Hello young friend. I'll try to answer some of your questions because I know how anxious these things can be but of course, YMMV.
Quote from: Julia1996 on August 02, 2018, 09:04:48 AM
Does the first time hurt?
The first time might hurt and may be awkward and uncomfortable and you're likely to be anxious about things and being nervous never helps. The hundred and first time might hurt or neither time might hurt? It all just depends and factors may vary from one experience to the next. Personally speaking, I would have been nowhere near ready to try at 3 months but then again, I didn't have a willing and caring partner to experiment with either.
General suggestions would be to go slow, use lubrication and to maybe be on top. Being in that position allows you to have more control and go at your own pace until you've scoped things out and are comfortable. On the lube thing, you'll have to figure out if you need it (I do), how much and what kind. IMO, KY Jelly and the like maybe fine for dilating but are sub-optimal for sex. I prefer something less gummy and more liquidy and more natural. You'll only be able to figure out what works best for you through experimentation. It may be awkward and unsexy but if you do need lube, keep it handy like tucked under your pillow or something in case you need it during the course of things. Lack of natural lubrication is the only thing I don't like about my vagina. It's a little less embarrassing now that I am old because a lot of women my age have the same problem. If you aren't wet enough or dry out in the middle of, sex will hurt and probably not be too good for your body.
QuoteI have been dilating regularly but I don't have near enough depth to take all of Tristan. Actually I don't even know if I ever will. Tristan is 2 inches shy of being 9 inches.
Are you using the Soul Source dilators and if so which one? Speaking again personally, I'd be a bit apprehensive about intercourse unless I could accommodate the #4 big orange one, but that's just me. I dilate with the #4 and kind of like sex, sometimes it is uncomfortable and sometimes it is not. Whatever you're using, you may want to be well dilated before sex at least until you figure out how things work. Tristan is a big boy.
QuoteWhat I want to know is does a guy have to be able to get all of it in to enjoy sex and orgasm? Even if I can't take his whole dick I at least want it to be pleasurable for him and I want him to get off.
Women like us aren't the only ones that may lack depth. They make devices a man can wear on his penis that limits his depth but still gives him the sensation of full deep penetration. I have no personal experience with these products. You can always wrap your hand around the base of him to limit depth. With experience, you'll figure these things out.
Now here's where I get preachy. I completely understand the need to give your partner a pleasurable experience and the reward that goes along with that but this doesn't mean ignore or sacrifice your own enjoyment. You are more than just a hole for him to get off in. Learn how your body works and what feels good for you. Masturbate and figure out what gets you off then show him or play together until you both figure it out. Guys want to have the same satisfaction of pleasing their partner that we have. 85% of women do not have orgasm through intercourse alone without clitoral stimulation so train your fingers or his where to touch you or where not to touch you if direct clitoral stimulation is too intense. All I'm saying is that sex is what you make it and to not sell yourself short or think it's all about him. No pun intended but screw that.
QuoteWhen he ejaculates what should I do afterwards.
Go pee, which you should always do after sex, cuddle, go to sleep and don't worry about it.
QuoteAnd finally, should I expect any bleeding after the first time?
You might a little? I wouldn't be overly concerned about it if you do. Final piece of advice: relax, have fun and laugh.
You're always welcome to message me if you want to talk more.
