Stevi's Saga

[Stevi]

Donica and Nicole,

No lapse in benefits.  I have not had an issue with either Social Security or medical payments for services.  My medical is not directly through the government.  It is through Humana as a Medicare PPO.  I do not know if there is a problem with direct medicare, but I doubt it.  I didn't seem to have any issue with the name change.  I think you will not have a problem.

I am just infuriatingly frustrated.  I should not have to be following up on any of this.  Then I have to do the legwork(waiting on hold) to talk to someone who has a different story.  You would think they would have  handle on this by now, but they just don't.  Some say they can't fix it then say they did.  Some say it was fixed but Medicare says it still isn't.  Some say a special unit will take care of it.  Some say the change will be in affect in 24 hours.  From some its 30 days.  One told me 90 days.  It is all electronic, for goodness sake.  Worst case, some kind of batch operation at mid-night or some such thing.  Why the ^**% is this so hard.

By the way, I have not received a call back from a supervisor.  Would bet lots of good money on that!  Maybe that is why it is so hard.  They don't know what they are doing and don't care.

I think my next move will be to visit an office and resubmit my gender change.  I just hope Trump's rascals don't put the kibosh on that before I can get there.  It has crossed my mind that that is already secretly in place.  Only real reason I don't believe it is that they are proud of what they are doing with regard to trans people.  I can't believe they would miss a chance to let everyone know how they are defending God and country.  I am getting cynical in my old age.

Just to be a little positive.  The repairs from Florence are all done for me.   I made out well.  My losses were minimal and the insurance was more than adequate and efficiently handled.

There are many others who are still far from recovery.  The task is huge and there is a shortage of contractors and labor.  Issues with permits and government oversight.  Not necessarily bad, just adds to the time it take to get things done. Unlike, me they are not able to do it themselves.

Stevi

[Jessica]

I think my next move will be to visit an office and resubmit my gender change.  I just hope Trump's rascals don't put the kibosh on that before I can get there.  It has crossed my mind that that is already secretly in place.  Only real reason I don't believe it is that they are proud of what they are doing with regard to trans people.  I can't believe they would miss a chance to let everyone know how they are defending God and country.  I am getting cynical in my old age.


Stevi

I feel your cynicism is justified.  My biggest fear from what is going on is that they are creating a list and using it when they are able.  What will happen to everyone's ID that has had a gender change?  I've seen history repeat itself already, this is an extreme low and unfortunately massive push back is required to change that.
I guess I've gotten cynical in my advancing age also.

Hugs and smiles from a California girl

[Stevi]

We spent much of the day with my wife's two sisters and one brother-in-law (He was a Methodist minister most of his life.).  After they received our coming out letter some months back, they expressed enthusiastic support.  They followed through today.  We had a great time together.  Not one hint of awkwardness.  They loved the pictures from the recent cruise.  They gratefully accepted some 4X6 copies of some of them.

I am so happy they were so loving. I wish some of my brothers and sisters were half as accepting and supportive.

In other news.  I now have a draft of the complaint our lawyers are working on with regard to losing our membership to the local fitness center when I asked about their transgender policy.  Penny and I need to go over it and, as our lead lawyer put it, "comment with abandon"  We will be traveling between Thanksgiving and Christmas so it will probably not get filed until the new year.  Don't want to file it then have issues with any appearance that might need to be made while we are not in town.  I will keep you all informed as this moves forward.

Stevi

[Northern Star Girl]

We spent much of the day with my wife's two sisters and one brother-in-law (He was a Methodist minister most of his life.).  After they received our coming out letter some months back, they expressed enthusiastic support.  They followed through today.  We had a great time together.  Not one hint of awkwardness.  They loved the pictures from the recent cruise.  They gratefully accepted some 4X6 copies of some of them.

I am so happy they were so loving. I wish some of my brothers and sisters were half as accepting and supportive.

In other news.  I now have a draft of the complaint our lawyers are working on with regard to losing our membership to the local fitness center when I asked about their transgender policy.  Penny and I need to go over it and, as our lead lawyer put it, "comment with abandon"  We will be traveling between Thanksgiving and Christmas so it will probably not get filed until the new year.  Don't want to file it then have issues with any appearance that might need to be made while we are not in town.  I will keep you all informed as this moves forward.

Stevi

@Stevi
Dear Stevi
This is great news regarding spending the day with your wife's sisters and brother in-law.  It is so nice to receive non-judgemental acceptance, especially from family and loved ones.

Yes, indeed, please keep us all informed about the legal battle you are having with your local fitness center....  this is certainly a subject of interest to all of us reading and following your thread.

Thank you for sharing.
Hugs and well wishes,
Danielle

[Donica]

I'm glad your family visit went well. Enjoy your trip through the holidays. No need to worry about the fitness club case until you guys get back. BTW, my new SSA card has arrived without skipping a beat in services.

Hugs,
Donica.

[Stevi]

I have just finished up  week of long days on site among many people whom I have known for many years.  Those I was likely to interact with were prepared by HR with "sensitivity" training and some particulars about who was going to make an entrance.  The week went well.  There were no truly negative interactions.  Many were happy to see me and happy for me.  Very few let on that anything was different.  If anyone was having a problem, they did not let me see it.  A couple of girls did stop for a moment for a personal conversation.  Nothing too invasive.  Just a few questions about how long and the like.  One of the girls declared, "So you finally did it!"  She is the only person that I know of that was not taken by surprise that I went over to the bright side.

I have had a good working relationship with the company for many years before my semi-retirement in my late fifties and throughout the years since.  I was thanked by the new manager for helping them out again.  He asked if I was open to doing more.  When I replied in the affirmative, he said he would have the people under him put together a list of projects that needed my expertise.

I worked hard and long hours but it was a really good week.

Stevi

[Donica]

Woo-hoo Stevi! Great news. Glad everything went well.

Hugs,
Donica.

[Stevi]

I have been reviewing the draft complaint from my attorneys.  We will be making three separate claims for relief.

A little background to catch up the new fans of Stevi's Saga.  Back in May, soon after my legal name change and during the time I was getting my documents corrected, I approached the management of my gym to inquire about a transgender policy.  Long story short, the eventual response, received in early July, was the termination of our family membership at our local fitness center without discussion or warning.

The first is "Breach of Contract" by the fitness center because "the Membership Agreement was terminated solely because Ms. Jones is a transgender woman." which is not one of the grounds specified in the contractual agreement between us.  We will be seeking actual damages on this claim.

The second is "Violations of Unfair and Deceptive Trade Practices Act" by the fitness center because the fitness center "terminated Ms. Jones's Membership Agreement in bad faith, without cause, and in violation of the Membership Agreement.  It terminated the Membership Agreement solely because Ms. Jones is a transgender woman."  "Terminating a contract based on the transphobia of the owner of" the fitness center "is immoral, unethical, oppressive, unscrupulous, and substantially injurious to consumers, including Ms. Jones."  We will be seeking actual and treble damages and recovery of attorney's fees on this claim.

The third is "Tortious Interference with Contract" by the owner of the fitness center.  (Tortious interference is when a third party interferes with an agreement between two other parties.  The fitness center is an LLC and under contract law a separate party from the owner.) The owner "had no justification to intentionally induce" the fitness center "not to perform the Membership Agreement.  His motives were not reasonably related to the protection of his legitimate business interests or the legitimate business interests of" the fitness center.  "His only motive for interfering with Ms. Jones's Membership Agreement with" the fitness center "was actual malice toward Ms. Jones, specifically based on the fact that Ms. Jones is a transgender woman."  We will be seeking actual and punitive damages on this claim.

We will be seeking damages, to be determined at trial, for each of the claims.  As you can see, all three claims are based on the transphobic attitude of the owner.  None of the claims for relief are based on anti-discrimination law.  I have no codified specifically gender identity discrimination law to protect me in North Carolina.  Rather, they are based on contract law and consumer protections.  I do not know if this tack had been tried before.  We shall see what happens.

I think I will see about delivering this lump of coal (this complaint) as a Christmas present to the owner of the fitness center via the GENERAL COURT OF JUSTICE, SUPERIOR DIVISION.   

What ya think, girls?
Stevi

[Donica]

It sounds good to me however I don't know much about the law other than if it's not in your membership contract, rules of conduct, dress code etc... then they can't legally do anything and are in breach of contract. So long as it is a lack of state transgender anti-discrimination laws this shouldn't have anything to do with it. I would guess if there is a state law specifically imposing transgender discrimination then that would be different but inhumane nonetheless.

Good luck Stevi.
Donica.

[Stevi]

After the HB2 fiasco was settled with its "repeal" the state of affairs is, as I understand it, that it is up to the business to treat transgender in whatever way it suits them.  Even when HB2 was in effect, the restriction on bathroom usage only applied to government provided or funded facilities.  It did not apply to private businesses.

The agreement provides only two causes for termination on his part.  Nonpayment of dues or conduct detrimental to his interest or those of other members.  He took the dues out of my account with automatic drafts.  There is a reference to the "rules" in the agreement but that makes no mention of transgender.  There was no conduct on my part that might have been objectionable unless you stretch the meaning of the word beyond all recognition.  Asking to talk is not conduct.

Stevi

[Stevi]

I BEAT 'EM!

Today, while traveling home from my work trip, I received a phone call from an unrecognised Maryland phone number.  Well, on the other end was a gentleman who informed me he was with Medicare.   He had good news.  In effect, he told be he had dealt with the idiots at Social Security and had them, finally, correct the gender information in MDR (master database record) in the master database.  It turns out that this is the record that must be correct for very basic information such as name, date of birth and gender.  The system regularly writes its contents to a working database that Social Security uses for its day to day operations and, to Medicare, which has its own working database for its day to day operations.  Theory is that correct information in the master record will automatically get distributed into the other databases.  But, it does an equally effective job of distributing errors into the working databases.  You can correct the working databases until the sun burns out but the corrections will never stick unless the master record is corrected.  No wonder I was told so often, "I fixed it!" only to learn later that it still was not fixed.  He told me he has to tell the idiots at Social Security to correct the master record for someone or another numerous times every day.

He is my hero!  I don't know how he got involved.  Maybe it was the rant I unloaded on the last Social Security service person I spoke with yelled at that did the trick.  I told him, if I knew where to send it, I would send him a gift.  He cannot accept gifts but jokingly said it would need to arrive in less than 45 days.  He has had 40 years of government service, 30 years with Medicare.  Retirement is in sight.  I joked back that he would soon be the the victim of Social Security and Medicare.  He replied that the last thing he would do before leaving was make sure his master record was correct.

So, just to be sure, I went on MyMedicare.gov and checked the personal information in my account.  It, finally, states FEMALE!

If you need help with this, you better act soon.  He is gone in 45 days.  Then the system is pure idiots.

I WON!
Stevi

[Donica]

That's good to know Stevi. If I have this problem, I will tell Medicare that SSA has to fix their Master record, or for that matter, tell SSA they need to fix their master record. Jezzz! What a headache! I'm glad you straightened them out on how to do their jobs.

Donica.

[Paige]

I BEAT 'EM!
I WON!
Stevi

Well done Stevi.  I'm glad it finally worked out.

[Northern Star Girl]

I BEAT 'EM!

I WON!
Stevi

@Stevi
Dear Stevi:
Ya-hoooo....  the old adage is "The squeaky wheel gets the grease.".... 
... nice job you did as you were "squeaking" to them. 
The proof is in the pudding.

Thank you for posting your good report.
Hugs,
Danielle

[Jenny1969]

Stevi

I think your daughter will come onboard in the future. Its like the 5 stages of grief because she might see this as a loss or death of her father. 5 stages.......Best of luck to you

Jenny

[KathyLauren]

I BEAT 'EM!

Just catching up on your thread, Stevi.  Woo-hoo!!!  So nice when you can get through to the one competent person in a bureaucracy of imbeciles!  I hope you have equal success with your lawsuit.

[Stevi]

Thanks girls,

Penny and I are on the road again.  We are making our way down the east coast toward Miami and another cruise ship.  This is our fourth cruise with our daughter.  Our first with her and Stevi onboard at the same time.

Our first stop is a town Georgetown, SC.  It is  port town  along the ICW we visited more than a few times back in the years we lived aboard our boat.  We walked down to the docks we came into with the dinghy to look out over the anchorage.  Tied alongside was 40ish foot sailboat with a couple onboard. We had a pleasant chat about our past and their present.

After leaving the dock we walked a ways along the boardwalk exchanging our mutual memories.  Then a stop at the ice cream shop for orange pineapple.  They didn't have any.  The girls tending the counter thought we were daft.   But then, last we were in, they were just toddlers.

Good day.  Good memories.

The anchorage from back in the day.  Dinghy dock in the foreground.



Penny settled for Chocolate-Black Raspberry.




Stevi

[KathyLauren]

Then a stop at the ice cream shop for orange pineapple.  They didn't have any.  The girls tending the counter thought we were daft.   But then, last we were in, they were just toddlers.

That is one of my wife's favourite flavours.  The ice cream boat just down the road from us had it this past summer.  It might be a regional thing.  I had never heard of it out west.

[Donica]

That looks like one big delicious ice cream cone. A two hander for sure. Penny looks like she's loving it. Have a wonderful trip you three. Looking forward to your updates.

Hugs,
Donica.

[Northern Star Girl]

@Stevi
Dear Stevi:
Thank you for posting your cheery and upbeat road trip update....   Penny's ice cream looks delicious but with the cold and snow and ice all around me, it is not quite as tempting as it usually is....   instead, I am going for hot soup, hot coffee, etc.
Continue having a safe and fun road trip and then be sure to enjoy yourselves on your Cruise with your daughter !!!  I am sure that she and you will be happy to be on her first cruise with "Stevi" on board.

Thanks again for keeping us all tuned-in on your adventures...
Hugs,
Danielle