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Started by Cindy, October 22, 2014, 07:57:03 AM
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Quote from: damalie on April 02, 2019, 10:34:28 AMGood Day to you all, Sisters of the mind! What a wonderful place to be! Mixed bag of blessings, no? Here we all are, earnestly reaching to a virtual community for validation of true self, our inner identities peeking around corners. Some of us fully engaged, others lightly touching. How fascinating that there are infinite variety of stages, of recognition and of acceptance here on this site. So glad to have you!Thank you all for guiding me. I finally ... I think it's time ... Argh! What angst. This note is my introduction amongst the cacophany of the like minded. My covername is ...A hopeless romantic, in private I call myself Amalie (old German for Amelia) - Emily for you English In my late 50's now; underdressing full time for the previous 10 years, sneaking the same off and on with purge cycles since 17. Married to my best friend, 21 years. Three smart, well adjusted children. Happily far far seperated from a first wife whom I fired, I mean divorced, some 27 years ago. One exquisite daughter from that marriage. The first wife never knew the real me, and I was steeped in the transphobia / homophobia that prevailed through my formative years in the 60' and '70s, continuing as I built my first career in the U. S. Navy. Now? On Spiro alone for 1.5 years. Really, really, REALLY wanting HRT but not able to move very far beyond spiro since my beloved tolerates the femme underwear ...but just about melted down the only time she thought I was already on transitioning hormones. I stepped back into the dark quickly on that one. Some nine or ten years ago she took me shopping for bras, she being sensetive to my desires, depression and as a careing and tender person in her own right. She believes undergarments are far enough, that I should be satsified with that compromise. I'm so dependent on her happiness to find my own, even though it stifles me. It's not that I could ever pass, or "male fail". I know what I am... a middle aged fat man that wished he never was.How much farther should I go in this initial message? I have so much more I want to say! I need to get it out! To let it drop in pumbled peices on the deck... I did have a few sessions with a therapist and got the letter to support a transition, but northern Utah isn't really a trans friendly place, especially in the medical community. I'm truly sorry if I my deression is showing... perhaps more later? Do you want to see more of the story? As with all of you girls... there is always more back story.
Quote from: damalie on January 03, 2024, 11:35:30 AMAppreciate your work! It certainly can confuse things when blogs age out. However, there is value to life experiences spread over time.I wish I knew how to gather up all my posts and replies to posts in one place for my family archive. My kids are interested to see my story.
