Hi!
I have been married three times (widowed once and two divorces), but all of these were pre-transition. It was after I divorced wife #3 that I decided to get into therapy to find out what was wrong with me. It is hard to blame everyone else when I was the common denominator. It was through this therapy that I learned that I had gender dysphoria.
I didn't understand it at first. But as I learned what this meant, I began to see patterns of how this affected my behaviors, which ultimately affected my relationships. (My story is linked below if you want to read it.)
The hardest part of name and pronoun change came from relatives and people who knew me for a long time pre-transition. Most of them still struggle with it, but I give them credit for trying (the ones that do try, anyway).
I think the thing to understand is that a transition of any amount is not mandatory. It boils down to how much the dysphoria disrupts one's life. Some members are content with a little cross-dressing. Some have found that dressing up at home works well. Some feel a strong urge for more physical changes, so they opt for hormones or surgery. This is all tempered by their relationship with their spouse. Some spouses are very supportive and loving, and they find ways to adapt. Others have reported that their spouses found the situation unbearable. And, of course, everything in between!
Check out the Significant Others forum and read some of the stories of how these marriages survived. I think you have a very good chance of being in that category simply because you care enough to come here and learn.
