I chose my real name (instead of the one my parents chose for me) when I was like 15. I had always known about me, earliest memories of anything amiss with my gender was around 5 and I was openly talking about my feelings with my mom when I was around 10. I never really thought too much about names then, just whether I was a sin or crazy or something. An incident with my dad caused me to bury myself and any expression of my real gender ceased to be displayed.
As I entered high school, I started to express myself a little here and there. My friends maybe thought I was gay or something, but I never really discussed my GD issues. I had a close friend, Wendy, with whom chit chatting was totally normal...then one day while we are bantering about a movie, she stops what she is doing and suddenly exclaims, "OMG, I just figured it out...you're a chick!". I was stunned! How did she figure it out? Am I that obvious? Who else knows? What should I do?
In that moment I decided there is no reason to hide from her...I feel safe to tell her my deepest and darkest secret. She listened and after I finished off what I needed to say, she called to order a meeting of the chick clique. We all agreed if I am a girl, I need a girl name. We set out to find one that fit me. After many hundreds of rejected proposals, I finally uttered Katie. All of us mulled it for a few seconds and then it became obvious that name was ME.
That name was from a distant memory, when my family lived in Costa Mesa...so I have to have been under 6 years old. A family friend (still so to this day) was brushing my hair and had me in a dress in the guest room. She felt like a big sister as she was a few years older than me. Her name was Katie and the memory was pretty vivid to me. I remember thinking that I was actually her little sister.
Anyway, at 15 my name was chosen and for a year or so I used it a lot among my close friends. Even when I was deep cover as a guy, the name stuck (just spelled it different). I even started my own small business in the mid 90's utilizing it, though on the surface it was just initials.
I guess my point is, sometimes we have our name the whole time and when it is presented outwardly...the right one will often just click with not only ourselves but our peers as well.