Stevi's Saga

[KathyLauren]

Congratulations on the name change, Stephanie!

[Stevi]

Paige and Kathy,

Thanks, girls.  I'm still giddy.

Stevi

[Stevi]

In a reply of mine to this thread I made on April 28th I mentioned a comment by my daughter about some "ideas" for her Daddy, as Stephanie.

Well, last night, after my daughter got home from her cruise and the hectic evening of me trying my best to tidy up enough loose ends of the renovation work I undertook to put a pause in the effort, my daughter presented both my wife and I with the usual gifts in remembrance of her trip and a thank you our house-sitting.  My wife received a Pandora bracelet and a palm tree charm.  I, in stead of the T-shirt, received a beautiful, rose gold, heart -shaped pendant and chain.  She had put it off until we began talking about getting ready for bed.  She had to swallow hard to overcome her apprehensions.  But, she put in the effort she needed to do it.  I thanked her and hugged her for both the gift and her effort.

Afterward, my wife told me that the "ideas' were about some kind of jewelry and my daughter asked about my tastes.  At that time, she was not sure she could do it.  In the end she found she could.

Oh, the renovation work was close to completion.  I have the closet space under the stairway to put the flooring down in, about half of the base moulding to put in and the moulding around the front door to replace.  I had to pause there because we needed to get back home for some other obligations.  I'll get back up that way in June, I hope, and finish up.

Stevi

[HappyMoni]

Stevi,
   That is great! It will get easier for her. What a positive step.
Moni

[Stevi]

Moni,

I am very hopeful that she will make it to a very good place.  I'll give time its way to do its magic.

I want you to know I hope for the best for all those in your life with problems.  I hope you have what you need to get through, as well.

Stevi

[Susan Baum]

Stevi, what a wonderful gift and message from your daughter.

... She had to swallow hard to overcome her apprehensions.  But, she put in the effort she needed to do it.  I thanked her and hugged her for both the gift and her effort.
Stevi

She actually overcame her fears twice in both selecting and then giving the pendant. I feel less fear and more acceptance may be coming into her heart. 

Hugs
Susan

[Stevi]

I picked up my name change order at the court house today.  I have stopped by the insurance agency and the bank and had them change their records .  No one seemed to have any problems at all with it.

I was breaking new ground at the bank.   The gentleman said it should be easy but he had not actually done it before.  I was properly gendered throughout the process which only took about five minutes.


The insurance was a little more complicated.  The clerk could handle the auto and home insurances with a simple request form.  My life insurance needed to be handled by the agent.  The agent was out at the time so I went back after doing a couple of other errands.  When I did get to meet with the agent, she was unsure about how to go about it and said she would need to get the info from the main office.  We got into the issue of gender marker change and had a brief discussion about how to address me- Miss, Mrs. or Ma'am.  I suggested Ma'am was best since I am married and therefore not really a Miss.  Mrs. is taken by my wife and we are still working out how she wants address me in public.  The agent said she had been surprised by my transition and might have a bit of a problem with addressing me properly but she was going to try her best.  I told her I could not ask for more than her best.  I to hear from her in the next few days about the name change on my life policy.

I spoke with the HR person at my employer this afternoon.  She has informed my immediate supervisor and he has no problem with my revelation.  We have set up a 10 am three way call tomorrow morning to just talk about it a bit.  Seems like all is well there.

This evening, my wife fixed dinner and we dressed up as a bit of a celebration of my "new life."  She suggested that she take a picture of me to use as an avatar.  So, what do you all think.

I fit all that into a day of running errands and getting four weeks of spring grass growth whacked down.

Stevi

[Paige]

Looking good Stevi

Paige

[KathyLauren]

The gentleman said it should be easy but he had not actually done it before.

Haha!  That's what the lady at my bank said, too.  I said, "Yes, neither have I!"

She suggested that she take a picture of me to use as an avatar.  So, what do you all think.

Looking good, Stevi!  But you should be smiling more after a great day like that.  HRT and makeup and clothes will do wonders for your presentation, but the single biggest feminizing accessory is a smile.  Don't worry, you'll soon get used to smiling a lot.

[Stevi]

Paige and Kathy,

Thank you.  My smile is the best I can do.  I cannot show much in the way of white since there isn't enough there to show.  In the past, I rarely smiled so I guess all those smile muscles are atrophied.  I'll have to start working them out regularly.

Stevi

[Stevi]

One more step.  I visited my new endo physician today.  She is a youngish woman and very pleasant and easy to talk to.  She has been doing transgender HRT for a bit more than a year.  Seems like a short time but I suspect the average experience for doctors in this field is not much more than that.  She explained her reasons for all her suggestions and recommendations and they made perfect sense.

Things went really well.  I'm in good health.  BP 108/72, cholesterol was marginally high but good now.  Weight is stable.   She was pleased that she did not have to worry about marginal high BP levels since a side affect of the HRT hormones is a tendency for BP to go up.  She took the time to let me relate my history with my HRT and my transition in general so she could get to know me better.  She recommended a few adjustments to my regimen. We stopped the Spiro entirely.  My T is all but 0.  Estrogen should hold that down by itself, now. She cut my progesterone in half for a couple more months. Then stop it entirely.  Her rational is that it will have probably done as much as it needs to do in my case for breast development (I'm a solid B) and it is not as well studied for its long term affects as she would like to use it beyond the time it does what it is intended for.  If I feel I need a little more of its magic, all I need to do is call and she will send in a script. She increased my estrogen by 50% because I am in the lower half of the female range and would like to get me into the upper half of the range.  She added finasteride to see if we can reawaken some of those hair follicles on the crown of my head.  I am not cue ball bald but I am very thin up top and have a receded hairline.  Worth a try to see if there is still some life up there  Come back in three months.

Also, I asked her to provide me with letters to submit with my gender marker change request .  She was happy to provide them and I had them in hand before I left her office.

I am incredibly pleased with her.  I had a really great day.

I am hoping to squeeze in a visit to Social Security in the morning before my 12 am therapy session, now that I am armed with my name change order and my physician's letter.

Stevi

[Stevi]

My wife and I stopped by the POP CULTURE popcorn shop this afternoon.  "What is so special about that?", you ask.  Well, I'll tell you.  The shop is the newly acquired business of the only fully accepting and supportive child, Joanna, of our friend, Rachael, whom we recently lost.

We spent some time with her and got to know her.  We had not met her before except to say our condolences to her at the funeral.  She is a lot like her father was.  We enjoyed spending the hour or so with her.

Something we learned about was some of the behind the scenes antics that the many non-accepting family members pulled.  What it amounted to was that most all of the family members wanted to violate Rachael's expressed wishes to be remembered and celebrated as the woman she knew herself to be.  Joanna fought and won the battle to see that Rachael's requests were carried out.  What we attended was remarkably respectful of Rachael and we had no reason to think that there had been such infighting behind the scenes.  Since the funeral, everyone has abandoned Joanna to let her deal, alone, with what was left behind when Rachael departed.

Stevi

[Donna]

It's a shame that family members act in such a way. They say they are loving until push comes to shove then their true nature come out.
Hope she finds comfort in the fact you made an effort to be friends with Rachael even for a short time and you took the time to visit her

[Stevi]

Stopped at the Social Security Administration Field Office in Wilmington, NC this morning.  I was at the front door at about 8:30 to begin waiting along with a half a dozen others for the 9:00 opening time.  A few minutes before 9:00 the doors were opened for the now twenty-five-ish of us.  I wanted to get started ASAP because my wife and I both had a therapy appointment later on that I did not want to chance missing.

The line proceeded to check in and each of us was issued a number after which we dutifully took a seat in the waiting area.  A couple of minutes after 9:00 the service windows began to open.  A minute or so later, the numbers began to be called.  I was called almost immediately since I was the third non-appointment person to check in.  When I sat down at the service window, the clock behind the service person showed 9:04.  When he asked, "What are you here for?", I passed my SS card and driver's license through, followed by my name change order and the letter I got from my doctor the previous day and I simply stated, "I am here to change my name and my gender designation in your records."  At 9:08 I was told, "This social security card needs to be shredded, you will not get it back.  Here are your other papers.  Your new SS card should arrive in the mail in 7 to 14 days.  Have a good day, Ma'am."

Another one bites the dust.  One step at a time.

If you discount the sixty-eight years of preliminary preparation, that was easy!

,
Stevi

[christinej78]

... At 9:08 I was told, "This social security card needs to be shredded, you will not get it back.  Here are your other papers.  Your new SS card should arrive in the mail in 7 to 14 days.  Have a good day, Ma'am."

Another one bites the dust.  One step at a time.

If you discount the sixty-eight years of preliminary preparation, that was easy!

,
Stevi

Hi Stevi,           11 May 2018

Reminds me of when I received my draft notice; I went to the draft Board and told them I lost my Draft Card. They issued me a new one, which is what I turned in to the Navy upon enlistment. Still have my original. Still have my original SS card, which is barely legible.

Sounds like you are moving right along. Hopefully I will follow not too far behind.

Best Always,
Christine

[Donna]

Stopped at the Social Security Administration Field Office in Wilmington, NC this morning.  I was at the front door at about 8:30 to begin waiting along with a half a dozen others for the 9:00 opening time.  A few minutes before 9:00 the doors were opened for the now twenty-five-ish of us.  I wanted to get started ASAP because my wife and I both had a therapy appointment later on that I did not want to chance missing.

The line proceeded to check in and each of us was issued a number after which we dutifully took a seat in the waiting area.  A couple of minutes after 9:00 the service windows began to open.  A minute or so later, the numbers began to be called.  I was called almost immediately since I was the third non-appointment person to check in.  When I sat down at the service window, the clock behind the service person showed 9:04.  When he asked, "What are you here for?", I passed my SS card and driver's license through, followed by my name change order and the letter I got from my doctor the previous day and I simply stated, "I am here to change my name and my gender designation in your records."  At 9:08 I was told, "This social security card needs to be shredded, you will not get it back.  Here are your other papers.  Your new SS card should arrive in the mail in 7 to 14 days.  Have a good day, Ma'am."

Another one bites the dust.  One step at a time.

If you discount the sixty-eight years of preliminary preparation, that was easy!

,
Stevi

I went to get my fingerprints yesterday and arrived at 08:00. Well they are on summer hours and not open until 09:00. Back to work and back over at 11:00. At 11:50 have my prints and paperwork for the registry office. 14:30 over to the registry office and fill in the proper  forms now that they have the new ones, way fewer questions now. Had to surrender my birth certificate and it will be destroyed. The issuing province will send out a new one after I send them way too much money. Anyways called vital statistics and they are all caught up and should process and send everything back by the end of next week or the middle of the next. Can hardly wait and the new forms don't require any medical info for the gender marker change anymore. So the new documents will be marked Female.

[Stevi]

Donna,

Good for you!  Is your part all done now?  Are you just waiting out the bureaucrats?  Hang in there.  You'll beat them!.

I still have three of my four major documents to deal with.  My birth certificate applications, one for the name and gender change and one to actually get a new certificate, need to be sent in by mail.  Hope to do that today or tomorrow for Monday's mail.  The driver's license and passport require photos.  I don't know if it will help but I want to visit a salon first so I have some chance of getting a good, even if lying, image on them.  Have to wait for a day or two for my social security changes to propagate through the system before I can do the DL, anyway.  Both of those need to be done in person.

Stevi

[Donna]

This is all the changes at the federal government level for this batch of paperwork. Next is drivers licence, health care card, a new birth certificate from Ontario and it will have the F on it.
Then I get to do everything else, credit and membership cards, banking vehicle registration and on and on. Lol

[Stevi]

Donna,

On and on and on and......

Seems we are in pretty much the same place in the process/

Stevi

[Stevi]

I was out working in the front lawn. Spraying the driveway to push back the jungle, actually.  My new neighbors from across the street were out in the front of their property and when they noticed that I was working right out at the road, they came over and introduced themselves.  The woman spoke up first and said her name was Beth and her husband was Will.  I paused, for what seemed like a long time, probably wasn't, for a quick calculation.  How do I start out with this new relationship?  I am ready to come out for the most part.  Just kinda want to get the i's and t's crossed on the paperwork before pulling the trigger on that at the gym where I swim in the mornings.  But why hide anything when I really want to get it all out there?  Added it all up and said, "Stephanie Jones."  I am now out in my neighborhood.  These are the first two people in town that have been introduced to Stephanie.

We spent a long time talking about things.  Their reason for coming over was to ask about internet service in the area.  I gave them the dope on that.  We talked about a lot of things.  It turns out that Will is a programmer of industrial equipment in the pharmaceutical industry, same as I.  He will have a need for reasonably high speed internet for when he semi-retires to work on projects from home or whereever his boat or travel trailer takes him and his wife.  Much as I have been doing.  A kindred spirit of sorts.

During the whole of the conversation, they gave no indication they even suspected I am transgender.  Just a pleasant conversation among a woman, Stephanie, and the new neighbors from across the street.

Stevi