Denise's GCS Thread

[LizK]

Douching is a strange feeling.  Especially with the betadine in the solution.  It looks like flat Coca-Cola going in and coming out all over the shower.

Tomorrow is dilation at home #1.  They told me to hold off today and start 3-a-days Friday.  Total time is 15-30 minutes.  You might want a TV and watch a show.



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Hi Denise

Congratulations on your progress. Having different surgeons makes for different dilation regimes. I started at day 8 and I have no idea if it's better to start early or later but a couple of things spring to mind...having an empty bowel and bladder will make things easier and the biggest thing I had to keep telling myself was to relax, the more relaxed I am the "easier" things were...much easier said than done lol Good luck I am sure you will be fine.

Take care

Liz


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[echo7]

Now that you are dilating, can I ask how much depth you have?  And did the surgeon use a skin graft to extend the depth?  If so, where did he harvest the skin graft from?

[Dorit]

Denise, I am only one day behind you and my recovery is so much slower.   You are out and about, I have not left the recovery apartment of the surgeon.   I did a modified and I still have swelling and pain, I can sit up but only for short periods, otherwise I am on my back still all day.   Maybe it is my age, the reason is really not important.   I couldn't be happier with the results, and I am healing at my own pace.

Love you!

[Linde]

Denise, I am only one day behind you and my recovery is so much slower.   You are out and about, I have not left the recovery apartment of the surgeon.   I did a modified and I still have swelling and pain, I can sit up but only for short periods, otherwise I am on my back still all day.   Maybe it is my age, the reason is really not important.   I couldn't be happier with the results, and I am healing at my own pace.

Love you!

Some people heal faster than others.  Age is not such a big component herewith.  I had carpal tunnel surgery done when i was about your age, and I healed from this in no time. I had the other hand done 5 years earlier, but the healing was as quick with the second one as it was with the first one.
I tend to be a fast healer, no idea why.   

[Rachel]

Hi Denise, I had a 5 30 minute dilation schedule a day for the first 3 months then 3 sessions a day for 3 months then twice a day for 6 months and once a day after. I am over 2 years post op and I know woman that went to the same surgeon and dilate once a week. I never misses a dilation.

Anyhow dilation is boring but very important. Remember to apply the recommended pressure the whole time. It is easy to do something on the cell phone or watch TV and reduce the pressure.

You will be ready for the beach the summer

[Denise]

Now that you are dilating, can I ask how much depth you have?  And did the surgeon use a skin graft to extend the depth?  If so, where did he harvest the skin graft from?

Depth is undetermined.  I can take the full yellow and orange.  Then I asked the PA in the office she went digging and couldn't reach the top.  And trust me, she went all the way +++ in and couldn't reach the end.

My surgeon, Loren Schechter, here in Chicago, did miracles.  My male genitalia was such that I never needed to tuck.  I was a grower and had shrunk about 50% on HRT in the past two years.  No grafts.  He used only penile and scrotal materials.  He's a magician and I'm very pleased, so far.  In a few months I'll talk about sensation.  But for now most of the area is still numb.  The nerve endings are just reestablishing themselves.

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[Denise]

Denise, I am only one day behind you and my recovery is so much slower.   You are out and about, I have not left the recovery apartment of the surgeon.   I did a modified and I still have swelling and pain, I can sit up but only for short periods, otherwise I am on my back still all day.   Maybe it is my age, the reason is really not important.   I couldn't be happier with the results, and I am healing at my own pace.

Love you!

Dorit, just a note, I'm about to turn 57.  I'm in pretty good physical health. (Some label me as athletic, I don't think so but okay.  We are out worst critics.)

Everyone heals at their own pace.  My superhero power is my healing ability; it's genetic.

I'm post-op day +17 and today I:
* 10 minutes on the elliptical
* Followed by climbing 16 flights of stairs (slowly)
* Went to the movies (Spiderman)
* Then we l went to a Mexican restaurant where one margherita will put you away. (Which I'm feeling now.)

Everyone heals and recovers from major surgery differently.

Go at your own pace. You drive you're own destiny.

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[Denise]

Hi Denise, I had a 5 30 minute dilation schedule a day for the first 3 months then 3 sessions a day for 3 months then twice a day for 6 months and once a day after. I am over 2 years post op and I know woman that went to the same surgeon and dilate once a week. I never misses a dilation.

Anyhow dilation is boring but very important. Remember to apply the recommended pressure the whole time. It is easy to do something on the cell phone or watch TV and reduce the pressure.

You will be ready for the beach the summer

At this point I'm just inserting and waiting.  I'm not using the hard plastic ones yet.  Those take some concentration and finesse.  Right now I'm responding to messages.  (Umm literally right now. [emoji39][emoji39])

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[Donica]

It sounds like everything is moving along well Denise! Congratulations! I hope everything goes this well for me. I too have shrunk at least 50% and no longer need to tuck.

Happy New Year girl!!!
Donica.

[AnneK]

I too have shrunk at least 50%

Another thing for me to look forward to, when I start hormones.  I can't wait to get started!

[Northern Star Girl]

@Denise
Dear Denise:
I have so much enjoyed your updates as you continue on in your journey.   
Your positive reports and photos describing your recent surgeries have been inspiring to all that read your threads.
Thank you for feeling free to share your life events with all of us.

Obviously some bumps in the road that all of us experience so continue to hang on for an exciting ride.
 
I am so very happy that I found you and your thread on the Forums this last year and I will be eagerly following your upcoming reports and updates in the New Year in 2019.

Wishing you a very HAPPY NEW YEAR  in 2019...

Hugs and as always, well wishes.

Danielle

[Denise]

@Alaskan.danielle thank you for the kind words.

Update day +19
Sleeping is challenging.  The nerves are starting to wake up.  I'm not sure if it's just on schedule or if it's the dilation that's doing it. 

I'm a little sore and it's keeping me up or waking me up at night. Phantom pains are real but diminishing.

The whole area feels tight.  It's like I need a good stretch or deep massage (NOT HAPPENING!)

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[Denise]

Post op Day 21

The term for today is phantom pains.  This is the difficult part, for a year I was blissfully unaware of my male bits.  But now I'm feeling phantom pains that I'm constantly reminded of my male parts.  Even though they are "gone" I'm feeling their nerves firing randomly.

Hopefully the nerves reattach and I can figure where everything is reattached.  It's strange.

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[Northern Star Girl]

@Denise
Dear Denise:
Hang in their girl....   healing takes time and eventually these difficulties will slowly go away...
... it is a strange thing about phantom pains....  your nerves keep sending signals to you brain about pain in places that there are no places any longer... 

Time and healing will eventually help solve that....   
PATIENCE, rest and eventually things will heal.
Thank you for posting and sharing and keeping your followers tuned in to your life events.

Hugs and best wishes...
Danielle

Post op Day 21

The term for today is phantom pains.  This is the difficult part, for a year I was blissfully unaware of my male bits.  But now I'm feeling phantom pains that I'm constantly reminded of my male parts.  Even though they are "gone" I'm feeling their nerves firing randomly.

Hopefully the nerves reattach and I can figure where everything is reattached.  It's strange.

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[Dorit]

Being only one day apart I can so much identify with what you are going through.   I can only share what my surgeon told me; that our bodies have a remarkable ability to heal and that this is a three to six month process.   Be kind and patient with yourself.   You are a peach!

[Denise]

Being only one day apart I can so much identify with what you are going through.   I can only share what my surgeon told me; that our bodies have a remarkable ability to heal and that this is a three to six month process.   Be kind and patient with yourself.   You are a peach!

Thanks Dorit.

I've been taking pictures of the surgical area twice per day since I got home.  It's interesting to see the changes over time.

*** Warning graphic description to follow ***

BUT last night I got the freakout of my life.  A large portion of the surgical area is numb.  And when I looked at last night's picture I thought I saw two issues.
1 - I thought I pulled all the stitches out right below the vaginal opening
2 - it appeared to be all black puss like a huge infection.

Those two things combined with some new discomfort (actual pain and for me that's saying a lot) had me contacting the Dr office at 9:15 last night.  5 minutes later I got an email back requesting I send pictures.
15 minutes after that I was given the okay to dilate, it looked okay to the Drs but come in at 11:00 tomorrow (which was today).

I went over a bunch of issues I was having.  All explained as normal.  But the phantom pains was an interesting discussion.  They said a few patients had mentioned it but most don't.   So now they're wondering if people are not saying anything or are they not realizing what the sensations are.

The other thing I realized is the pain I'm having now (three weeks of constant reminding of my crotch) has set me back months (a year?) on my mental transition.  I used to just ignore my bits but between the phantom pains and the constant reminder that I just fixed things it's a mental set back.

The Drs agreed that once things settle down the transformation will quickly get back on track.

Thanks for continued reading.

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[Donica]

We are all still here Denise! We are behind you 100%. I glad to hear your said everything is ok. Let us know what he says today? Hang in there. Speedy recovery girl!!!

Hugs,
Donica.

[Rachel]

Hi Denise,

GCS has stages to it. Just remember it is normal and everyone handles it differently. Remember to do something nice for yourself every once and a while and be kind to yourself. Remember to check the negatives and focus on the positives.

I never had phantom pains. I had pain from nerves reconnecting and major pain when all the scar tissue I had contracted at month 3 on. I got through that and had a major revision. My next and final no matter what revision is in April.

I had some depression hit when it all came to settle in. Maybe it was from lack of hormones. Maybe it was finally climbing to the top of the mountain and realizing I now needed to fine my new normal. No more if, but now what do I do.

Awesome you have great depth. Awesome you are recovering well. Take it easy on yourself. Remember to eat well and get your rest. No comment on the alcohol. What ever you do, do not smoke anything.

[JanePlain]

Post op Day 21

The term for today is phantom pains.  This is the difficult part, for a year I was blissfully unaware of my male bits.  But now I'm feeling phantom pains that I'm constantly reminded of my male parts.  Even though they are "gone" I'm feeling their nerves firing randomly.

Hopefully the nerves reattach and I can figure where everything is reattached.  It's strange.

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When I had my orchiectomy my pain doctor said that numbing the testes even tho I would be knocked out was thought to possibly help avoid phantom pains.  The theory is that the surgery to amputate them still fires pain signals to the brain without them being numbed and the brain can be zapped so strongly that it can be influenced to "play back."    *I'm saying this all wrong but hopefully I'm saying it well enough to be explainable.

[Denise]

When I had my orchiectomy my pain doctor said that numbing the testes even tho I would be knocked out was thought to possibly help avoid phantom pains.  The theory is that the surgery to amputate them still fires pain signals to the brain without them being numbed and the brain can be zapped so strongly that it can be influenced to "play back."    *I'm saying this all wrong but hopefully I'm saying it well enough to be explainable.

But in this case phantom pains after very very good.  You want them.  You need to teach the mind that when your left testicle itches, it's actually the xxxx of your new anatomy.

So I welcome them but it's still a learning process.  One thing that helps is to explore the new design.  Feel around and associate the feelings with where you're touching.

It's slow since there's a lot of very sensitive tissue down there.  I've waited 50 years, I can wait a few more months.

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