I am in a financial restrictive position also... aka unemployed and very few opportunities. Plus my wife is a stay at home wife because she has poor English skills and has even more difficulty finding work than me.
I came out to my wife before we married, so it wasn't a complete surprise when I said I was struggling with the dysphoria and that this time I might need to transition. She does not want me to but that is mostly about her saving face among her friends.
I gave my wife 5 options...
1) She leaves and goes back to her native country without my daughter and starts a new life
2) She leaves and goes back to her native country with my daughter
3) She finds someone else and stays in my country with my daughter allowing me regular access
4) We stay together and I don't transition but remain depressed, short tempered, and unpredictable mood swings
5) I transition but we stay together and she supports me
Her initial reply was that she does not want to find someone else. She is unsure if we can stay together but she is willing to see what happens and give it a chance.
I explained that we've not been intimate in a long time (about 9 years) and we sleep in separate bedrooms. So the only real difference will be that she will be sharing her house with a woman instead of a man.
Since the we've mended a few of the bridges and are a lot more communicative and hugs are back on the menu
She actually likes me being myself and it is when I try to be masculine that she doesn't like. But she wants the real me in this body and that isn't workable.
She has also watched some videos on YouTube about other wives whose husbands have come out as transgender. She realises that I was honest up front before we married and the examples she has seen, that was not the case. The videos that she watched were in her own language and showed a woman who was initially shocked, a little anger and bewildered but eventually decided that she was in love with the person regardless of gender and would stick with the marriage. Sadly it did not work out because her 'husband's' sexuality changed as part of the transition and she left her for a man.
I think that is one of the worries that my wife has... that I will leave her for a man. My sexuality is quite fluid but I am mostly attracted to people who show me kindness. So if she stood by me and supported me, then it is unlikely I would leave her but you can never tell what the future will hold. I think it is unlikely though. She kind of knows that I am bisexual already but I've been corrected that I am pansexual because my sense of physical beauty changes according to the people I meet. It is mostly a person's personality that attracts me.
I am waffling on now... I don't know if that is of any use to you. Give your wife some options to think about, don't demand a definite answer but ask her to let you know if she decides firmly on an option. If you still want to be with her, explain to her how you would see your life together after transitioning and explain the likely changes to your lifestyle.
My wife tried the 'if you loved me, then you wouldn't do this' line... that works both ways, if she loved me, then she would recognise the burden I carry and support me through my choices... and that I am being open to her is proof that I love and trust her enough to discuss my deepest secrets with her. The important thing is if you both love each other then you will discuss it honestly, be open, and come to solutions together.
Good luck
love
Alice
