Denise's GCS Thread

[Denise]

From the beginning..
When I was 4 years old... oh, maybe not that far back

In October 2015 when I finally was overwhelmed with my dysphoria it mostly surrounded my chest.  I really needed breasts and I needed them badly.  FFS and GCS was not a concern in the first few months.  Then FFS became #1.  But through the first two years I kept an internal barometer of "will I or won't I get GCS".  It started out at about 5% chance then slowly went up to 20 then 25%.  BUT one day, I remember the exact instant.

I was sitting in the movie theatre with a few other friends (some trans, some not) watching "A Fantastic Woman".  When she walked into the men's locker room my barometer went from 25% to 100%.  I can't explain why, I have no idea.  But from that point on I knew I HAD to have the surgery.  On Monday I called the surgeon to start the ball rolling.

My surgeon selection was short.  I'm staying local in Chicago and the surgeon I go to uses a hospital 2 miles from my house.  I actually walked to my FFS.

The number one question I get is "am I excited/scared/worried/...?" and my response, up until this week has been "none of the above."  It was a non-emotional event.  I think the "I'm worried about post-surgery maintenance" enough to cancel out the excitedness of the actual result.

Over the last week or two the worry has diminished and the excited is coming to the top.  So right now I'm excited.

7 days!

[Claire]

Congratulations Denise! It's interesting how opening up a door can show you possibilities you've never expected! I glad you know who you are and where you need to be. I'll be following this thread and rooting for you all the way.
BTW, I saw you posted some photos in other threads and you look fabulous!


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[Northern Star Girl]

@Denise:
Dear Denise:
Thank you for starting your GCS thread... it will be nice for those of us interested in your next big event in your transition journey to follow along with you.

Ahhhh    7 DAYS   
the clock has started... tick tock tick tock

We, that follow you, will be almost as excited as you are.

Thank you again for starting your GCS thread.   
Please do know that it was great to see your journey and progress on your previous FFS thread.
I am so very happy for you.

Hugs
Danielle

[LizK]

From the beginning..
When I was 4 years old... oh, maybe not that far back

In October 2015 when I finally was overwhelmed with my dysphoria it mostly surrounded my chest.  I really needed breasts and I needed them badly.  FFS and GCS was not a concern in the first few months.  Then FFS became #1.  But through the first two years I kept an internal barometer of "will I or won't I get GCS".  It started out at about 5% chance then slowly went up to 20 then 25%.  BUT one day, I remember the exact instant.

I was sitting in the movie theatre with a few other friends (some trans, some not) watching "A Fantastic Woman".  When she walked into the men's locker room my barometer went from 25% to 100%.  I can't explain why, I have no idea.  But from that point on I knew I HAD to have the surgery.  On Monday I called the surgeon to start the ball rolling.

My surgeon selection was short.  I'm staying local in Chicago and the surgeon I go to uses a hospital 2 miles from my house.  I actually walked to my FFS.

The number one question I get is "am I excited/scared/worried/...?" and my response, up until this week has been "none of the above."  It was a non-emotional event.  I think the "I'm worried about post-surgery maintenance" enough to cancel out the excitedness of the actual result.

Over the last week or two the worry has diminished and the excited is coming to the top.  So right now I'm excited.

7 days!

Hi Claire

I too have just completed a GCS Countdown and I think from memory one of my last few posts last week talked about not being excited but calm and I even went on to say I thought there was something wrong with me for feeling that way.

So you sound a bit like me in that respect to your concerns. Speaking to other Post Op girls and they all pretty much said the "maintenance" turned out to be no real issue for them... I don't know what I expected but I know how I feel now.

Good luck with your surgery and I will be interested to see how well you go.

Liz


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[Denise]

Liz,

  Thanks for the info.  It actually helps.  I had not realized that others felt the same way - I'm not listening to my own rules.  Rule #1: If you think/feel/want/... something there are a thousand others who want the same.

The excitement is starting to catch up now.  I did my "Getting to Know Transgender" talk to a bunch of people yesterday an I talked a little bit about the surgery then there were follow up conversations with individuals who I gave TMI.  I find that talking about whatever is on my mind, even here on Susan's helps me to understand myself better. (Read some of my early posts, they were all over the place.)

I'm also glad to hear that the post-surgical care is not as bad as you expected.  I too expect to be pleasantly surprised because I'm expecting (or rather was expecting) HELL!  I've spoken with some post-ops in person who had difficulty with things going wrong.  I'm less worried.

6 days and counting.

P.S.  Rule number 2 is: No body cares and if they do then they are a no body.  (This does not apply to immediate family members!)

[Dorit]

Denis dear, this is wonderful and I certainly wish the best for you.   We are literally on the same page as I am scheduled to have GRS in Philadelphia on DEcember 14.  Would you mind telling me what day?   Being a day ahead of the US it is hard for me to relate to how many days left.

I too was deeply affected by the film "A Fantastic Woman"   When she was forced to expose her breasts before the police, they were just like mine after six months HRT.

May your surgery be without complications and your recovery smooth!

[Denise]

Surgery is scheduled for Thursday December 13 2018 at 7:30 am.  Weiss memorial hospital in Chicago Illinois with Dr Loren Schechter.

I wish you luck.  PM me when you are able.  I'll be a day ahead.  Maybe we can be V-twins and share stories.  I would enjoy that.

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[Denise]

I just left my parents place in Tampa.  I'm sitting in the airport waiting to go back into the freezer known as Chicago.

I flew down for the weekend to tell them of the pending surgery on Thursday.  They were understanding and concerned that their daughter was having major surgery.  I assured them the surgeon is awesome and I have a ton of local support.

My parents are wonderful and are accepting.  I would wish that for everyone here and I understand it's not and that breaks my heart.

Four days and counting
Monday: work, ice skating, Margarettas for dinner!

Tuesday: work in the morning, seeing me therapist in the afternoon, visiting a new Susan's friend who just had surgery with my surgeon 2 weeks ago

Wednesday: cleanse (YUCK), clean, bake cookies for the hospital staff (bribery works!)

Thursday: arrive at hospital at 5:30am!!! And sleep all day!


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[steph2.0]

I just left my parents place in Tampa.  I'm sitting in the airport waiting to go back into the freezer known as Chicago.

I flew down for the weekend to tell them of the pending surgery on Thursday.  They were understanding and concerned that their daughter was having major surgery.  I assured them the surgeon is awesome and I have a ton of local support.

My parents are wonderful and are accepting.  I would wish that for everyone here and I understand it's not and that breaks my heart.

Four days and counting
Monday: work, ice skating, Margarettas for dinner!

Tuesday: work in the morning, seeing me therapist in the afternoon, visiting a new Susan's friend who just had surgery with my surgeon 2 weeks ago

Wednesday: cleanse (YUCK), clean, bake cookies for the hospital staff (bribery works!)

Thursday: arrive at hospital at 5:30am!!! And sleep all day!

Go Denise! I wish I'd been in Florida to do lunch with you again. All the best on Thursday, and please report in when you can!



Stephanie

[KathyLauren]

Wow, your surgery date is coming up quickly!  Good luck with it!  I think your calm feeling is confirming that this is the right road for you.  Go, girl!

[Beverly Anne]

Yay, Denise! I'll be following your thread with great interest. I meet with my surgeon for the first time, long waiting list, January 11 and hope for surgery in July if planets and stars align. Best wishes!

[Northern Star Girl]

@Denise
Dear Denise:

4 DAYS and counting .... tick tock tick tock.

We are all rooting for you, we are your biggest fans!
Hugs,
Danielle

[JudiBlueEyes]

Great News Denise.  Its certainly getting close and I'm sure time will fly by!   Your Wednesday cleanse will soon be forgotten and you'll have new (more pleasant) memories.   Best wishes!

[LizK]

Hi Denise it will soon be here...Then the real fun starts...I Hope yours goes really well

Take care

Liz


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[Denise]

Thank you all for your words of encouragement.

@Beverly.Anne January 11 will be here faster than you know and July is flying to meet you.  Trust me, I've been there...


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[Beverly Anne]

Thank you all for your words of encouragement.

@Beverly.Anne January 11 will be here faster than you know and July is flying to meet you.  Trust me, I've been there...


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Thank you, Denise! I can't wait!

[Denise]

It's 4am two days prior to surgery, today is 1/2 day off work and therapy day.  Grocery shopping is on my agenda for non-perishables.

Tomorrow the fun begins.  Short term discomfort for long term gains.

Love you all

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[josie76]

Congrats Deise! I am excited for you. 

[mm]

Best of luck, Denise, hope you are back giving us great reports in a few days.

[Donica]

Wow Denise! Congratulations. Just 2 more days to go. I bookmarked your GCS thread. I am excited to follow you through your recovery. Thank you for sharing.

Hugs,
Donica.