Katie Jade’s stuff

[Jessica]

Hi
I think I may like to share a few posts with you guys on my progress issues and generally my life as it progresses.

Summary so far;

55 years old and cant remember a time I didn't feel different..
Married 25 years and separated  start of March 18.
2 beautiful sons 17 and 20
Best friend is my separated wife -  very few friends since I have always internalised my 'gift' and avoided detection wherever possible until last year
HRT about 4 and a bit months I think (see timer below)

So, not posted anything in last couple of months as I couldn't use PC as I had both (yes both) eye lenses replaced due to cataracts, and due to a rotation of one of them had to undergo repair surgery earlier this week. But I can see now so that's good.

Situation with my best friend is that we are both active in bringing up our kids and that is where my main personal issues lie.

No 1 son has said he understands my transition and wishes me well, but today he admitted that he cant take the separation from my ex-wife at all.. not good
No2 son seems on the fence but he openly stated he doesn't like it to my ex-wife (we live separated atm)

So I'm getting my head around that one (or two).

Personally, I'm really good , T is so low they cant read it, E is 364 whatevers per ml, which is a bit low but has really changed my body a lot.

I am internally very happy and smile a lot - cry a lot at films and worry a lot about my nails which seem to break off every time I work on the bike or car,,, grrr

Weight loss has stopped. That's bad, lost 32 lb (was 40 but put weight on during the 2 months of surgery as I cant work out at all) need to loose another 32.. am 210 a the moment.

Finally my local Gender clinic has received the letter from my Doctor so I hope that I will get a positive response from them this week, but its 2 to 2.5 years for the first appointment here in the UK at my local centre..(that's why I have gone private initially as I couldn't stand waiting that long and then the 1 to 2 years real life experience required before getting hormones - 'What the Hell' I hear you cry - that's the UK regime at the moment as far as I understand)

Well that's enough from me - avidly reading loads of others life threads which to be honest are more exciting than mine.

Lot of love and Hugz
Katie

Love the new thread name too🌸🌸🌸

[Katie Jade]

Not much happening at the moment.
Hair growth slowed right down, which is a pity as I still have a lot of grey to get rid of on my face...
Painting and decorating today, washing curtains, picking car up from garage (service and MOT).
Tomorrow off to support group and hopefully meet some new friends. Going on my own so more confident as I know where I am going this time. A short walk from the car park to the meeting should be ok.
My hair on my head is getting a pain as its loose and keeps blowing in my eyes. Im pretty much useless at hair control, so another skill to learn..

Playing around with eye make up yesterday, sort of a blue/purple/red thing going on. Looks like I have walked into a door or something. Still I'm getting a bit better at this (but not by much).


Ignore the eyebrows as they will get sorted when I go full time.

So not much happening, life goes on and its still good.

Luv n Hugz

Katie

[Kendra]

I ignored my eyebrows and then one day my electrologist offered to change them.  I said yes.  She's an electrologist for 20+ years and a woman 60+ years so I figured has the experience and I was right.  This was before I was full time.  Close friends immediately noticed the improvement, unprompted.  I didn't sense any odd reactions from anyone else. 

She did this gradually.  The change was very slight but made a very nice difference.  During several sessions for beard removal she visually moved my eyebrows up just slightly each time - carefully eliminating eyebrow hair below the brow line, never changed anything from mid to upper area. 

[Northern Star Girl]

I ignored my eyebrows and then one day my electrologist offered to change them.  I said yes.  She's an electrologist for 20+ years and a woman 60+ years so I figured has the experience and I was right.  This was before I was full time.  Close friends immediately noticed the improvement, unprompted.  I didn't sense any odd reactions from anyone else. 

She did this gradually.  The change was very slight but made a very nice difference.  During several sessions for beard removal she visually moved my eyebrows up just slightly each time - carefully eliminating eyebrow hair below the brow line, never changed anything from mid to upper area.

@Katie Jade
Dear Katie.......
As @Kendra and I have previously talked about eyebrows recently on another thread, we both agreed that eyebrow shaping is a very important step, not only in passing, but also in our own self-affirmation.  It is one of the key visual clues to appearing and being female.

Oh.... and as others have mentioned to you.... your "new" name on here Katie Jade is very nice.... however I have missed seeing your thread several times lately because I came to fondly know you by your old name Katie Again.....   either way, I always enjoy exchanging thoughts and opinions with you... and I am an avid follower of your thread and your transition successes... and sometimes disappointments.   Your followers here on the Forums are your biggest fans.

Hugs and hugs,
Danielle

[Katie Jade]

@Katie Jade
Dear Katie.......
As @Kendra and I have previously talked about eyebrows recently on another thread, we both agreed that eyebrow shaping is a very important step, not only in passing, but also in our own self-affirmation.  It is one of the key visual clues to appearing and being female.

Oh.... and as others have mentioned to you.... your "new" name on here Katie Jade is very nice.... however I have missed seeing your thread several times lately because I came to fondly know you by your old name Katie Again.....   either way, I always enjoy exchanging thoughts and opinions with you... and I am an avid follower of your thread and your transition successes... and sometimes disappointments.   Your followers here on the Forums are your biggest fans.

Hugs and hugs,
Danielle

Kendra and Danielle,
I thank you both for your nice comments. I fully agree that brows so much frame and make a face. I cant do much at the moment as its just a bit difficult at work due to starting to change too much anyway. My chest is my biggest give away so Im permanently wearing a sports jacket even in the hottest heatwave we have had here for a while (thanks be Autumn and Winter are on their way) as well as face softening, longer hair, etc, actually I think they must all be blind to not see what is going on (or they ae not saying). Whatever, it will happen when it does, controlled or uncontrolled, at least HR know I am transitioning now (I did post this before..).
Its just that I don't think I have too bad a general eyebrow shape considering (they are a bit uneven), and indeed I remove stray dark hairs when I feel like it (a lot at the moment), they just need sharpening when I am ready. The pic I posted was with untouched brows, they are a bit arched anyway.

My Electrolysist is 72 by the way, and thankfully she still has good sight, has treated many TG over the years and is so very nice. She did a patch test for Electrolysis on my right middle jaw line the other week and was pulling them out at about 10-15 sec intervals tops, some quicker. They were about 4 to 5 mm long (I had last shaved 30 hours before as I was due IPL), but she says I have strong deep follicles.. which I suppose is bad, more potential for ingrown to occur etc. And a lot are grey, so a few years to go for Elec... Not looking forwards to that, Im sure there must be a better way..

Anyway, painted gloss and silk emulsion on my Lounge /diner today, 2 coats of white, and only got a couple of drops on the carpet (I did cover carpet and furniture) which resulted in rigorous scrubbing to remove it (water based paints as Im a cheap-skate.. and too impatient for things to dry - clothes, paint, varnish etc..) So Im happy but aching at the moment.
So hopefully Im off to one of my support groups tomorrow afternoon, sited in the middle of a town some way from the carpark..), and it looks like a new neighbour maybe this weekend, meaning that I may have to clump past them in my booties and fineries tomorrow as they move in. Still, Im getting used to going through that 'zone' somewhat now.

Finally (really? - that seems to usually be a premature statement for me) Amazon Delivered the frame for my Grandma's picture so it is duly mounted and in a place of honour. I saw her 2 hrs before she passed (99 and 10 months) and my Dad said I was the last person she spoke to. Such an privilege and honour for me. So the picture is set next to a picture of my Mum and Dad on their scooter when they toured Europe whilst courting in the 50's, and one of my Ex and my boys when they were small. They are all placed so whenever I go upstairs I see them. A duplicate of my ex and boys is placed to be seen when I go downstairs as well. These are the good things that I have done in my life. It gives me hope.

Wow, sorry got a bit blubby then.

Ill call it a day for posting my stuff I think, just going to read recent posts elsewhere and make my usual sort of comments (often well meaning but blundering  )

Luv n Hugz

Katie

[Northern Star Girl]

@Katie Jade
Dear Katie:
I really enjoy your multi-subject updates... what you say clearly gives your followers a snapshot of your everyday life.  This is good because then we all know that you are "human" like the rest of us.

You had stated in your update:

Wow, sorry got a bit blubby then.

No worries, you can get a bit blubby whenever you wish...
...after-all it is your thread and by the way your followers like to read what you say.

Please keep your updates up to date!!!!
Hugs,
Danielle

[davina61]

The new neighbour thing, just had a load of folk move into the empty flats and so far have meet 2 of them . The one lot only in work clothes . Must see about getting my brows done as well ,only 5 weeks to go!!!

[Katie Jade]

Third attempt at posting something today... may be brief

So Went to the start up support group that I went to a few weeks ago, there were more attendees there this time. There was a lot of talking, tea and a few biscuits as well. It was really nice. There were also 2 teenage girls there who were with an NHS nurse, and they we so inquisitive about everything, so conversations ranged from feelings, shoes, relationships, shoes, hobbies, shoes,, etc (Shoes). However they mainly talked to the post-op girls there, I was too busy making friends but would have talked with them both if they needed of course.

The local "bobbies"  dropped by as well so they know what was going on. They were lovely women and chatted to us for a bit. They were very reassuring.

So here I am when I got home - again I don't like taking pics in the group settings without prior agreement etc - another pic of me sitting down (I do that too much maybe);



The eagle eyed of you will see the pic of my Gran on the Indian PowerPlus (with flat handlebars - a racer maybe?) almost a Century ago.
Finally, and definitely finally, after my painting epic yesterday, my bbf (Ex) is coming over to help/teach me to do wallpapering. She always did it when we were living together and never let me get a chance. That will finish my main living room except for getting the carpets professionally cleaned.

Need a glass of wine and a good film now - so Cheerio!!

Luv n Hugz

Katie

[Northern Star Girl]

@Katie Jade
Dear Katie:
YES, even before I read all of your post I did indeed notice the picture and was going to ask about the motorcycle.  Wow, a pic of your gran on the Indian... Indian bikes were quite the motorcycle to have back then... of course, as you know, they are back in business making motorcycles again.

Regarding group photos anywhere, I am very careful to not have others pictured without their permission or lacking that I will "blur out" their faces.  It is the right thing to do, especially in a trans-group setting.

Hmm, wallpapering.....  when I did some of that I usually tried to get a pattern without having too many issues with matching the edges.   Some patterns are such that you can waste a foot or two on every strip that you put up just trying to match the edge patterns.   I had a married friend that told me that a good way to get a divorce or at the very least have a big argument is to hang wallpaper together.

Please relax and enjoy your wine and movie...
Thanks for another one of your fun updates.

Hugs,
Danielle

[Katie Jade]

Danielle,
Wow you respond to my posts quickly, which is nice, but Im sure they aren't that interesting, just meanderings and bumbling for the most part, still its the day to day stuff we all do, and this is a sort of journal for me even though its sort of public.
But yes, she (Ex) wallpapered one bedroom wall for me a couple of months ago, and she was cussing after about 5 mins, but it gets stuff out of her system and makes the rest of the day good for her, so I will keep on requesting 'lessons' in wallpapering just to keep helping her (coughs.. ahem.. coughs again). She has a lot of perseverance, and I will always love her for that as I,,, well, probably wouldn't be here without that from her.
On to happier stuff, the wine had wine-fly/sour so it got poured away, so I'm on Mothers Ruin, i.e. Gin and Tonic + ice + fresh lemon slice (you may notice I love Lemons and Limes...)- low carbs so Im ok on that. I do have a spirit measuring cup, but it seems too small so I use a pint pot instead (joke..). I do realise that our livers take a beating from some of the necessary medicines we take, and from some of the exotic foods we eat, so I don't over indulge (not too much anyway), so try and take care of it.

Well that got a bit random, anyway I was a bit jealous of next door neighbour off out after a few 'loud' drinks with her friend tonight. Must do partying more I think (watch and learn to start though), so better see what outfits to wear for the Sept gathering of the Susan's UK 'branch'... MMM looking forwards to disappointing everyone there . Well Ill try anyway (sack of potatoes mode maybe).

Luv n Hugz

Katie

[Katie Jade]

So decorating finished for the day, mainly done by me supported by my Ex as teacher. First wall papering in 56 years, Ive learnt so much recently for some reason...

So half way through (I jumped into it until I was reminded that I should be taking pictures) is here;



And then as if by magic (about 2 hours later...);



And for reference as this is a lounge diner here's the other view from atop the TV (was a bit precarious);



Yay, done.

Or not..

Moving all the furniture reminded me that the carpet needs cleaning. The previous residents occasionally smoked (not certain what they smoked though) and I picked up the slight old stale smell you get, so its either a new carpet, but I cant afford that at the moment, or to rent a cleaner with some nice smelling carpet shampoo. So I'm carpet cleaning next but not until next weekend at the earliest. Oh such fun and joy awaits.... not.

Ok I'm off - I need to login to work and pick up probably 500+ emails from this week as I am taking no-work holidays now. And of course to cook and eat tea which will be a small steak with Cauliflower cheese again. I have half of one in the fridge and Im not wasting it. I might have some Courgettes in garlic as a side.

Tummy rumbling now

Luv n Hugz

Katie

[Katie Jade]

Hehe, as usual I missed something....
My next job was going to be to fit the wireless alarm that's on the table in the last Pic. Just for my peace of mind as Im single woman now I suppose.

Need a long ladder though to put the bell/flashing light up though, which I don't have so Ill need to call a handy man to do that bit.

Bye

Luv n Hugz

Katie

[Northern Star Girl]

Heh as usual I missed something.
My next job was going to be to fit the wireless alarm that's on the table in the last Pic. Just for my peace of mind as Im single woman now I suppose.

Need a long ladder though to put the bell/flashing light up though, which I don't have so Ill need to call a handy man to do that bit.

Bye

H&K's

Katie

@Katie Jade: 
Dear Katie: Every woman should have a "handy man" handy. 
Reminded me of an oldies song by James Taylor titled Handy Man... lyrics below:
Hugs,
Danielle

Hey girls, gather round
Listen to what I'm putting down
Hey baby, I'm your handy man

I'm not the kind to use a pencil or rule
I'm handy with love and I'm no fool
I fix broken hearts, I know that I truly can

If your broken heart should need repair
Then I'm the man to see
I whisper sweet things, you tell all your friends
They'll come runnin' to me

Here is the main thing that I want to say
I'm busy twenty-four hours a day
I fix broken hearts, I know that I truly can

Come, come, come, come, come, come, come on
Yeah, yeah, yeah
Come, come, come, come, come, come
Oh now, they'll come runnin' to me

Here is the main thing I want to say
I'm busy twenty-four hours a day
I fix broken hearts, baby, I'm your handy man

Come, come, come, come, come, come, come
Yeah, yeah, yeah
Come, come, come, come, come, come, come on
Yeah, yeah, yeah

That's me
Come, come, come, come, come, come
I'm your handy man
Yeah, yeah, yeah
That's me
Come, come, come, come, come, come
I'm your handy man
Yeah, yeah, yeah

[Katie Jade]

Dear Danielle

Yes just listened to that song, I know I've heard it before, and its nice so I enjoyed listening to him on YouTube, he has a good voice obviously but its a warming one if you know what I mean. Thanks for reminding me of it, its good to read the lyrics along with hearing the song so thanks for posting them for me. That will be in my memory now for quite a while, waiting to pop up when I need it, or at least a recollection of a good feeling and some of the words, all of the melody, and a recollection of your post, nice.

Was online but AFK as I was just wading through the 300 or so emails sent to me whilst I was off work. Luckily (not) no one care that I am a week behind everything so they have fully booked me Monday and Tuesday, so sat on my bum in meetings I will have little input into. I even had to cancel some as I have my first scheduled meeting with HR tomorrow to discuss our planning for the big reveal of Katie at work. We have a long time to plan as I do need to shed some mass or it wont work for me, let alone my colleagues friends and foes at work. My aim is to ensure that HR are fully and more importantly truly behind my transition at work. I need to put some thought into what to discuss tomorrow, before I go to sleep. This is my biggest issue and its basically coming out to the 2000 or so employees on site at the same time due to my position and involvement with all departments. Im a key person on critical delivery plans with site wide responsibilities. My Employers need to get this right as well. Im more concerned over the social side of things though. Lets see then, but a nice flexible plan would suit me best. Will go 'Deep Thought' mode in a bit.

On a more interesting note, I took my own advice and had the following meal (Only had 2 Lattes and a yoghurt all day + water of course, as I wasn't hungry until I logged on here and went through the food postings.. );



Small steak (fillet), cauliflower cheese, courgette slices and 3 diced garlic cloves which were cooked with the Courgette slices in butter. Glass of Red and I'm a happy girl .

For tomorrow I will have sliced ham with sweet salad with green olives and sun dried tomatoes, maybe with a bit of ground pepper. That will be done in a minute and taken to work tomorrow.

For Tuesday it will be the same but tuna flakes instead of ham. Wed the same but with smoked salmon, then chicken breast on Thursday. Friday is a short day so I will go home and probably have more ham, although I should really do something with the remaining ham before that. OK that's food list in my head for the week, I need to plan now so;

Luv n Hugs

Katie

[KathyLauren]

Hey girls, gather round
Listen to what I'm putting down
Hey baby, I'm your handy man

I'm not the kind to use a pencil or rule
I'm handy with love and I'm no fool
I fix broken hearts, I know that I truly can

Oh, my, flashback!  About 1977, I think.  Thanks for that. 

[Katie Jade]

So, a little update from me.

Personally Im still in a good place.
This has been bolstered by coming out to 2 of the 3 final direct reports that don't know about me yet. Both pretty supportive (blokes again). One was quite good in realising the challenge ahead, as his sisters best friend is trans as well, and he thinks she is really nice and so much a better person after her journey (was mid 20s though..). So 100% OK so far, maybe the world has changed from 10, and 20, and 30, and 40 years ago. Or maybe I wasn't looking. Too busy hiding I think. Never mind I'm here now and all the more gorgeous and personable for it. Well I think so anyway.

So, onto the mundane;

Shampooed carpets in living/dining room as they still smelly with previous occupants smoking and dog stuff (EWWWWW). Used a carpet cleaner that wets, scrubs and sucks up the muck. First 9 litres of water came back like melted chocolate ice-cream but runnier. Disgusting. Second was like vanilla cream. Overall because I scrubbed my 20 foot by 18 foot room twice, it  took 12 loads of 9 litres of brown and vanilla coloured water to get as far s I could today. All windows were opened so it would air dry and then central heating was  put on as the heavens opened and it really rained outside here with the resultant temperature drop. I will try the main areas of carpet concern again tomorrow as well as the entrance hall and the upstairs landing. They should be better I hope. I will lend Ex the cleaning unit before it needs to go back, as she has a spot carpet cleaner and I need to do the stairs and corners with that.

That's tomorrow sorted.

Eldest son and his gf were supposed to be coming round tonight but they are too busy packing as her parents are taking him on holiday for 10 days with them somewhere in Spain we think but he wont tell us where. (I cant afford to do that or help out at this time).

Went to one of my support groups last night, and one of the girls shouted out as I was explaining to another girl where I grew up (about 50 miles from the support group). She knew the exact house where I grew up, and although 5 years younger than me we chatted about all the common stuff we knew about. She had grown up less than 5 miles from me it seems. Was really nice as she is a very gentle and poised girl, and I'm still very rough at the edges and learning remotely it seems (YouTube etc). I need to so get out more, as I need the social experience with the general public and not just trans groups, if I am possibly out at work and maybe FT around Xmas or early next year. The girls at the support group all think I would be OK, but its my doubting mind again..

All my doubts about coming out so far have been unfounded though, am I a slow learner (?), maybe, but I think I have been hiding and ashamed too much to change in a few months.

Enough of that as I need to change subject..

So my cis female nephew has said she wants to come and meet me for the first time soon, as soon as her boys are back at school. I will take a day off on holiday to do that if needs as she is now a farmers wife and they tend to be very busy. Also she works for an advertising company (US based), walks to and from work every day, possibly 5 miles, up and down hill (they are general small but annoying in the UK). I have always been in awe of her and know we would have been riotous friends in teen years if I had been born AFAB.

Whatever, that was never to be, so here I am, gorgeous and very much looking forwards to the future.

Im sure there is something I have forgotten but it will keep for later or another day.

Luv n Hugz

Katie

[pamelatransuk]

Katie

I am so glad you are feeling so well motivated upbeat and happy.

With regard to your comment on time, undoubtedly things have changed dramatically regarding trans matters over 40 years - I only wish I could have started in 1977 instead of 2017. The most significant change has IMHO happened over the last 10 years but we still have someway to do with general societal acceptance but we will get there!

I shall let you know about my laser treatment next week.

Hugs

Pamela

[Northern Star Girl]

@Katie Jade
Dear Katie:
Thank you for posting you latest detailed and comprehensive update regarding your recent life endeavors.  I love reading about the day to day events in yours and in other's lives. 

It is refreshing to hear that you are not totally consumed and overwhelmed by your transition details...  you have to take care of things in your everyday life as well and it is nice for me to read about those "regular" every day things that you are involved in.

All in all, your update was a positive statement of how you are dealing with life... kudos to you.

Thank you for keeping your followers tuned into your progress.
Hugs and well wishes,
Danielle

[Katie Jade]

@Katie Jade
Dear Katie:
Thank you for posting you latest detailed and comprehensive update regarding your recent life endeavors.  I love reading about the day to day events in yours and in other's lives. 

It is refreshing to hear that you are not totally consumed and overwhelmed by your transition details...  you have to take care of things in your everyday life as well and it is nice for me to read about those "regular" every day things that you are involved in.

All in all, your update was a positive statement of how you are dealing with life... kudos to you.

Thank you for keeping your followers tuned into your progress.
Hugs and well wishes,
Danielle

Katie

I am so glad you are feeling so well motivated upbeat and happy.

With regard to your comment on time, undoubtedly things have changed dramatically regarding trans matters over 40 years - I only wish I could have started in 1977 instead of 2017. The most significant change has IMHO happened over the last 10 years but we still have someway to do with general societal acceptance but we will get there!

I shall let you know about my laser treatment next week.

Hugs

Pamela

Dear Pamela
Thanks for your comments, and I hope your laser treatment goes well and isn't too painful as it can be for some. Make sure you are scrupulously clean before and after, I certainly found that I was prone to touching my face too much afterwards, and really had to take care not to touch any itches without a comprehensive hand cleaning ritual, or I would get an infection. Im sure you know this anyway.

Looking forwards to hearing your laser progress 

Dear Danielle
Thanks again for your comments. Yes I sometimes think I put too much mundane stuff in my posts, but its all important to me, and as you say sometimes it seems like in not totally engrossed by my transition, but I am really, still thinking about it every minute of every day, but its with a good positive out look, and more yearning for progress as opposed to fearing being found out, and the associated negative feeling that I'm sure we have all had.

Anyway back to my bits.
A few items today. Went to see youngest and helped him with his 'A' - Level maths revision (these exams are taken at 17/18 years old and are the primary qualifications for getting into University). He has another year of study left and has a way to go, so I will have to support more over the next 9 months.
Another cousin emailed me to wish me luck on my recent life decisions and to take it carefully, and he's looking forwards to meeting his new cousin Katie. Which was sweet of him.
So I got bored this afternoon and started to look for an outfit to meet the Susan's UK girls in next months, so here are a couple of pics for one outfit. As I'm not sure what the agenda is for the evening ill hedge my bets as I need something that can go to a pub/restaurant but also be up-jazzed to something more suited to partying maybe, I don't know. This is just a skirt and top combo, low heeled boots  and a pretty scarf that can be stowed if necessary. The top has small golden stud things and sparkles a bit in the right lights. I like sparkles a lot nowadays for some reason



Finally I went Veg today, with Cauliflower cheese (for a change.. lol) with butter fried onion, courgettes and mushrooms with ample ground pepper. It was absolutely gorgeous and will cook that again. Finished off with the last of this weekends Strawberries, mmm


Anyway, I see to be getting slightly more adventurous with my food, but still relatively somple. Now all I need to do is the try and get it all in one cooking pan... MY kitchen looked a state after cooking for one person. Nvm it was worth it.

Back to work tomorrow (Today being a bank holiday)

Luv n Hugz

Katie..

[davina61]

All right for some a Bank Hols off, cooking looks good and you should see my washing up after some of my curry adventures. Working on 3 outfits for Sept, skirt, tights top/blouse and jacket (my posh setup) dress for night and jeans to go back home. Hotel room so have time/chance to change.