Decided to drop the health services and carve my own path

[jaybutterfly]

As some may be aware, I have had some pretty rough times of it at late with the Gender Identity services in the UK. I have decided with a lot of thinking, that this is not the path I want, nor a reasonable service to follow. I have found that there are a lot of things I need to do for myself first, and that the services cannot provide me with gamete storage or counselling from what my questioning has pulled up.

This is not what I want right now, and frankly, my life is a little too crazy at the moment to even be accepted on the care-path to transition. What I have decided to do is plan out what I need to do first (store my sperm, go to counselling for some of my other problems in my life, with gender being in there too) and definitely get some stability in my situation BEFORE going privately. Yes, it might mean I have to put up with a few things and tolerate my dysphoria, but I have some things in my life that allow me to do so. I have a girlfriend whose bi and loves me for who I am. I have friends who go out with me when I present female, I have a family that... well, they dont understand I suppose, but in time they will have to come around or there will be changes when I move out. Right now, getting out of this house and into my own one is the top priority.

I have a support network and a timeline in place for where I want to be, and wherever I end up, I'm confidant it will be ok. I've been to some extremely dark places before and come out surviving. I'll get where I want to be, even if it takes a long time

[Alice (nym)]

Sounds like you've already made a huge step in recognising you have other problems and issues that need sorting first.

Some of the advice I've been receiving is that transition will not solve any problems like employment, loneliness, etc. etc. these things will still be there afterwards. So try and solve through any issues beforehand. Sounds like good advice to me, and it sounds like you are going to be just fine.

Stick around though... there's quite a bit of support and helpful posts on these forums... and some pretty amazing people too.

[jaybutterfly]

Sounds like you've already made a huge step in recognising you have other problems and issues that need sorting first.

Some of the advice I've been receiving is that transition will not solve any problems like employment, loneliness, etc. etc. these things will still be there afterwards. So try and solve through any issues beforehand. Sounds like good advice to me, and it sounds like you are going to be just fine.

Stick around though... there's quite a bit of support and helpful posts on these forums... and some pretty amazing people too.

Yeah, I still have my identity, and I feel there are people here who I at least relate to or can talk to. It's a cool community, so Im not going anywhere

[pamelatransuk]

Hello again Jaybutterfly

I have followed your story and we have corresponded previously.

I am sure you have made the right decision ultimately to go private for transgender care after finding a house for yourself and addressing other matters. I can see you have planned well.

I wish you happiness now and in the future.

Hugs

Pamela