So... That happened...

[Vanilla bean]

My mum spoke to me today about me coming out as trans, and how issues from back at school and a previous job could have brought on feelings of wanting to be someone else, and the fact that I didn't show any signs as a child...
Also that some how watching youtube vids that are funny and looking at funny pictures are somehow evidence that i might not be trans?

Here's my take on all of that.
The school and work issues aren't related, I've always been more emotional than my brothers, I had a doll a gf (if you can call someone a gf at the age of 5 years old XD) gave me, and I cherished it, and still liked it after what ever it was ended, my brothers started to destroy it and after telling them to stop and them saying I shouldn't like that sort of stuff I joined in to "fit in" with them.
At school I always tried to "fit in" by being more like a guy, unable to hide my emotional side made it hard though, so I got bullied., so of course I wouldn't show my female side, if I was even finding it hard to fit in as a guy...

But I digress, Enjoying funny YouTube vids or enjoying funny pics is just a way to forget about everything, so really it has nothing to do with anything? Or am I missing something there?
And of course there's a lot more to it but that was basically what the conversation was so eh... X3

[Alice (nym)]

No you are not missing anything... I kept it hidden for 44 years. I knew from the age of 2 and that feeling never went away. I too did things to try and fit in... some things I am not proud of but mostly just trying to do things I thought were masculine so that people would not suspect. I even grew a beard. Anyone who did suspect I dismissed as being a typical Gemini (split personalities).

I've only come out to three people who have known me for a while, and one was my doctor. My wife and an old friend from university instantly accepted the truth because it made a lot of sense based on my 'weirdness'.

So you are not alone... it is the BIG Secret and most of us have carried it with us for a considerable length of time before it becomes too much of a burden to carry.

Tell your mother that cis gendered people do not question their gender. Just being here looking for help tells you that you are very likely transgender.

[Vanilla bean]

I would tell her that, but she'd just reiterate that same rubbish, she's so set in her ways she'd rather believe I am just going through some form of mental issues rather than accept I'm trans

[KathyLauren]

Well, it sounds like you did show signs when you were young.  And besides, showing signs when you were young is not a requirement.  The majority of trans folks figure it out only much later.

[Vanilla bean]

Well, it sounds like you did show signs when you were young.  And besides, showing signs when you were young is not a requirement.  The majority of trans folks figure it out only much later.

I did, but her and dad clearly just didn't see them and they seem to think that means I'm delusional (not their exact words but it's close enough)

[Ryuichi13]

I did, but her and dad clearly just didn't see them and they seem to think that means I'm delusional (not their exact words but it's close enough)

You're not delusional, you're more than likely trans.  The minute you start questioning your gender, you're transgender.  Cis people don't question their gender. 

If it helps, try watching this video series.  Not only is it very informative, but it can help you explain things to your family.  You could even watch it with your family after you've watched it and explain to them things about yourself that fit your situation. 



Good luck. 

Ryuichi

[Vanilla bean]

You're not delusional, you're more than likely trans.  The minute you start questioning your gender, you're transgender.  Cis people don't question their gender. 

If it helps, try watching this video series.  Not only is it very informative, but it can help you explain things to your family.  You could even watch it with your family after you've watched it and explain to them things about yourself that fit your situation. 



Good luck. 

Ryuichi

Thanks! I kind of have an aversion to talking to my family about anything even slightly on the serious side, I'll send them a link to the video when I go to work, but I've never been able to talk to them about what bothers me (not sure why) so yeah
But I also have been watching the videos on his playlist and I may re-watch again in the future if I need a reminder of anything

Somehow I don't think it'll help but who knows, you never know unless you try!