Hi there!
My name is Charlie. I'm a non-binary (but more female) tgirl in my early thirties just beginning my transition.
Like many, I started occasional crossdressing in my early teens and spent years upon years in an on-again-off-again limbo with my femininity. If I asked myself what kind of body I would like to wake up in tomorrow if there would be no consequences, I knew for a long time that the answer would be, "A woman's body, duh!" But you construct an image of yourself growing up and if things don't fit into it, like being transgender, it's easy to compartmentalise them and hide them behind a wall of caveats.
But a couple of years ago I had an epiphany about my life in general; more specifically about my career path and desires to be a famous actor. Letting go of the person I thought I had to become in order to be happy was incredibly liberating; having the chance to explore my femininity more fully was a slower outshoot that came out of having more time on my hands, no constraints on how I had to look (for auditions) and a fresh perspective.
Last summer I came out to all my immediate friends and family in a mass email. And last NYE I came out to everybody else on Facebook. The level of support I've received across the board has been exceptional. One or two people needed a bit of time to get their heads round it, but they adapted quicker than they thought they would.
Buoyed by this tide of positivity, I started taking bigger and bigger steps, questioning long-held assumptions about my gender and so am planning even greater strides this year:
- laser sessions have almost completely removed my (hefty) beard now
- at-home IPL has made my body hair negligible
- my makeup skills have come leaps and bounds away from the disastrous results of a year or two ago
- I've got facial feminisation surgery planned for the start of the summer
- and hopefully I'll be on hormones by the end of 2018!
On a semantic level, I don't believe that the gender binary is anything other than arbitrary at best, so to call me a 'true' female feels redundant, but I know now that this side of me is the more authentic, the more inspirational and the more powerful side of who I am, so I can't wait to see where it'll take me!
Cx
