Dysphoria blows, I feel like a chipmunk trying to be hulk hogan

[ftmblues]

I've been feeling so poorly about myself. I work out and I'm gaining some muscle but my arms are so small and my body is so squishy and curvy. I'm 5'4, making me shorter than all of the men in my life, and half of the women. I mosh and I sing and I try to carry heavy things for people when they need to be carried but I just can't shake the feeling that I'm just this really pathetic, weak thing trying to be a man.

I don't really know what to do. This whole thing seems really negative, and I kind of feel guilty for posting it, but I really need to get it off my chest and this is the best place to do that. I don't really know what to do or how to feel better about myself.

[Dena]

Being a man isn't about your appearance, how big you are or how strong you are. It's about who you are mentally and that can vary from person to person. My role model for a male was my father. He worked to provide for the family. He was there to encourage us to develop our own interests. He didn't force his ideas on us but helped us to explore ours. He treated others with respect even when he disagreed with them. There are many other things about him and though he passed away almost 30 years ago, I still will draw on a memory of him when making a decision today.

Look beyond the physical aspects of the men in your life and find the best features about them. Try to incorporate those ideas into your personality and you will become a man that others will respect.

[Devlyn]

Audie Murphy was 5' 5"

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Audie_Murphy

[Kylo]

Most cis guys couldn't be like Hulk Hogan, it's not unique to you or to trans men. Just ask the average ectomorphic cis guy who can't build muscle, or the endomorph cis guy trying to look athletic. There are a lot of them.

Don't be so desperate to compensate. The world is filled with men like that and everyone knows they're not what they think they are. Stands out a mile off and it just looks sad. What a "real man" is? Confident, secure in himself regardless of his size or body type. No reason not to pursue good fitness and a better physique but there's a reason why there are derisive stereotypes associated with shorter guys, including nervousness and aggression/over-compensation. Throw it out the window, own your life and don't give a crap whether you "measure up" to anyone else.

[Maid Marion]

I really am different. AMAB.  I'm shorter than you and have always had a positive outlook on life.  Many people have commented on how much I smile.  I was thinking about it today while raking leaves outside in the freezing weather.  Sure, I had some breaks in life, but so did my brother, and he has been pretty much angry about his situation.  Maybe it helps that I'm listening to Taylor Swift's "Ours" as I type this.

Nobody expects me to lift heavy things at work.  Instead, they expect me to deal with our most difficult customers as I do it as well as anyone.     Just the other week a department head overheard me on the phone and told me that I had the patience of a saint after the call concluded. 

[smithers 70]

I am also 5'4 and know lots if cis men around our height. If you feel your body is 'curvy and squishy', you could do some cardio if you are able.

Have a look around at cis men. They are not all bodybuilders. Get yourself feeling good about yourself, for yourself.

Good luck, man

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