Dealing with not having a waist

[Lunarite]

Background: still presenting male, hoping to shift more female.
Physique: skinny.

I finally went shopping to get a feel for what clothing size I'm meant to aim for. Nothing adventurous. Skinny jeans and roll-neck jumpers. When I saw myself in the mirror, I looked about as male as ever.
Tight-ish tops are comfortable, but just show my torso up as being flat, waist-less. I am not broad-chested/shouldered, for a man*, but it seemed perhaps more obvious.
I deliberately chose high-ish-waisted jeans, but without the right waist/hips they sit lower than I expected, not much higher than my regular mid-waist men's jeans. They could be pulled up higher, but they wouldn't stay that way, and it would cause some, er, comfort issues.

Obviously I am far from alone in this predicament. Does anyone have any advice for how to deal with being fairly lacking in the waist (and hips) department? I'm aiming for fairly plain, androgyne. I'd thought my choices were fairly safe bets.
Although I'd kind of rather go with women's clothing, I'd be open to maybe sticking with men's for now if only higher waists were a thing - I've found most men's skinny jeans seem to emphasise the shoulder/chest width.
And, yeah, I realise potential advice may well be that I should get used to the less changeable parts of my body shape.

*I know I should count my blessings, but it is irritating that being at the smallest end on the men's scale is still way up at the top (skeletally, that is) of the women's.

[Maid Marion]

Women wear tight jeans.  So, if you want to pass, you need to do the same.  You may want to try Levis men's/boy's 519 stretch jeans.  You can also try jeans for misses/juniors.

Jeans with whiskers or white horizontal patches will give the illusion of having a wider bottom.

I do a of lower body exercise.  It could also be genetics, but my hips are just as wide as my shoulders.  And they have been even wider when I carried more weight.

Now that I wear routinely wear women's tops that fit snugly,  I can't roll up my sleeves.  So, I either have to wear boy clothes or take off my shirt to get a flu shot.

[Angela H]

I'm far from an expert, but I thought I'd share the advice I've gotten and what works for me.

To draw attention away from your shoulders v-necks are useful. Especially with a pattern or a necklace to draw the eye inward to your chest. I like to wear long sleeves, especially poofy ones, because they hide how muscular my arms are.

To give the illusion of hips, a-line or flare skirts work really well. Bright colors can (supposedly) draw the eye and make your hips look bigger than they are.

Also, a lot of women really like padded underwear. I've tried it, but it just wasn't for me.

I'd recommend just trying a lot of different items and seeing what you think you look good in. Good luck 

[CindyLouFromCO]

You should get a S curve with a smaller waste after 2.5 years of a good puberty level HRT regiment.  By year 3 and 4 you should have a skinny waste.  The side muscles go away or get smaller and fat should not distribute there.

If you're skinny you will probably look great in the waste in a few years.

I wore tops that king of hung off of my breast for a few years.  shirts and sweaters that went below my hips.  You can wear leggings with them also.  You can still look petite.  It's winter now so plenty of options.  Look for
tops that expose the upper chest area, like V and U necks.

[Jessica]

What Cindy Lou says can be true.  I too had a body that measured the same at hips, waist and chest and after a bit more than a year on hrt has changed that.  My bust increased by 2", my band dropped 5", my waist dropped 3", my hips increased by 2".  But I must caution the ymmv (your mileage may vary) is in effect here.  Your personal genetics play a major part in how these medications can affect you and everyone is unique.  A dear friend that started the same day I did, has seen no changes.  So if you are on hrt medications, look to your mother or your sister to see the possibilities.

One note to add on accessories, a high waisted belt does wonders.

Hugs and smiles from a California girl

[Maid Marion]

Yes, a lot of GGs wear a belt to give the illusion of having a waist.

Diet and exercise allowed me to go from 32-28-33 (my 40s) to 32-26-32 (my 50s).  Which is likely to be as it good as it gets without HRT.

[GingerVicki]

Yes, a lot of GGs wear a belt to give the illusion of having a waist.

Diet and exercise allowed me to go from 32-28-33 (my 40s) to 32-26-32 (my 50s).  Which is likely to be as it good as it gets without HRT.

Those are great stats. I waist train 4 or 5 hours a day.

[KathyLauren]

I agree with the advice above to wear flared skirts.  A generously-gathered skirt will give you a waist-hip differential even if none exists naturally, and will amplify any that you naturally have.

Patience, HRT, and diet/exercise will help define your waist over time. 

It also helps to practise controlling your posture.  Men typically have poor posture, compared to women.  We trans women have to re-learn how to hold our bodies.  Stand tall, head up, shoulders back, boobs out, gut sucked in.  Yes, it sounds like a drill-sergeant's instructions: that's why soldiers on parade have good posture.  Good posture will help feminize your shape (you want your gut to be smaller than your boobs!) and will also help you move in a more feminine manner.

[barbie]

I also have relatively small and lower hips. Mostly I wear skirts, but people used to praise my body shape when I was wearing stretchable jeans purchased at a Wal-mart store about 15 years ago. Even most women envied my tight butts.



After starting wearing skirts casually, I no longer worry about my hip size.



barbie~~



barbie~~

[Lunarite]

Lots of good things to remember!
For now I'm not even on HRT, still dressing and presenting male. I'm just hoping to move to something more androgyne. I didn't really make that clear!
I'll get myself a decent belt and try again, and check out the men's stretch jeans for good measure.
Might see if I can get away with a women's smart jacket, as they have a bit of a tailored waist going on - men's hang off me anyway.

It wasn't my intention to think about it, but this has made me really impatient for HRT now.

[Maid Marion]

from Dictionary.com
peplum
[pep-luh m]
ExamplesWord Origin
noun, plural pep·lums, pep·la [pep-luh] /ˈpɛp lə/.
a short full flounce or an extension of a garment below the waist, covering the hips.

What to wear if you are lacking in the hip department.