Picking a therapist

[CallMeV]

Hoping I can get some advice. I'm trying to find a therapist within driving distance that I can discuss things with. I have some of the usual mental health issues that one would normally want to see a therapist about. But I'm also hoping I can work thru some gender related concerns and get started on transitioning.

But I'm going to have to go thru a normal therapist as there are no gender therapists near me (that I can find)

I'm just wondering how everyone went about determining whether a therapist was 'right' for them? I recently went to a first session with someone and I didnt bring up gender issues yet ( i need to know i can feel comfortable with them first). I dont feel really good about meeting with him about this tho. He apparently does primarily CBT therapy? Which tho I know a little about and I know it can be helpful, in my experience it seems to get into the 'you just need to change your 'bad thoughts' to fix all your problems' territory. I'm really not sure how that would work with Gender issues? There werent any 'red flags' really and this could totally just be my anxiety talking but I left the session just feeling not great about the dynamic.
I just dont know how to tell? How did everyone else decide which therapist was 'right'?

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[CindyLouFromCO]

Hoping I can get some advice. I'm trying to find a therapist within driving distance that I can discuss things with. I have some of the usual mental health issues that one would normally want to see a therapist about. But I'm also hoping I can work thru some gender related concerns and get started on transitioning.

But I'm going to have to go thru a normal therapist as there are no gender therapists near me (that I can find)

I'm just wondering how everyone went about determining whether a therapist was 'right' for them? I recently went to a first session with someone and I didnt bring up gender issues yet ( i need to know i can feel comfortable with them first). I dont feel really good about meeting with him about this tho. He apparently does primarily CBT therapy? Which tho I know a little about and I know it can be helpful, in my experience it seems to get into the 'you just need to change your 'bad thoughts' to fix all your problems' territory. I'm really not sure how that would work with Gender issues? There werent any 'red flags' really and this could totally just be my anxiety talking but I left the session just feeling not great about the dynamic.
I just dont know how to tell? How did everyone else decide which therapist was 'right'?

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There are not a lot of therapists that specialize in transgender issues.  When I first started looking for a therapist I looked for one that specializes in gender, family, relationships and lgbt issues.  Normally gender therapy is just that.  Problems or discussion around gender.  Not transgender. That's not always the case though. 

Therapist are not there to "fix" you.  They are really just there to encourage you and let you know you're ok and encourage you.

Like if you was a closet lesbian and went to a therapist to talk about it and they tried to tell you your desires to be with a woman are wrong and to do this or that then that is a bad therapist.

My therapist knew hardly anything about transgender details, but was very supportive.  She learned a lot from me.  At the time I lived in a city of 60,000 people and there was three or four therapist that matched her credentials.

Maybe try looking for one that has lgbt in their credentials.

I hope you find a good therapist.

[CallMeV]

So I've decided to try Skype therapy with a gender therapist. Going to give the Transgender Insitute a try.

Has anyone had therapy with Caroline Gibbs or The Transgender Institute?
 
   I think I may keep looking for someone closer for therapy on other topics. But I really need someone I can openly discuss my transition and gender issues.

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[DawnOday]

What is your  location. I just reloaded all of our links so we have an improved directory. If you can't find one near you let me know and I will do some more research.

You may want to try Psychologytoday.com on the left side under issues, click more and Transgender. It will give you a list of therapists that do gender therapy. Look for the green tab.

[CallMeV]

 I'm in northern Mississippi, near Oxford.
I didnt find anything in psychology today, but I'll take a look again

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[CallMeV]

What is your  location. I just reloaded all of our links so we have an improved directory.



Do you mean the sticky at the top of this forum?

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[Colleen_definitely]

So I've decided to try Skype therapy with a gender therapist. Going to give the Transgender Insitute a try.

Has anyone had therapy with Caroline Gibbs or The Transgender Institute?

I did.  I think she's a pretty great therapist. 

[DawnOday]

https://www.susans.org/links/Healthcare//Gender_Therapy//

Mississippi? Ouch!  A virtual waste land.   If you don't mind making a trip to Memphis here is a list of TG friendly therapists.  https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/therapists/transgender/tn/memphis?sid=5c913938c8292

[CallMeV]

The Skype Sessions didn't work out so I made an appointment with a local therapist who has done therapy with LGBTQ people.
He was pretty open and friendly for this neck of the woods, at least as long as he thought I just wanted to talk to him about being gay. I threw him completely off when I brought up being trans and wanting therapy to help with transition. He was pretty obviously flailing, trying to figure out what to say without 'offending'. He had just been assuring me that he 'had alot of good friends who were gay or bi'. But with the trans people, the closest he could come in experience was some writer whose books he had read. And he misgendered and dead named this person the whole time because he couldn't remember 'his new name'. He also hadnt read any books by this person since they transitioned.
  I don't know. This is my third attempt to find a therapist this year and he was the most positive option so far. Seemed friendly, supportive and open but he was so completely clueless. I can't see how therapy with someone I will need to educate to this extent is could actually be helpful?
He felt the need to tell me he felt no 'revulsion or judgment' because everyone should be allowed to do what they want as long as it doesn't hurt someone else. Which was well meant, but his phrasing was interesting.
He also tried to ask me did I want 'The Surgery and you know'. I don't honestly think he even knew what he was asking as he was super vague and awkward. I was just like 'yeah' and didnt go into details.
I went ahead and made a second appointment, but next time he needs to have done some research. If not I don't think this is going to work out

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[DawnOday]

That's odd because as a therapist he should know that making those kinds of references only reinforces his lack of understanding. I truly feel for you. I'm very lucky as we probably have in the Seattle area at least a hundred Gender Therapists within the Sound area. I looked to find something in your area but got nothing but folk that thought they could cure you. But they don't understand. There is nothing to cure. We were born this way. I wish you could come up and meet my therapist, Ben. He has been a giant help for me. Where my other therapist offers no help what so ever. Ben thinks I'm a comedian. He always gives helpful feedback. My other therapist sits and holds up the wall offering no advice

[ChrissyRyan]

You might want to try www.radremedy.org to help find a provider.

This is a not-for-profit Web site.

Chrissy