Someone's taking my makeup and money

[Allison S]

I couldn't find my mascara, I let it go. I figured I either misplaced it or it fell out of my purse after group and then dinner with members from the group.
Tonight, I went to a group members birthday party at their house and now on my home I can't find my eyeliner. And I'm also missing a 20 dollar bill... This is really weird. I'm not sure if I'm just losing things (I rarely did before this new group of "friends".

I don't know what to do. I thought my purse was near and I kept an eye on it. But now that I think about it I probably wasn't. It's just frustrating that this is happening and someone is possibly swiping me like this.

Sent from my VS501 using Tapatalk

[Northern Star Girl]

 
What is going on with that?  Suspects?
Hugs,
Danielle

[Allison S]

I have 4 (maybe 5, if we count one's bf that I saw both nights...) possible suspects. I'm trying to remember who sat on the carpet where my purse was on the floor right by where I was sitting on the couch...

I mean I'm not working and it sucks I keep losing things, and now money. It's not like I'll go broke over this but still it feels terrible. I feel like I'm targeted. I don't know if I should avoid these "friends". I may just keep my purse on me the whole time. I still don't know how this person does this. Especially the first time I had my purse on me the whole time... I think.

Sent from my VS501 using Tapatalk

[natalie.ashlyne]

That sucks yes not everyone is honest, I try not to keep and money on me except for maybe $10 dollars the rest I use my debt/credit cards I have that same problem I don't know were my stuff goes. Well I think I do but have to prove it. You may have to always have your purse on you or not keep money in it, yes it sucks but there is a lot of dishonest people in this world.

[Allison S]

Natalie, this comes as a shock to me. I never had that happen before, not in this way.
Anywho, it was a good night besides this whole mess. On my way to the party a guy asked "miss, do you want to play on basketball team?" And again when I didn't really respond "miss?" he said. This was very quick and honestly I was shocked he was even talking to me.
Guys have been staring more and more. Women have been giving me looks. I can't read women's looks though. I never really look back.

Sent from my VS501 using Tapatalk

[Allison S]

I know what I'm gonna do. I'm gonna casually bring it up in group but not say I "suspect" anyone, I may hint that I have my doubts and mistrust them, but I will keep it to the point to let them know I'm on to them.
Wish me luck... We were supposed to meet this Saturday, possibly at my place, to do makeup and go out. Yeah, that's not gonna happen. We can just meet somewhere else.

Sent from my VS501 using Tapatalk

[natalie.ashlyne]

Natalie, this comes as a shock to me. I never had that happen before, not in this way.
Anywho, it was a good night besides this whole mess. On my way to the party a guy asked "miss, do you want to play on basketball team?" And again when I didn't really respond "miss?" he said. This was very quick and honestly I was shocked he was even talking to me.
Guys have been staring more and more. Women have been giving me looks. I can't read women's looks though. I never really look back.

Sent from my VS501 using Tapatalk

Well congratulations on getting called miss must have been exciting, and yes guys will stare and check out merchandise and well women can never be read they are a mystery.   

[Allison S]

Well congratulations on getting called miss must have been exciting, and yes guys will stare and check out merchandise and well women can never be read they are a mystery.   

Mystery. Yes that's the word to describe the faces they make. Lol sometimes they look so disgusted. The men rarely make any expression, it's just blank stares from them. I lied, I do look back at the women and they usually look away.
I'm visibly trans right now on hrt alone mostly. I guess this is what I have to work with for now. I did call and schedule a consultation for ffs later in the summer.

I just need someone's honest opinion on why I feel like I'm getting hostility thrown at me. Is it really "transphobia" like my therapist mentioned? I don't like using that term and honestly, I don't know if that's it.

Maybe I'm alone in my mini "dilemma" here but it's part of what I'm trying to work through right now.

Sent from my SM-G930T using Tapatalk

[Allison S]

I didn't even wear eyeliner yet when he called me miss. Lol but it was stolen soon after anyway so...

Sent from my SM-G930T using Tapatalk

[natalie.ashlyne]

Mystery. Yes that's the word to describe the faces they make. Lol sometimes they look so disgusted. The men rarely make any expression, it's just blank stares from them. I lied, I do look back at the women and they usually look away.
I'm visibly trans right now on hrt alone mostly. I guess this is what I have to work with for now. I did call and schedule a consultation for ffs later in the summer.

I just need someone's honest opinion on why I feel like I'm getting hostility thrown at me. Is it really "transphobia" like my therapist mentioned? I don't like using that term and honestly, I don't know if that's it.

Maybe I'm alone in my mini "dilemma" here but it's part of what I'm trying to work through right now.

Sent from my SM-G930T using Tapatalk

I do know how you feel Allison I feel the same way I am just on HRT I have not had any work done yet want to though I think guys have blank stares even looking at cis women because the don't want to fully look like they are checking them out. Well some cis women I find get judgmental I have been told "now what you want to steal our husbands now"  and "do you really think you look good in that". Some women have insecurities  and take it out on others whether trans or cis. I have seen this from working with mostly women for the last 14 years the ones that like you and know you will be your best friend and the ones that don't are usually jealous and catty and will project their insecurities on you. I personal think you look great and have a great body.

[natalie.ashlyne]

I didn't even wear eyeliner yet when he called me miss. Lol but it was stolen soon after anyway so...

Sent from my SM-G930T using Tapatalk

I agree with the guy that called you miss I think you look great and totally see female

[Allison S]

Thanks Natalie. You help so much uplifting me. I can tell you're a great person and from your posts a woman that I look up to... thank you so much!!

I think there ought to be a reason I didn't transition youngER. I need all the mental fortitude for this, and I'm still so early in the process. Anyway, I feel bad complaining. This whole post I think is unnecessary yet here I am I can't sleep and I'm typing this. Well I still don't regret transitioning.

So I see my family on Saturday- in 2 days. I haven't seen some of them in almost a month. I don't know how they'll react to me. This is gonna be a bumpy ride for sure

Sent from my SM-G930T using Tapatalk

[natalie.ashlyne]

Thanks Natalie. You help so much uplifting me. I can tell you're a great person and from your posts a woman that I look up to... thank you so much!!

I think there ought to be a reason I didn't transition youngER. I need all the mental fortitude for this, and I'm still so early in the process. Anyway, I feel bad complaining. This whole post I think is unnecessary yet here I am I can't sleep and I'm typing this. Well I still don't regret transitioning.

So I see my family on Saturday- in 2 days. I haven't seen some of them in almost a month. I don't know how they'll react to me. This is gonna be a bumpy ride for sure

Sent from my SM-G930T using Tapatalk

Aww thank you, You are very sweet, and yes there is always the right time for everything and everything happens for a reason. No your post was necessary that is what you felt at the time and it helps others learn to so never be afraid to post. And I hope every thing goes well with your family. I can tell you that my sister does not know I transitioned we have not spoke in 4 years she owes me money and ignores my calls or texts and my father I have not spoke to him in 17 years so he does not know either. Like I said before if you ever want to talk you know how to get a hold of me. You rock girl 

[Allison S]

OMG so I found my mascara in my room... I'm so embarrassed... I must've dropped my eyeliner at my friend's house. I'm VERY relieved at my HUGE mistake. Glad I didn't outright accuse anyone... still I think there was a lot of tension at the party last night lol I'm really relieved!! It was a fun night...[emoji4] sorry for being so accusatory.. I learned my lesson (I hope)

Sent from my SM-G930T using Tapatalk

[natalie.ashlyne]

Well I am happy you found it and hope you can find the money too.

[Northern Star Girl]

Natalie, this comes as a shock to me. I never had that happen before, not in this way.
Anywho, it was a good night besides this whole mess. On my way to the party a guy asked "miss, do you want to play on basketball team?" And again when I didn't really respond "miss?" he said. This was very quick and honestly I was shocked he was even talking to me.
Guys have been staring more and more. Women have been giving me looks. I can't read women's looks though. I never really look back.

Sent from my VS501 using Tapatalk

@ Allison:  Like Natalie stated in her comment to you....  there is no mystery as to why you are getting attention from the fellas... You LOOK absolutely female in your pictures... beautiful female!!!
When I first started transitioning and was going out and about in female-mode I had made the same mistake when someone would say miss, or ma'am or in some way referred to me as a female....  and when I went full-time and changed my name to my female name it is like I don't even hear it when they spoke to me.....  but NOW, it is so lovely and wonderful to have these things happen... and to also hear them calling me by my female name...  very helpful with our self-confidence and self-assurance.

Hmmm, perhaps you should accept the obvious hint and play on the (women) basketball team .... I am sure that like most guys, he was amazed at your height.... tall women always get all of the attention and if you wear high heels that would really get them to look....     Hmm, basketball...  that would not work for me...  I am only 5' 4"  so I would have to be joining the pee-wee league. LOL

Yes, per your last comment, I know from personal experience that women do "look"....  I used to get very nervous when I saw them checking me out, but later now in my transition I assume that they are just jealous!!!!  LOL
Hugs,
Danielle

[Allison S]

New occurrence that's been happening with the "women" is that they chuckle or laugh when they walk past me haha they're always with someone else, a friend or boyfriend when this happens [emoji38]
I can tell because they're staring at me and as soon as we pass each other they laugh
I can't wait for my hair to grow long in a year or two so I can flick and twirl it while batting my eyelashes [emoji4]

Sent from my VS501 using Tapatalk

[Allison S]

Oh and I'm 5'7". I see plenty of women who tower over me here in nyc. Most are around my height or shorter though. Yes with heels I'm definitely "tall"
I see tall women and they're beautiful!! I'm usually not attracted to women but damn do they look good

Sent from my VS501 using Tapatalk

[Julia1996]

I'm glad you found your make up. Did you find your money?  Sad to say but sometimes someone you would never imagine would steal from you actually does. I had money disappearing for a couple of months. I'm not careless with money and I couldn't imagine how I kept losing money. Finally I caught a friend red handed taking money from my purse. I asked her why she would steal from me and she said it wasn't a big deal. When I told her that yeah, it was a huge deal she said her dad never gave her money or anything else and that  my dad would give me anything I asked him for and that I could easily get more money from him. So yeah, that friendship ended real quick.

I've never had anyone steal my make up but I have had someone use my makeup without my permission which pissed me off as much as someone stealing it. My brother was dating this stupid girl and she would hang out at our house on Saturday and then she would get ready for them to go out that night at our house. She would shower in my bathroom, use my shampoo and other shower stuff, use my hair dryer and my hair products and then use my makeup. All without ever asking me! I told Tyler he needed to tell her to stay the hell out of my makeup and beauty products.  He said except for his one shelf the bathroom was packed with my makeup and beauty products and that I had so much he didn't see why it was a big deal to let her use some.  I tried to explain to him that my makeup and stuff were personal but he didn't get it. He told me it was kind of small of me to be territorial over makeup. So I just took all my makeup out of the bathroom. Thankfully he dumped her a couple weeks later.

[Allison S]

Why did he dump her? Honestly I wouldn't mind if my friends used my stuff. I'd even give it to them, but just the thought of them stealing it out of my purse while we're out made me sick. A girl needs her makeup on her at all times!! Lol

And no I don't know what happened to the 20 dollars.. I'm wondering if I even had it on me now. Luckily I only carry a bit of cash on me. But now I'm gonna go with Natalie's advice and carry even less. It's just not worth dealing with a headache.

Sent from my SM-G930T using Tapatalk