Quote from: Katie on October 13, 2018, 08:01:23 PM
When people here talk about getting a female voice I smile often because quite frankly one of the best ways to get a reasonable voice is to actually go full time IN THE REAL WORLD not around other trans people. When ->-bleeped-<- is real a person will try a hell of a lot harder. Add to that vocal surgery and many people can have a dam nice voice.
Of course you can see all the excuses under the sun for not doing this or that, i have to remind myself the world is filled with those that do and those that dont...............
Yes. There are a lot of transitioners who will occasionally try to practice their female voice, but who constantly drop back to their male voice, in private, in support groups, with family, etc. "It's hard... I don't need it with friends/family..."
Here's the thing. We are creatures of habit, with lots of things that have 'default' states. We have our default behaviors, default mannerisms, and these include our default voices. The only way to change our default states to something new is to practice, practice, practice what we want the default to be, and never, ever go back to the old settings we are trying to get rid of.
If we don't change the default state for many of our mannerisms, including voice, then when we are not concentrating on mannerisms or voice, we are very likely to slip back to the old default, a more masculine walk or stance, that male voice, even behavior like 'mansplaining'. In a culture with a strong gender binary, this quickly 'outs' us when we slip, and that can have unpleasant consequences.
(Yes, I am familiar with arguments that we should just 'be ourselves' to somehow become more accepted. Perhaps, in a few generations, that might even have an effect on the broader culture. I need to live my life now, though.)
I practice my voice and movement 24/7, and have been doing this for the entire time I have been full-time. I am fortunate in having a voice range that could be exercised to include a normal female range, and in having had access to a speech therapist for several months to coach me. Currently, I use a set of apps on my phone to monitor the daily pitch exercises I still run through, as well as checking the speaking range I use when reciting from texts, as when i teach a course or am doing a presentation.
I've been at this constantly for two years, and feel that my feminine voice is finally becoming my default voice, and I am able to speak and lecture in the proper pitch range. Over this time, my prosody has improved from constantly conversing with friends i've made the past two years, women who learned prosody the old fashioned way, being raised with it. I've picked up quite a bit of this from immersion in the broader culture of women.
I personally consider this the real purpose of my Real Life Experience, the immersion in the feminine side of my culture and my learning to just be one of the girls, in manner, speech, and other aspects of my gender presentation. I'm still me, of course, but have been working very hard to fit in and be seen as just another woman. I want to avoid accidentally outing myself by inappropriate default behaviors showing when I am distracted.
Two years on, and I am finally seeing the light at the end of the tunnel. It takes time to replace decades of old behaviors, old patterns of speech and vocalization. I'm getting there.
(This is turning into another whole article. I'm cutting myself off here before I need to start chapters...)
