Hi

[Sam1066]

Hi! I started reading here a few months ago after questioning my gender which has been a process for the last 3 years, I'm in my mid thirties now and live in the western US.

I decided to take the plunge and sign up to join the conversation, maybe get some feedback?

My name isn't Sam, but similar and equally androgynous (thankfully, because I like my name), If I recall correctly Sam is the name I would have been given had I been born female, and it's also androgynous, and my only sibling's name is also androgynous, so I guess it's a trend  .

What I'm here for is mostly to figure myself out, answer the "is it in my head" question, that stuff.

Anyway,
Cheers!

[GingerVicki]

Welcome

[V M]

Hi Sam 

Welcome to Susan's Place    Glad to have you here, join on in the fun

Here are some links to the site rules and stuff that we offer to all new members to help them along

Things that you should read

Site Terms of Service & Rules to Live By	Standard Terms & Definitions	Post Ranks (including when you can upload an avatar)	Cautionary Note
Reputation rules	News posting & quoting guidelines	Photo, avatars, & signature images policy	Membership Agreement

Hugs

V M

[Northern Star Girl]

Hi! I started reading here a few months ago after questioning my gender which has been a process for the last 3 years, I'm in my mid thirties now and live in the western US.

I decided to take the plunge and sign up to join the conversation, maybe get some feedback?

My name isn't Sam, but similar and equally androgynous (thankfully, because I like my name), If I recall correctly Sam is the name I would have been given had I been born female, and it's also androgynous, and my only sibling's name is also androgynous, so I guess it's a trend  .

What I'm here for is mostly to figure myself out, answer the "is it in my head" question, that stuff.

Anyway,
Cheers!

@Sam1066 
Dear Sam   
I see that our lovely member  @V M  has already welcomed you but please allow me to also warmly WELCOME you to Susan's Place

Thank you for coming here to the Introductions Forum and posting your introduction.   I am glad that you have become a member of Susan's Place.
I am thinking that you may lots more questions and concerns, this is the right place for you to be to find out what others have done that may have been in your circumstances.
Be aware that there are a lot of members here that can identify with your situation..
   
You will find this a safe and friendly place to share with others  and to read about others similar trials, tribulations, and successes.
It is nice that you had signed up so you can share with others and involve yourself with some give and take with other like-minded members.
When frustrated or if you have successes you can share it here if you wish and receive support from others and offer support to others. ....

***It's a very good chance that you might find that you will make some new friends here. 

Please come in and continue to be involved at your own pace. 
Included in the LINKS that  V M  posted below her early welcome message to you there is information about the site that will help you navigate around and best utilize the features here.   
Please look closely at the LINKS in RED, answers are there to many questions that new members ask.

Again, Welcome to Susan's Place.
Danielle

[Tatiana 79]

Hello Sam
Welcome to one of the best places you could have possibly come to to find the answers to your questions.
I believe you'll find the combined knowledge here is staggering and you will have everyone's experience as your personal asset once you start to engage a little deeper.
I'm glad you have been checking this place out for a few months before you decided to take the plunge, so you already have a general idea of what occurs here.

My question to you would be did you have these gender related questions starting a few years ago while you were in your early thirties or did you have these feelings from a very young age?
Most  of us here that are in your situation have had these feelings while we were very young, but not everyone.
Most of us were born this way and had no choice whatsoever regarding our gender identity.
Our gender identity that comes from deep within does not conform to our environment.
The gender malleability theories have long  been discounted.
Being transgender, as a MTF is a little bit like being pregnant either you are pregnant or you're not. There are situations of gender fluidity but I did not get that from you but sorry if I got that wrong
If you really want to explore this question more I would throw it out on the transexual forum but in the MTF sub-forum. I'm sure there would be plenty of members there to help you work out your feelings. I personally am relatively new here also possessing only limited trans knowledge, some of the more experienced members here could provide far more than I can.  but I'm willing to give it a shot as is everyone else to help you work it out.
By the way that's what everyone does here is help each other out so short of a one-on-one contact with a gender therapist this is the next best place possibly even a little better.
We have all had that question, if it's all in our heads or not is it some kind of cycle or phase or is it for real.
I know that you'll figure yourself out once you get going and engage other members opinions,  which I believe will occur in a pretty short amount of time, due to the caring and loving nature of everyone here.

I most sincerely hope you find the answers to the questions you seek. All the very best to your future.
   Love Tatiana

[Northern Star Girl]

@Tatiana 79
Dear Tatiana:
Thank you very much for composing your very comprehensive thoughts in response to the questions and concerns that @Sam1066 expressed in their introduction post.
   
You were very thoughtful and kind to take the time to write a helpful and encouraging reply.
Hugs,
Danielle

[Tatiana 79]

Thanks Danielle
Very much appreciated dear.

[Sam1066]

Thanks for the warm and loving welcome @Tatiana 79. I don't know if I'm going to be much help to anyone at this point, but hopefully I can give back as well . If you ever need someone to tell you that you're a valid human I'm your person . (and heaven forbid I take my own advice)

For me I started questioning when I was about thirty. After I started questioning, a few years in I started remembering little signs from when I was younger. Then, one day, I was on my way home and it hit me, I remembered that for at least a solid year as a kid I wished deeply that I had been born the opposite sex, this was squashed out of fear, and promptly forgotten. That day was quite a shock, I started seeing a therapist soon after that.

[Tatiana 79]

Hello Sam
I'm so glad you responded back
Please don't think even for a minute that you can't be much help to anyone. That's what I also thought at first like I said I'm pretty new here myself, but little by little after engaging others I realized we're all human beings with different pasts and experiences that sometimes can be applied to help others. You sound like you got yourself pretty well together and I'm sure you can help others if you want in the future.
And yes there are many people, me among them sometimes that need someone to validate them as human.
See you already helped me a little and I'm sure you can do the same with others.

Do not think your story does not fit in the normal parameters of other members here. Everyone's story is different they are as varied as the amount of stars in the cosmos.
Now that you introduced yourself I think the next step would be to do the same in the forums. Because not many people find you here I would recommend transexual talk with the MTF sub-forum that's the little writing on the bottom under transexual talk. Here you will be among your own kind and be visible to all the members there. But take your time and explore all the forums I'm sure you'll find a place you like.
Everyone would really love to hear your story there and your experiences with your therapist. Because all of us have been there where you're at now we can definitely identify with your feelings were your at now.
But beware this website is quite a jewel and is quite addictive I originally came here just for some information and thought that was going to be all, but here I am still and probably will always be.
I would be just thrilled to help you in any way possible. I know you can't PM yet but if you had to you could ask another member to PM me if I ever needed. You will need 15 posts to be able to use the personal messaging system here.
I hope to see you in the forums someday.
Best wishes for your future
  Love Tatiana

[Alice V]

Please don't think even for a minute that you can't be much help to anyone. That's what I also thought at first like I said I'm pretty new here myself, but little by little after engaging others I realized we're all human beings with different pasts and experiences that sometimes can be applied to help others.

This. Yeah be sure to talk with people and you'll eventually help somebody I think I already was helpful though I even didn't have transition experience. We're humans at the first place, and sometimes we don't need any special TG support but sharing regular human experience. Any advices can be counted, don't underestimate yourself.