cox? I keep asking my doctor about this but she always says "The testicles can shrink". Figuratively I have the testicular fortitude of 10 men, it's just in a small package. I asked her for Viagra and she said that's not what its for but I can give you a few to try but your insurance won't pay for it. $10 a pill, that's like what street drugs cost that they sell right down the street in Baltimore and I KNOW those drugs do something at least, so negative on that route. Anyways so what the next best thing or better then real medical advice? Dr Google, I'll ask the internet if it is intended to diagnose, cure, treat, or prevent any disease.
Anyways my doc who is a trans specialist doesn't think its an issue but I'm getting worried in case I want SRS. I have been on HRT since feb of '18 off test since nov '17, I take estradiol and finasteride (Your not supposed to name doses? I think that's a rule so I won't name mg) I was always one of those guys who didn't have a very big one but it would get 6" long when needed "Grower not a shower" So after taking the HRT I could still masturbate about once a month it was not as big maybe 5" not as hard not as thick and all that would come out would be thin clear "precum" like solution. I guess that's normal "girl cumand girl penis"- which just doesn't sound right. But lately I NEVER have the urge to masturbate and I think I'm totally impotent. It's seriously 1" long and it seems recessed to the point where I kind of sit down when I pee. Shouldn't we, as transwomen, have the right to pee standing up? I don't think I want SRS but I want the option open incase my body really starts to look 95% female (The butt area is lacking and I think it would be weird to have a vagina before having a proper shapped butt, like when you see those transwoman get huge boobs but skip the smaller steps to look feminine, and <removed by moderator>).
I breifly went to an orientation group where the instructor would often say "You have to use it or you will lose it" but she didn't really like talking about her own transition and I was the most transitioned girl in there at three months. So I didn't learn much from experienced people. Hell I was the only one in the group besides the instructor that presented female. They were also all about using your female name which was weird when you are surrounded by a bunch of dudes. Anyways anecdotes aside how do you use it if you have no libito to get it started? I play with it but its like a limp noodle. Dont get me wrong I think it looks really cute as I'm going for the Sissyboy total obedience and domination/ subservient to men; so basically mines just for show. Too bad the only info is the "sissyboy" role I take in relationships and the internet is full of realistic sounding fantasy stories. Like did you know some trans girls that do bottom only porn get their testicles removed and the scrodum removed and sewn flat? Arousing yes, but I don't know if I like sex enough to go through that in real life. How do you have that kind of sex drive with 0 teststerone? Now you can have sex the way you always wanted but you no longer have the desire like some evil backwards catch 22.
I know I'm kind of ranting but I don't know much about this; for instance my goal in life is to be a house wife to a dominant (straight?) male husband where I'm the submissive so not having to come to orgasm since I can't ejaculate focuses me into a subservient role, the sex is done when he gets off as I can't get off. But why would I even want to have sex if I have no sex drive? Part of a healthy relationship with a man is going to involve his need for sex and healthy means both. The only way I could think to arouse myself would be to take that subservient master/sub role which is arousing to me. Are a lot of transwoman also into this and for once I'm not an outlier? Its so hard to use the internet to judge because sex is so objectified, I didn't even know the "s" or "t" words were derogatory until after I started HRT and attended group. Sorry for the long rant maybe others can pick out bits from this they share in common and I can learn something before it's too late. Maybe Viagra is for real.
