Finally! Sarah's very own HRT Journal

[sarahc]

After almost thirty years of dreaming of this day, today I picked up my prescriptions and took my first dose of hormones. I have read so many HRT journals on the Internet, living through others' experiences. Now I get to have these experiences as well, and I am so excited!

I wanted to give back to the Susan's community by doing my very own HRT journal. This will be very HRT-centric, and I generally will avoid wandering into the non-HRT aspects of transitioning in this post. I'll probably post every couple weeks in the first couple months and then go monthly.

As background, I am 46 years old, and here are my baseline stats:

Physical: Hgt: 71"; Wgt: 178lbs; B: 41"; UB: 37.5"; W: 34"; H: 39.5"
(Note I have lost 35 pounds in the last four months and I do have some man boobs that can already fill out a 36B or 38A cup - I'm kinda in between band sizes. I do want to lose another 10-20 lbs over the next 3 months, and I'll be interested to see how hormones affect the effectiveness of my diet & exercise routine.)

Hormones: E: 33.2pg/mL; T: 286ng/dL; Prolactin: 6.8 ng/mL

My first pill has almost dissolved. Here we go!!!!! See you in a couple of weeks.

[Wendi]

Congratulations on your journey. I'm also new on HRT so it'll be interesting to hear of your progress. I should probably start one also.

[Northern Star Girl]

@sarahc
Dear Sarah:
I am so very happy that your started your very own HRT Journal thread.   Not only will you be able to submit your HRT and transition journey details all in one place that will help you to follow and chart your course but also it will allow your readers and followers to come along on your journey with you.
   
Along the way you will be able to share your good news and successes, and also your frustrations and disappointments.
Writing out things in your Journal will help you to process your possible positive steps to help you along the way.   I might also suggest that, as I do, keep an "old school "personal pen&paper journal for you more personal stuff that you may not want to share with everyone.  My pen&paper journal is complete with colorful doodling and occasional printed pictures.
   
On a cold winter rainy night many times I can be found in front of my fireplace sitting in my comfy chair reading for long periods of time, going over my transition life moments.... very good therapy for myself in my opinion.

Please know that when you post your good news that we will all be very happy for you and rejoice with you, and when the news is not-so-good, we are here to lend our ear to listen and our shoulder to lean on.

Here on the Forums we are your biggest fans and will always be supporting you as you reach for your goals.
Please continue to keep us all updated, but only as you feel comfortable doing.

Again, thank you for starting your very own personal HRT Journal thread...  it will become your home here on the Forums.
HUGS AND MORE HUGS,
Danielle

[Northern Star Girl]

Congratulations on your journey. I'm also new on HRT so it'll be interesting to hear of your progress. I should probably start one also.

@Wendi
Dear Wendi:
Yes indeed, I would suggest that at some time of your choosing you may want to start your own personal thread and journal chronicling your progress in your own transition journey.  If you don't feel comfortable doing that for everyone here to read, please consider a personal pen&paper journal that you can privately chart your progress.

Hugs and well wishes... and I am so glad that you recently became a member of Susan's Place and have involved yourself in the Forums.

Wishing you well in your journey,
Hugs,
Danielle

[Jaime320]

Get ready for a roller coaster ride. Usually things get better after starting HRT. You'll know in short order if it's right for you. We all look forward to hearing your progress.  Be well. Jaime

[pamelatransuk]

Congratulations Sarah on starting HRT. You'll remember taking the first tablet(s) forever. I assume you are on both Estradiol and a T Blocker?

I wish you every happiness on your HRT journey.

Hugs

Pamela

[sarahc]

Congratulations Sarah on starting HRT. You'll remember taking the first tablet(s) forever. I assume you are on both Estradiol and a T Blocker?

I wish you every happiness on your HRT journey.

Hugs

Pamela

Yes - estradiol and t-blocker. Fortunately, my doctor is a trans health specialist, and given my generally good health, she was comfortable starting me on decent starting doses of both, so hopefully effects will kick in sooner than average.

After two days, no effects so far!

[sarahc]

ONE MONTH UPDATE!

It has been a fairly undramatic month.  Let's start with the stats:

Start of HRT Jan 16 2019: Hgt: 71"; Wgt: 178lbs; B: 41"; UB: 37.5"; W: 34"; H: 39.5"
Feb 14 2019: Hgt 71"; Wgt: 170 lbs (-8lbs); B: 40.5" (-0.5"); UB 37" (-0.5"); W: 33" (-1.0"); H: 38" (-1.5"); Thighs: 21"; Biceps: 11.5"

PHYSICAL EFFECTS:
* In terms of measurements, the diet continues to make progress in shrinking the bulk everywhere. Unfortunately, the hips are shrinking as well (darn!), and that's the one area of my body I wish would hang in there. I have noticed in the past couple of months that the diet (and exercise regimen) has shrunk my thighs and biceps a lot, so I'm going to start tracking that.
* Spiro definitely played a factor in the continued weight loss this month. I lost a ton of weight on the first two weeks on HRT, presumably because I got dehydrated. I went from 178 lbs to 171 lbs in ten days, and quite frankly I really didn't want to lose more weight that fast. So I focused on keeping weight flat for the rest of the month, so I ate a little bit more than usual. I'll be looking to go down to 165 lbs by March 15.
* Peeing: I had to drink and pee a bit more for a week or so during week 2, but that's gone away. Seems like I've adjusted to the spiro.
* Breasts: Some limited off-and-on breast sensitivity, especially 3-4 hours after my dose. I already had fairly prominent moobs and nipples prior to HRT and they can sometimes be a little bit more sensitive, but it's not yet constant soreness or sensitivity from the breasts. The nipples do seem a little firmer, however. Will be interesting to see what happens in month 2. Don't need a full-time bra yet, but given my moobs and already fairly prominent nipples, it may not take much for me to need one.
* Libido: Waaay down. Much harder to maintain an erection, and just less interested in masturbating. I do try to get things going down there 2-3 times a week, but that's definitely less than before HRT. Was surprised how fast that happened.
* Endurance: I play tennis in a two-hour block most weeks and last week was the first time ever that I felt a little winded at the end of the session, which has never happened before. HOWEVER, I have had the rotten cold that seems to be going around for the past three weeks, so that may be the reason. That cold has also prevented from me doing much running as well. I hope this cold goes away soon so I have a better sense of what my endurance level is. Hopefully it's just the cold.
* Temperature regulation: Unfortunately, I started getting the dreaded night sweats, and after many nights, my sheets are soaked in the morning. I've shed layers off my bed (bye-bye down comforter!), but I'm still having a hard time staying comfortable. But like with the exercise endurance, I'm not sure to what extent it has to do with my cold vs. effects of HRT. I got my cold the 2nd week of HRT, which is also when the night sweats started, so again, this is going to be something I monitor in month 2. There's also the fact that I've lost a lot of weight and that could be a factor...so it's all complicated. If I continue to get these night sweats after the cold goes away, I'll let my doctor know and we'll discuss.

EMOTIONAL EFFECTS:
* None. Literally I feel like the same person as before. Which is fine! I was emotionally healthy entering this process, so I'm not really seeking huge emotional changes (but will embrace them if they happen!).

I think that's it. The first month went pretty much I would have expected (except the night sweats were a mild surprise).

No change in prescription levels...next check-in with my doctor is in April, when I'll get my labs done again.

Sarah

[sarahc]

WEEK 5 QUICK UPDATE

Boobs definitely much more sensitive this week. If I push on my boobs from my nipple area, they're pretty sore. And I have bumped them a couple of times, and...yeah, that's not fun. It's so exciting - it's happening!

Sarah

[Northern Star Girl]

@sarahc
Dear Sarah:
I have enjoyed your HRT journal since you recently started posting it... but I just realized that I have neglected to share my thoughts with you regarding what you may expect in your HRT journey as you continue on.

At the risk of me telling you what you may have already heard... here is important stuff for you and anyone no matter where they are in their transition journey.
...here are some of my thoughts and my own experiences as it may relate to what you are going through.

As has been stated over and over here on the Forums in many of my past comments on various posts, HRT will work uniquely in your own unique body.
What you read about other transitioning members experiences with HRT most likely will not be identical to your own experiences.

Some will experience more significant changes more quickly and then some will experience less significant changes more slowly....   it is all up to your genes and how your body reacts to the HRT.   Your doctor will  undoubtedly be continuing to look at your frequent blood test results during your journey to determine if any alterations in the HRT regimen are needed.

The adage that you have probably already heard regarding HRT and how it may work for various individuals is "YMMV"  meaning that Your Mileage May Vary.
   
PATIENCE is definitely required.... usually not much happens very quickly with HRT... but changes will happen.  Do some reading of other transitioners posts and look at many of the posted HRT timelines and the before and after pictures. ....  they can give you a rough idea of what you MIGHT expect as time goes on.

As you have already reported in your WEEK 5 QUICK UPDATE, many times the very first noticeable changes can be felt and seen within the first 1 to 4 months... nipple and breast tenderness, erect nipples a lot of the time, breast bud lumps forming under the nipples and as you mentioned pain when bumping your nipples.  Also changes in body hair growth, also your own body and urine smell, changes in erections becoming less intense, less libido, etc.

Without a doubt this can be very "EXCITING and SCARY all at the same time."   One needs to hang on for an amazing ride.  Some of my best and most appreciated and dramatic body changes happened at about the  4 to 6 month point through the start of year #2 of my HRT journey. 

Regarding your body measurements, it is good that you have established a reference point  allowing you to judge your body changes.   As you noted you have already seen change in many of your body measurements... much of it due to your weight loss efforts, kudos to you for your hard work in that task.  For me, I did not gain a whole lot in my hips but my breast growth was very good and after 2 years of HRT my breasts were a C-cup.   
Many will achieve an A or a B cup and some transitioners may possibly achieve a C-cup or even a D-cup.
Even though I was able to very successfully pass before I went full-time... when I did go full-time at the 1 1/2 year mark I have been passing 100% of the time.  Of course that is just my experience, I suppose I can thank my body makeup and my genes for all that.

We are here to rejoice with you in the good times and to support you in the not so good times.
One more time.... PATIENCE is required.   The attitude of many people today is "I want it all and I want it now" ... that will not apply to HRT.  You might want to re-read what I just wrote so you can get a good grasp of the details that I mentioned.

With your own progress... things will happen with HRT, but in their own time and in their own ways in your unique body.

I will be looking forward to your continued updates as you feel free to post them.  Please hang in there!
Hugs and well wishes
Danielle

[sarahc]

WEEK 5.5 UPDATE

Played tennis today and ow! My breasts were not happy when I was running around - definitely felt soreness  when I was moving. I got through it alright, but it's probably getting close to sports bra time when I'm active.

I haven't jogged in a couple weeks because of the bronchitis I have had, but I don't think I'm going to be able to run without a bra going forward. I might go down to the treadmill in the next day or two to see how things feel.

I also feel like I have a little less endurance, but that could be the bronchitis.

[mm]

 sarahc, yes, you probably do need to be considering a sports bra when you are active now.  There are sports bras with wide shoulder straps that don't appear as a bra under your shirts, also check the color of the bra and yours shirts to see if it shows through your shirt.

[Sophiaprincess2019]

Congratulations Sarah, I also JUST got back from the Pharmacy (like an hour ago) and I will take my 1st dose in the morning: both E and Spiro. I'm 50 y.o. and my Endo gave me pills to see if I like the result. She also said I can switch to injections if I'd like. Finally the wait is over. Now we can focus on outfits and shoes!

Hugs girls!

Sophia

[Julie -2010]

Sarah,

  So happy for you.  HRT for me has been great.  Thanks for posting updates and sharing your experiences.

Julie

[HappyMoni]

You wrote:

EMOTIONAL EFFECTS:
* None. Literally I feel like the same person as before. Which is fine! I was emotionally healthy entering this process, so I'm not really seeking huge emotional changes (but will embrace them if they happen!).

Sarah,
I know you are documenting as you go. I think you will find that this aspect will sneak up on you. For the longest time, I thought that nothing was happening emotionally. It was only after quite a few months that I suddenly had an epithany and realized I was very different. My cliche for the difference I experienced is 'seeing emotions in black and white before and now seeing them in color.' I'm excited for you if you find the same thing. Just have some tissues stashed around the joint.

You around Baltimore?

Moni

[Northern Star Girl]

@sarahc
Dear Sarah:
Yes indeed....  soon enough you will not want to be jogging, running or any activity that can bounce your breast around WITHOUT a sports bra ....  pain and discomfort is so very affirming however, it means that things are happening up there on your chest.... 
.... as the old saying goes:   "No Pain, No Gain"  !!!!

Regarding stamina, I have always led an active life style, hiking, running, jogging, marathons...  I have found that after less than a year of HRT that my strength and endurance did diminish somewhat, now after 4+ years I can absolutely say that I do not have the strength and endurance that I once had... but the body changes and effects of HRT are most welcome...   I guess what I am saying is that it is well worth the trade-off.

I do go regularly to the Gym to workout and also continue to be involved in running, jogging, hiking, marathons, etc.

Thanks for keeping us all posted,
Hugs,
Danielle

WEEK 5.5 UPDATE

Played tennis today and ow! My breasts were not happy when I was running around - definitely felt soreness  when I was moving. I got through it alright, but it's probably getting close to sports bra time when I'm active.

I haven't jogged in a couple weeks because of the bronchitis I have had, but I don't think I'm going to be able to run without a bra going forward. I might go down to the treadmill in the next day or two to see how things feel.

I also feel like I have a little less endurance, but that could be the bronchitis.

[Northern Star Girl]

You wrote:

EMOTIONAL EFFECTS:
* None. Literally I feel like the same person as before. Which is fine! I was emotionally healthy entering this process, so I'm not really seeking huge emotional changes (but will embrace them if they happen!).

Sarah,
I know you are documenting as you go. I think you will find that this aspect will sneak up on you. For the longest time, I thought that nothing was happening emotionally. It was only after quite a few months that I suddenly had an epithany and realized I was very different. My cliche for the difference I experienced is 'seeing emotions in black and white before and now seeing them in color.' I'm excited for you if you find the same thing. Just have some tissues stashed around the joint.

You around Baltimore?

Moni

@HappyMoni
Dear Moni:
I absolutely agree with you about emotions....  I can hardly watch a romance movie without bawling my eyes out.  Also when out and about people watching and out shopping, I see little kids and babies and I just turn into "mush" ...  I can't hardly contain myself and I will talk to the parents and just tell them how cute their kids are...  and most small kids love to do "knuckles" or "fist bumps" with me as I ask how old they are... and they hold up their hand with the appropriate amount of fingers showing their age...  so much fun....
...  more tissues please....... NOW!!!

Thank you for posting and sharing your thoughts,
Hugs and best wishes,
Danielle

[Linde]

I did not really feel that I had any emotional effects either.  I had most of my life a rather female emotion costume, but estrogen must have made those emotions even stronger.  It became clear to me when I was crying an entire day a few weeks ago, and it felt good! So good that I thought the other day, anther cry day would not be all that bad.  There are still enough sad feelings that need to be flushed out with enough tears!

Yes, estrogen does it's spiel wit my emotions!

[Julie -2010]

Two years on HRT and my emotions have changed some but I wish it was more.  I don't get those good cry days and it takes a lot to even start tearing.  But on the good side, I've been so very happy since I did start HRT.  So I'll take that.

Julie

[sarahc]

The thing is - I have cried watching sob-story movies since forever. So maybe my brain doesn't need much more changing. 

Sarah