I have been on HRT 7 years this month and I couldn't be happier!

I am getting married next month to an amazing man who I love very much and have known a few years now. I'm super nervous and anxious about it all. My main concerns are moving(which will still be within my current state), and meeting his parents for the first time. We have yet to meet each other's parents and I couldn't be more nervous :/ I'm so afraid that they will dislike me for whatever reason. His Father is also a pastor at a church. I'm just unsure how they will feel about me. I have never met a guys parents before and it's always been one of my biggest fears. He is so sweet and caring and honestly, he completes me. He has told me his parents will love me, but I'm so afraid honestly. I'm just wondering if any of you have any advice? Or if any of you have been in this or a similar situation? Thank you

~Also, I'm looking forward to getting to know all of you[emoji171][emoji5]

SonadoraXVX · March 10, 2018, 05:10:25 AM

Well, first things first Audri, congratulations!!. Now to business, since the both of you are in your mid 20's, I'm assuming he is pretty comfortable introducing you to his family, so you should be ok, in the least or great in the best scenario.

Keep us posted on your meeting

Natsuki Kuga · March 10, 2018, 08:03:47 AM

Sane things you do when you're new in a foreign land:

- Smile a lot
- Eat their food

They'll love you

Tommi · March 10, 2018, 08:49:30 AM

Quote from: Natsuki Kuga on March 10, 2018, 08:03:47 AM
Sane things you do when you're new in a foreign land:

- Smile a lot
- Eat their food

They'll love you

Sage advice! Congrats, Audri

Breathe, relax, trust your partner. Tell is how it goes!

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Julia1996 · March 10, 2018, 09:21:13 AM

Welcome to the site. I'm Julia. I had a similar situation with telling my boyfriends family I was trans. I totally didn't want to but my boyfriend wanted them to know in case they found out later somehow. I was totally sure his parents and brothers wouldn't be accepting. I had visions of his brothers calling me ->-bleeped-<- or poof and his parents telling me to get out of their house. My boyfriend told me if he thought his family was going to react badly he wouldn't put me in that position and to trust him. It went really well and his family was fine with it, even his brothers.

I know how scary this is and I know you're probably imagining all the ways it could go south but trust that your boyfriend wouldn't put you in that position if he thought his family would react badly toward you. Also keep in mind that no matter how it goes you're marrying your boyfriend, not his family.

Im wishing you good luck and please let us know how it goes.

steph2.0 · March 10, 2018, 09:57:59 AM

Quote from: SweetGirl on March 10, 2018, 04:18:46 AM
Hey everyone, I'm new here. My name is Audri I don't talk to many people and I don't have many people to open up to about this. I'm hoping to make friends here

I have been transitioning since I was 14. I am now almost 25. I have been on HRT 7 years this month and I couldn't be happier!
I am getting married next month to an amazing man who I love very much and have known a few years now. I'm super nervous and anxious about it all. My main concerns are moving(which will still be within my current state), and meeting his parents for the first time. We have yet to meet each other's parents and I couldn't be more nervous :/ I'm so afraid that they will dislike me for whatever reason. His Father is also a pastor at a church. I'm just unsure how they will feel about me. I have never met a guys parents before and it's always been one of my biggest fears. He is so sweet and caring and honestly, he completes me. He has told me his parents will love me, but I'm so afraid honestly. I'm just wondering if any of you have any advice? Or if any of you have been in this or a similar situation? Thank you
~Also, I'm looking forward to getting to know all of you[emoji171][emoji5]

Hi Audri!

Welcome to the best place on the web for us. You'll find a lot of really cool, helpful people here. We're happy you're here.

As an older transitioning woman, I feel safe in saying that almost all MTF members of this forum envy you the quandary you're in right now. Very few of us will ever get to know the wonderful experience you're having right now. I'm guessing of course, but I suspect what you're feeling is the same thing any young woman would feel in your position.

Since you're new here, here's an outline of the guidelines for the forum that we send to our new friends.

Again, welcome!

Stephanie

Things that you should read

Site Terms of Service & Rules to Live By	Standard Terms & Definitions	Post Ranks (including when you can upload an avatar)
Reputation rules	Cautionary Note	Photo, avatars, & signature images policy

Kylo · March 10, 2018, 09:21:19 PM

It's perfectly normal for guys or girls to feel nervous meeting the SO's parents from my experience, there's just the added aspect of your situation which is understandable. I'm not sure I'd tell them immediately, maybe wait and see how they are with you on first impressions might be my instinct. But some people just want to get it out of the way and I get that too.

Lady Sarah · March 10, 2018, 10:52:41 PM

First, let me congratulate you.
All of my past friends had parents that hated me on first site. One was even forced to join the military. Before I met Phillip's mother, I told him about that problem. He told me he could not care less what she thought about me. When I did go see her, she would not get out of bed, or look at either of us, because she was angry about losing her son (source of money). I have still never seen her face, and he is not allowed at any family functions she says she will attend.
Some families can be peculiar.

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Artesia · March 10, 2018, 11:08:16 PM

Quote from: SweetGirl on March 10, 2018, 04:18:46 AM
I'm just wondering if any of you have any advice? Or if any of you have been in this or a similar situation? Thank you
~Also, I'm looking forward to getting to know all of you[emoji171][emoji5]

Be yourself.

I'm engaged, shortly after getting divorced. Her parents have been gone for a while. Her daughters and I met at a dinner not to long ago. I was so afraid to meet my future daughters, their husbands, and 9 of the 11 grandchildren. They were all so accepting! The oldest, who is the most protective of her mom, talked with me at length. After the conversation she said "welcome to the family, Claire". My future daughters young child(3YO) took to me like a fish to water. She sat with me, we held hands as we walked to the store, She wanted me to carry her for a bit. When it was time to go, she cried when I handed her back to her mother. I became mom, and grandma Claire, to them very quickly.

Long story short, be the best you that you can be!

stephaniec · March 10, 2018, 11:55:19 PM

congrats

Allison S · March 11, 2018, 03:28:48 AM

Congrats!! I think everyone's already said everything there is to be said. Maybe you're nervous because you're excited? I would be! It's normal to worry but honestly, if I can say, transitioning is way in your past.

I'm 27 and just started hrt a few short months ago lol yes I find my situation laughable, so I laugh at myself... I'm happy to hear someone close to my age has been transitioning for quite some time. I lived as a male and feel tainted. Anyway, it's nice to hear about your experience!

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