Re: The Stephanie Chronicles 2.0

[Jessica_Rose]

Stephanie, don't be misled by the lack of comments. Susan and I watch this thread all the time, and I'm sure there are many others. Sometimes we just can't think of the right things to say, so we don't leave a comment.

It is awesome being gendered properly by strangers. It is odd that the people who usually have the most difficult time with this are the ones we count as friends, or family. Remember where you were when you started, and look where you are now. It has been an amazing journey, one which will continue the rest of our lives. Keep moving forward young lady, the best is yet to come.

Love always -- Jessica Rose

[steph2.0]

I know my entries are so long that people are tired of reading them, so I'll try to keep this as short as I can. I haven't posted since January 27th, and some nice things have happened.

- The new airplane project I've been hired to work on was delivered, and I spent time with the buyer, an old neighbor, along with the seller, who delivered the plane. They both stayed overnight and they both treated me very well.

- Attended my last intro to yoga session, and signed up for a deal for another month. It's nice to be just another one of the ladies.

- Another trivia night. Just one of the gang.

- Got to say hello to Doctor Bellinga at FacialTeam while @sassycassie talked to him via Skype.

- Did another three hour electrolysis session. This time I tried listening to an audiobook. It made the time go a lot faster, though I had to go back and re-listen to parts I slept through.

- Went to the neighborhood Superbowl party, and was treated nicely while being loudly and repeatedly misgendered. Sigh.

- Shepherded my wife around to various doctors after she fell and broke her wrist. Interesting that I was less concerned about being clocked than I was about negative feedback about two married women. There were no issues.

- Hosted a Bunco night at my house. All the ladies had a good time. The one who had originally set it up (with all the drama surrounding it when I was originally excluded) took me aside, gave me a big hug, and told me it was the best she'd ever seen, and also that I looked beautiful that night. Interesting, though, that one of the ladies who I'd never known in the old days, misgendered me, quickly corrected herself, and moved on without making a big deal about it. Now I have to wonder whether they were all clued in and I'm not as stealth with them as I thought. It also makes me wonder who spilled the beans, and why. On the other hand, I was treated as just another one of the ladies, so I guess I'll have to be satisfied with that.



For a screensaver on the TV, I'd downloaded a bunch of pictures of women pilots, which were shown in rotation. I included pictures of me and Cassie on our trip to Kentucky, and also snuck in one of Jessica Taylor, possibly the most famous transgender commercial pilot (she flies for United). I was asked who the lady was who was flying with me, but nobody had a clue about Jessica.

- The local chapter of  the international group of women pilots organization that I was welcomed into in November, did a project of painting a compass rose at a local airport. Cassie and I were warmly welcomed to help, and it was fun just being another one of the girls.


I took the picture. Cassie is in pink.

- The wife of the neighbor who had given me such a hard time about being oversensitive to misgendering, invited me to join another women-only Florida flying group. It was so unexpected, and so appreciated!

- Ran another flying club meeting. Despite the misgendering at the Superbowl party, it feels like the neighbors are starting to get used to me.

- Went to this month's therapy session, where we talked about the state of my social and physical transition, self-esteem and relationship issues, and where my life may lead in the future. Some hard truths were laid out and discussed, but I was in a good mood going in, so it was therapy without tears.

So it goes...


Stephanie

[Donica]

Happy VD to you, too, Jess, along with my other friends here. My sweetie got a hug yesterday, and I'm saving more for her on Friday!

Stephanie

Happy Valentines to you too dear Steph. It looks like I have alot of catching up to do in your thread. You are a busy girl.

Hugs!

[steph2.0]

Stephanie, don't be misled by the lack of comments. Susan and I watch this thread all the time, and I'm sure there are many others. Sometimes we just can't think of the right things to say, so we don't leave a comment.

It is awesome being gendered properly by strangers. It is odd that the people who usually have the most difficult time with this are the ones we count as friends, or family. Remember where you were when you started, and look where you are now. It has been an amazing journey, one which will continue the rest of our lives. Keep moving forward young lady, the best is yet to come.

Love always -- Jessica Rose

Thank you Jessica. I should know better, but it sometimes seems like the crickets have taken over.

"Young lady!" Ha! You young pups need to respect your elders.

Happy Valentines Day to you and Susan!

One week to go!!! Squeee!!!


Stephanie

[Faith]

   
Here I am!! Here I am!! Here I am!! Here I am!! Here I am!! Here I am!!

[steph2.0]

 
Here I am!! Here I am!! Here I am!! Here I am!! Here I am!! Here I am!!

Huh? Whut? Oh, hi there, young lady. Would ya mind not jumping around so much? Some people are trying to sleep.

Kids nowadays. Sheesh.

Oh, and get off my lawn.

Stephanie

[Faith]

Huh? Whut? Oh, hi there, young lady. Would ya mind not jumping around so much? Some people are trying to sleep.

Kids nowadays. Sheesh.

Stephanie

sorry   I feel invisible some days like no one even knows that I'm there. 

[steph2.0]

sorry   I feel invisible some days like no one even knows that I'm there. 

[Looking around.]

Who said that?!


Stephanie

[Faith]

    SURPRISE

[davina61]

Big hug from me as well and just like to say your posts are NEVER boring

[steph2.0]

    SURPRISE

SQUEEE!

[Anne Blake]

Hi girlfriend, you are getting big virtual hugs from Deb and me as well...this time from Virginia. By the way, can you update our map. Since we last saw you we have spent time in Savannah, Emerald Isle NC, outside of Baltimore, as far north as Gettysburg PA, and now in New Kent Virginia. On Saturday we will be heading over toward Nashville and Dallas is in our sights for the 19th of the month.

And you say nobody reads your thread, Moni and I posted swimsuit shots in the snow and no one has commented about it on our honeymoon thread....wah wah wah!

Love you girl,
Tia Anne

[Stevi]

Stephanie,

Glad to see you have been busy and not just ignoring us.  I've been checking in here when I get a spare 30 seconds or so.  Disappointed until today.

Stevi

[steph2.0]

Big hug from me as well and just like to say your posts are NEVER boring

Thank you, Davina! I'll say the same for your thread. I never miss an episode!


Stephanie

[steph2.0]

Hi girlfriend, you are getting big virtual hugs from Deb and me as well...this time from Virginia. By the way, can you update our map. Since we last saw you we have spent time in Savannah, Emerald Isle NC, outside of Baltimore, as far north as Gettysburg PA, and now in New Kent Virginia. On Saturday we will be heading over toward Nashville and Dallas is in our sights for the 19th of the month.

And you say nobody reads your thread, Moni and I posted swimsuit shots in the snow and no one has commented about it on our honeymoon thread....wah wah wah!

Thank you both for the hugs. I can never get too many of those.

There were two problems with those pictures you posted: one, I was jealous that I wasn't there (I've had a hug saved up for Moni for a long time now), and two, I was shivering too hard to type anything about them. Even just thniking abrt thim mikes me shak too herd ti tupe.

Speaking of pictures, when are you going to post some of your visit with Cassie and me? You certainly have our permission to do so, as long as I look good.

I'll update the map ASAP!


Stephanie

[steph2.0]

Stephanie,

Glad to see you have been busy and not just ignoring us.  I've been checking in here when I get a spare 30 seconds or so.  Disappointed until today.

Stevi

Hi Stevi,

Not everything is roses, but that's life, and on balance things are definitely on the positive side. Busy? Ohhh yeah! And I'm certainly not ignoring y'all. I read everything you write, even if I don't comment!

Stephanie

[Donica]

I know my entries are so long that people are tired of reading them, so I'll try to keep this as short as I can. I haven't posted since January 27th, and some nice things have happened.

- The new airplane project I've been hired to work on was delivered, and I spent time with the buyer, an old neighbor, along with the seller, who delivered the plane. They both stayed overnight and they both treated me very well.

- Attended my last intro to yoga session, and signed up for a deal for another month. It's nice to be just another one of the ladies.

- Another trivia night. Just one of the gang.

- Got to say hello to Doctor Bellinga at FacialTeam while @sassycassie talked to him via Skype.

- Did another three hour electrolysis session. This time I tried listening to an audiobook. It made the time go a lot faster, though I had to go back and re-listen to parts I slept through.

- Went to the neighborhood Superbowl party, and was treated nicely while being loudly and repeatedly misgendered. Sigh.

- Shepherded my wife around to various doctors after she fell and broke her wrist. Interesting that I was less concerned about being clocked than I was about negative feedback about two married women. There were no issues.

- Hosted a Bunco night at my house. All the ladies had a good time. The one who had originally set it up (with all the drama surrounding it when I was originally excluded) took me aside, gave me a big hug, and told me it was the best she'd ever seen, and also that I looked beautiful that night. Interesting, though, that one of the ladies who I'd never known in the old days, misgendered me, quickly corrected herself, and moved on without making a big deal about it. Now I have to wonder whether they were all clued in and I'm not as stealth with them as I thought. It also makes me wonder who spilled the beans, and why. On the other hand, I was treated as just another one of the ladies, so I guess I'll have to be satisfied with that.



For a screensaver on the TV, I'd downloaded a bunch of pictures of women pilots, which were shown in rotation. I included pictures of me and Cassie on our trip to Kentucky, and also snuck in one of Jessica Taylor, possibly the most famous transgender commercial pilot (she flies for United). I was asked who the lady was who was flying with me, but nobody had a clue about Jessica.

- The local chapter of  the international group of women pilots organization that I was welcomed into in November, did a project of painting a compass rose at a local airport. Cassie and I were warmly welcomed to help, and it was fun just being another one of the girls.


I took the picture. Cassie is in pink.

- The wife of the neighbor who had given me such a hard time about being oversensitive to misgendering, invited me to join another women-only Florida flying group. It was so unexpected, and so appreciated!

- Ran another flying club meeting. Despite the misgendering at the Superbowl party, it feels like the neighbors are starting to get used to me.

- Went to this month's therapy session, where we talked about the state of my social and physical transition, self-esteem and relationship issues, and where my life may lead in the future. Some hard truths were laid out and discussed, but I was in a good mood going in, so it was therapy without tears.

So it goes...


Stephanie

That is a wonderful update Stephanie, in spite of the missgendering. You have become one of the ladies in your community.

I must say, I could never fall asleep during HNT but the conversation between my electrocutioner and myself helps the time pass.

Happy flights my dear Mrs. Stephanie (you are married, otherwise Miss?)

Big hugs.

Sent from my XT1585 using Tapatalk

[steph2.0]

That is a wonderful update Stephanie, in spite of the missgendering. You have become one of the ladies in your community.

Speaking of which, we did something cool yesterday which led to multiple squeee moments. A lady who owns an airport about 20 miles from me decided to host a lunch fly-in, and she was feeling a little overwhelmed. After a little soul-searching, I decided that being openly involved in the community and forcing myself to be seen in the big, cold world, might be just what I needed on the climb to overcoming my social anxiety. Besides, not only do I enjoy being helpful more nowadays, but I also love the little airplane culture. So @sassycassie and I volunteered to help.

The airport owner bought food from a BBQ chain (Sonny's) and our job was to greet people in the buffet line and keep the pans full. So we were right out there in front of every person who came to the fly-in, and over and over got to hear, "thank you, ladies," (squeee) and "you're doing a great job, girls," (squeee) and "did you ladies make all this great food yourselves?" (squeee) (to which we replied that we'd been up all night slaving over hot stoves for them). Simple, easy banter, with no questions, and the simple, affirming assumption that we were just being recognized as our true selves. Even my voice hung in there for the day. Squeee.



Nobody there would have known Cassie from the before-times,  but I occasionally saw someone in the line who had known me, and though I doubt they'd have made trouble, I did a little artful dodging to bypass any awkwardness. Even my neighbors, one of whom was also volunteering, along with others who just came to eat, treated me right.

Here's the thing: in 2005 that airport was for sale, and I had multiple meetings with the folks who were helping the aged owner sell it, with the thought that I might buy it myself. Those plans fell through when the current owners bought it instead, but the people I'd talked to still live there. On top of that, the current owners had held a fly-in there in 2015, and as the president of our club, I had helped them via email with advice on how to do it, and had also attended and met them. This was, of course, in the before-times. Would they remember and/or recognize me?

Apparently not (squeee). My help was much appreciated, with the owner thanking us ladies profusely and taking pictures of Cassie and me, as well as having her son take pictures of all three of us together. When the other food ladies left, we hung around to help clean up, and she was so appreciative that she told us that if her plans come to fruition of having a story about the fly-in published in the local newspaper, she'll make sure our picture is included. Squeee!


Stephanie

[steph2.0]

I must say, I could never fall asleep during HNT but the conversation between my electrocutioner and myself helps the time pass.

Happy flights my dear Mrs. Stephanie (you are married, otherwise Miss?)

Ms. works, too!

At my last HNT session on Friday it wasn't quite so restful. For some silly reason I shaved on Wednesday, when Tuesday should be the last day. She had to work extra hard to get the hairs in the area where I'd applied numbing cream, so instead she went for the longer ones in the area that wasn't numb. Okay, seriously ouchy. Out of those three hours, I might have gotten 10 minutes sleep in very short snatches. The "T" in HNT was very evident! I won't be making that mistake again.

I did, however, get to enjoy another delicious gyro at the famous Greek restaurant in Tarpon Springs (Hellas) that Tia and Debi are also familiar with, and was unfailingly correctly gendered as I ate at the bar and used the ladies room.

I had also gone to an appointment with my primary doctor on Thursday, and all the ladies at the front counter welcomed me with big smiles and waves. The check-in nurse unselfconsciously bantered with her lady patient, and my doctor complimented me on my new hairdo.

I asked Cassie if we would ever get used to being treated right, and she said, "Sure, tomorrow!"


Stephanie

[steph2.0]

I was more than a bit nervous about yesterday's situation, and as usual, it turned out there was no need to be.

Two weeks ago my wife broke her wrist, and yesterday was her surgery. The day had the potential for hassles about being trans, or being part of a lesbian marriage, or both. As it turned out, not only was there no trouble in either scenario, but the day turned out to be very affirming.

We signed in at the front desk. I was required to sign in with my name and relationship to the patient. I took a deep breath and wrote, "Spouse." (I considered "Spousal Unit," but didn't think it would be received well.) No reaction.

Next we met with the mid-level paper-pusher (who uses no paper, just lots of digital signatures). A large, stern looking lady with her hair in a severe bun and simple linen top and long shapeless denim skirt - looking very much like a Mennonite schoolmarm, exactly who I'd expect to be the judgmental type - went through digital page after digital page of insurance paperwork . I held my breath as she asked the standard questions, including the inevitable, "Relationship to patient?"

"Spouse."

"Okay, this next page has blah blah blah..."

That was it. She actually turned out to be smiley and friendly. Whew.

Next the nurse in the room we were assigned. No issue there either, though maybe I imagined it, but I think she got a little pink when she asked the "relationship" question.

Next the anesthesiologist and the doctor. No reactions from either.

And in every case from the front desk ladies to the doctor, I was addressed as "ma'am." Squeee.

Surgery went well, and I was asked to sign the discharge paperwork as the patient's "advocate." I drove to the pharmacy to pick up pain pills. As I got out of the car, I was struck with wonder how, just 18 months ago, I was terrified to pick up even my own prescriptions - and here I was now, a woman marching in to pick up a prescription for her wife. Squeee.

My mom lives near the hospital, so we dropped in for a visit. This was the location of the only sour scene the entire day. My mom's hubby (who is very supportive, but forgetful), held out his arms to give me hug, greeting me with, "Stephanie!" Wow, this is going great! Then, "How are you doin', bud?" Uuuugh. Oh well, he always means well.

From there we went to Tuesday Trivia. Again, greeted and treated as one of the gang. We were two chairs short at our high-top table, and the gentleman host saw me standing and looking around for chairs to steal, and rushed up to ask me, "Do you need a chair, honey?" He brought me one while telling a waiter, "She needs another chair," then to me, "We'll get you one more, honey." Squeee.

There was a new lady on the team who I hadn't met before, and as far as I know she has no idea. After the game (which we lost miserably) she told me it was a pleasure to meet me. Even the couple who I'd learned had misgendered me while I was out of the country got it right. Squeee.

Another stop at the pharmacy to finally get the prescription they'd messed up earlier, and "I can help you at this window, ma'am." Squeee.

Yes, I'll believe I'm passing tomorrow.


Stephanie