Quote from: Robbyv213 on November 20, 2024, 01:29:28 PMI feel nowadays it seems like there aren't as many checkpoints along the way in transition that as long as it's informed consent and you sign the box and say yes I understand you can transition it's like not how it used to be from what I hear. Like Lori d said she had to jump through so many hoops in order to transition and it was a lengthy process for me it wasn't at all. I had one appointment with the va's mental health specialist next thing you knew it a month later I had my appointment with my endocrinologist left with hormones the same day. Granted I was paying out of pocket on my own to see my own therapist and whatnot and I've been struggling with all these thoughts and feelings since childhood so if it hasn't gone away for as long as I've been alive obviously there's something there that needs to be explored and figured out. But I honestly feel that it has been made extremely easy to transition as long as you're over the age of 18 in the United States, which is why I feel there have been so many detransitioners as well in the recent past. Not trying to offend anybody or come off mean or rude that's just my observation and me trying to connect the dots from my observation.
I'm not sure what the process is now but when I transitioned back in 2010 I had to see a therapist and explain to her my feelings and issues. I was so nervous the first day I wasn't able to step into my therapists office. Thankfully I managed the courage to stand by the door and she came out to greet me. After a few months of sessions I was able to get a recommendation to start HRT.
The endocrinologist had a waiting period of a month. That was a very long month for me. Then once I got on hormones I continued to see my therapist. We discussed how I was feeling and if I had any fears or concerns. After three months I started mixing female clothes into my daily atire. Things that didn't stand out much as feminine. I had a really nice pair of woman's kakie pants from Victoria Secret that I absolutely adored and a button down blouse that looked close to a men's button down shirt l. I left it unbuttoned and had a men's tshirt under and had to wear a sports bra for concealment.
Some people "misgendered" me in public calling me miss while I was out in male mode. The most awkward one was with my boss and coworker at lunch and my coworker was like no he's a guy just a rocker. People see what they want to see.
Shortly after that I started my full year of full time. It was required before SRS aka GRS could be approved. My therapist wanted to make sure I was adjusting ok and not having regrets. By the end of the year I had to get a second letter of recommendation from another therapist before the surgeon was willing to do the procedure.
I worked contracts on the side and burned the candle on both ends to save up $20,000 to cover the procedure and a place to recover while under nursing care for the first two weeks after a day in the hospital after the procedure. I thank god for that contract work because it came out of no where and gave me exactly as much as I needed.
The process definitely was gate keeping. I liked my therapist but I always had in the back of my mind she could deny me and then I'm screwed. I was especially nervous about asking to start the hrt. To me it was the point of no return. Once I started that was it and everything clicked into place.
I have mixed feelings about it being easier now. On the one hand not having the fear of rejection sounds nice but then again I saw first hand a friend that transitioned regretted SRS afterwords. Her therapist had waved her right through the process and she ended up missing her old equipment. It's not something to do lightly.
That being said in terms of this subject and detransitioning there is no way I would willingly consider it. My Mom told me when she was trying to talk me out of being a transwoman (explaining it's not a choice to be one that it's only the choice to suffer in silence was a losing battle) that she was afraid I would end up a man in a woman's body. She only came around after my SRS while I was recovering when she stayed there to take care of me while I recovered. It was the first time she actually used my name and my pronouns . No way would I ever go back.
