nonbinary

[intrigo]

Hi, I have a question, I can't identify my gender dysphoria.
  I am male, I like to dress as a boy, not a woman, I do not want a TOS, but I would like to move the testicles into the inguinal canal, just because I do not want to deprive myself of the testosterone they produce, remove the penis and have vaginoplasty.
  I hate seeing my penis and the dangling balls, it annoys me to see this thing that inflates my underpants, it looks like malignant growth, I wish I was all flat there.


.  can anyone help me identify my condition?

[Dena]

Welcome to Susan's Place. What you're suggesting would probably fall in the non binary area however I suspect there are non binary identities that don't have names. Another consideration is that what you feel now could change over time. We often see MTFs and FTMs who didn't feel that strong about a full transition but they change their mind about it the closer they get to where they though they wanted to be. My suggestion would be to see a gender therapist where all the details of your feelings could be explored and you could better defend where you fit. Remember that you are the only person that truly knows where you fit in the gender spectrum. Even a therapist will not fully understand what you feel.

As for the surgery your suggesting, I believe it has been done however it's questionable about your plan for the testicles. Hormone production might be reduced if they are in a warmer environment and there could be an increased risk of cancer. Mother nature wanted them in a temperature controlled environment and that's why the scrotum changes length depending on the temperature.

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[F_P_M]

theoretically it's possible you could have a full vaginoplasty and take T gel to replace the hormones lost by the loss of the testicals?
Sort of like how cis women who have their ovaries removed end up taking estrogen hrt to replace what's lost.

I admit, I don't really want bottom surgury myself but that's I think more because it's inefficient and not "good enough" for me. If I can't have a fully working peen i'll keep what i've got thanks.
It's just easier.

Ultimately, it's your body and whatever makes you feel comfortable. you don't really NEED a label so much as just knowing what shape you'd prefer to be.
Talking to a professional might help there, but so too might seeking out other NB people or those who identify as more on the "agender" spectrum side. Good luck.

[intrigo]

Hi Dena.
yes I know, keeping the testes in the abdomen is dangerous.  Perhaps you could hold a little scrotum to do the labial and contain the testicles but much more adherent to the pubis.  although ugly to look at, I would still have a beautiful butterfly, even if I wouldn't be completely flat there