Hi Denise Grace,
I remember your name — it's really good to see you again!
The way you told your story resonates deeply. The cycles of coming and going over the years, the purges and costly rebuilding on a fixed income, your time on HRT, and those affirming "ma'am" moments and wolf whistles all marked a different season of life. What strikes me most is your persistence. After each purge, you found your way back to yourself. You're still here, still showing up.
Health issues can move the goalposts. When we lose mobility or can't work out like before, it changes how the world reads us. That hurts, even when we're solid in who we are. I was recently diagnosed with diabetes, high blood pressure, and high cholesterol, so I get it. I'm slowly fighting all three back down.
Aging hits differently, too, when you've spent a lifetime looking 10–15 years younger than your actual age. Missing that everyday affirmation is completely natural. Many women, both cis and trans, experience a shift in visibility as they age, but visibility and worth are entirely different things. The qualities that truly draw people close — experience, judgment, humor, kindness — deepen rather than fade with time.
You carry hard-won wisdom from years on HRT and decades of living this journey. That wisdom matters, regardless of whether strangers give you a second glance.
If you're seeking connection with people who see beyond the surface, you'll find many here who do exactly that. Plenty of members navigate fixed incomes, health limitations, and the recalculations that come with both.
When you feel ready, consider sharing what brings you joy now: the clothes that feel comfortable and affirming, small daily routines that spark happiness, and stories from your head-turning days. These details help others recognize themselves in you, and that's often where genuine friendships begin.
You're not starting over; you're continuing your journey with considerable experience behind you and a community that sees the woman who earned every mile.
— Susan
