F2M'S Dating M2F's - Your Experiences?

[Omika]

Nothing against the guys, but I'd never date a FTM.  not my type of men.

I'll only agree with that if you're talking about plumbing and not personality.

~ Blair

[Julie Marie]

I'd have no problem dating a FTM if the attraction was there.  But I think in the back of my mind I'd be thinking I was with a woman.  Since I'm lez I'd be okay with that.  And I think that would ultimately be a problem with him as it would with me if a gay guy was okay dating me because he saw me as a man. 

Julie

[tinkerbell]

and how in the world did this thread get to the surface again? 

Wow....someone has been looking through the cold files.  Be careful now, you may encounter lots of surprises, secrets, things of that nature!  >

tink

[GQPAT]

Nothing against the guys, but I'd never date a FTM.  not my type of men.

I'll only agree with that if you're talking about plumbing and not personality.

~ Blair

Is it just me or do other people find the above quote to be EXTREMELY offensive to FTMs!  To me the statement "Not my type of men because they dont have the right plumbinG" pretty much implies "Not real men"  but maybe thats just me *shrug*

Either way I shuddered when I read this post

Cheers: Patty

[katia]

i'm a lesbian and i'm  not attracted to men.

Nothing against the guys, but I'd never date a FTM.  not my type of men.

I'll only agree with that if you're talking about plumbing and not personality.

~ Blair

Is it just me or do other people find the above quote to be EXTREMELY offensive to FTMs!  To me the statement "Not my type of men because they dont have the right plumbinG" pretty much implies "Not real men"  but maybe thats just me *shrug*

Either way I shuddered when I read this post

Cheers: Patty

dunno, depends on what context it was said.  there are lots of women who aren't my [type] either, meaning that i dont find them attractive, is that offensive?  probably not.  but if i say, mtf transexuals aren't my type [because] i dont see them as [women], then i agree, it is uncalled for.  btw i didnt read anything about [plumbing] or [real men] on yvonne's post.  did i miss something? 

[Omika]

Nothing against the guys, but I'd never date a FTM.  not my type of men.

I'll only agree with that if you're talking about plumbing and not personality.

~ Blair

Is it just me or do other people find the above quote to be EXTREMELY offensive to FTMs!  To me the statement "Not my type of men because they dont have the right plumbinG" pretty much implies "Not real men"  but maybe thats just me *shrug*

Either way I shuddered when I read this post

Cheers: Patty

I didn't imply that at all.

I wouldn't dare judge FtMs as people, which is why I felt it necessary to respond.  They can be any type of man, really, so of course I wouldn't discriminate.  The only issue in my particular case is that I'm rather sexual, and like being able to enjoy that aspect of my man's masculinity (the ability to penetrate, also why I could never be a lesbian.)

Of course it doesn't make them less of a man, but it does sort of hinder their ability to satisfy my needs sexually.  That's pretty much it.

I don't know what you want me to say otherwise.  I can't supress a physical need.

~ Blair

[Dennis]

Actually, Julie's comment was more offensive. We all know we're missing certain plumbing items and if someone can't deal with that, that's cool. That's their thing. But anyone thinking I'm female is way more offensive than that. So, to think of it, is a broad generalization of FtM's as a "type of men".

Pointing out the obvious isn't overly offensive imo. But there are ways of compensating for the plumbing issue

Dennis

[GQPAT]

Nothing against the guys, but I'd never date a FTM.  not my type of men.

I'll only agree with that if you're talking about plumbing and not personality.

~ Blair

Is it just me or do other people find the above quote to be EXTREMELY offensive to FTMs!  To me the statement "Not my type of men because they dont have the right plumbinG" pretty much implies "Not real men"  but maybe thats just me *shrug*

Either way I shuddered when I read this post

Cheers: Patty

The only issue in my particular case is that I'm rather sexual, and like being able to enjoy that aspect of my man's masculinity (the ability to penetrate, also why I could never be a lesbian.)

I can't supress a physical need.

Two words with one hyphen....strap-on!

Ta-da and with that all your penetration issues are solved!

Cheers: Patty

[Omika]

Honey, take the pepsi challenge and compare the real thing to a strap-on.  You tell me if there's a difference.

And thanks for clarifying that Dennis.  That's pretty much what I was trying to say initially, that I did find it offensive that someone would assume all FtMs are a "type of man" in who they are, which is completely stupid.  The only thing they all have in common is a lack of a certain appendage that I just happen to really, really like.

I hope I'm not making anyone shudder again.

~ Blair

[ssindysmith]

Pre transition I only dated women. with one exception my current BF he is a gay man. When we met I was very androgynous he wasn't sure what he was getting  We both enjoy both sexes as on many occasion we have had threesomes with both men and women, my BF prefers the dominate (top) role so his preference is other submissive males (bottoms) like me, or females that like anal sex he doesn't care for anal sex but enjoys giving it  nor does he like to penetrate a vagina. I can't physically penetrate anything, post orchi now and I am a very limp atrophied happy little girl

[Thundra]

Honey, take the pepsi challenge and compare the real thing to a strap-on.  You tell me if there's a difference.

No thank you, very much!  I'll stick with my coke.

For me, pepsi is way too sticky and looses it's fizz way too early to be satisfying.

plus coke comes in many designer packages sure to please everyone.

Touching on Dennis' point -- I don't personally view guys that have transitioned one kind of person, or another. When it comes to gender role labeling, I sinply don't care. All I care about is whether that person prefers coke over pepsi.

[Yvonne]

Nothing against the guys, but I'd never date a FTM.  not my type of men.

I'll only agree with that if you're talking about plumbing and not personality.

~ Blair

Is it just me or do other people find the above quote to be EXTREMELY offensive to FTMs!  To me the statement "Not my type of men because they dont have the right plumbinG" pretty much implies "Not real men"  but maybe thats just me *shrug*

Either way I shuddered when I read this post

Cheers: Patty

What?  I never said anything bad or disparaging about females to males.  Since you care to know, they are not my type of men because normally I like very tall guys and most of the females to males I know are short.  Is this offensive to say?  I wonder what I can say that isn't offensive.  it has nothing to do with their genitals, equipment or the things you said.

[Dennis]

Many of us are short. My friend Max is 6'3, and another friend is 6'1. Not all of us are. And, many bio guys are short. At 5'5 or 5'6, I'm definitely not the shortest male in town.

So that is painting a whole group of people with one brush. It's like saying all MtF's have adams apples, which you don't.

Dennis

[Teri Anne]

I was surprised to see that this post was still active (I started it on 3-14-06).  Then, I read the threads and saw the arguments building...nothing seems to keep a thread going better than disagreements, lol.  I guess it's like story structure...you need conflict to get people to turn the pages.

Part of me wishes that we, at Susan's, are here to HELP one another, not fight or disagree.  On the other hand, if we are not honest with ourselves and with others regarding what we REALLY FEEL, what hope is there for general society to find peace in what we are and what we do?  We have to work through our differences in hopes of finding out what we, ourselves, think.  To find OUR PEACE.

I will point out, though, that the post originally asked for "F2M's Dating M2F's - Your Experiences?" (not your PRESUMED preference)  I started out by telling you my experiences and, as some of you have pointed out, you may THINK you don't want to date some "type" of person but, then surprise!  Surprise!  You really like this person!

We are all different, even within "types."  So, I'll keep my options open.  And heck, if my present path doesn't work out, I may just start kissing toads.  There may be a princess or prince locked up in one of those toads.  And I WOULD like living near the water!

Teri Anne

[Yvonne]

I misread the topic and thought they were talking about MTFs dating FTMs and not the other way around.  if something is said incorrectly about I supposedly said, I have the right to disagree.  I was just saying that nowhere in my post I mentioned about the genitals of FTM's or that they were not real men.  I was clarifying and not arguing.

[Teri Anne]

Yvonne, my thoughts weren't directed at anyone in particular.  And, yes, I agree that you have a right to disagree.  Clarifying is always good.  Hopefully, as I mentioned, as we think and talk about it, we get clarification on how we, ourselves, truly feel.  Sometimes, as I talk or write, I'll think, "I didn't know I had such a strong feeling about it, but I do." 

Teri Anne

[Dennis]

And heck, if my present path doesn't work out, I may just start kissing toads.  There may be a princess or prince locked up in one of those toads.  And I WOULD like living near the water!

LoL, I may use that sometime, Teri Anne!

Dennis

[katia]

huh!  some people really stand between the lines of politeness and inappropriateness, don't they?  it must be the testosterone or something.  big difference on how two women approach each other!

[Realdimensionaltggirlhere]

In my experience, cisgender men and women who date trans* women or men are either sexually confused or completely tired of cisgender women or men. As you can imagine that was a big issue for me being a transgender woman, because I did not want to be a sexual experiment or seen different from other women. Can cisgender men and women really view transgender women and men as "real" women and men or only as something different?

[cynthialee]

I am a MTF married to a transitioning FTA. (female to androgyne) Not quite FTM but very similar in medical needs and social dynamics.

Honestly, I can not see being in a relationship with a cisgender person ever again. Being with a trans* spouse means never having to explain why dysphoria is destroying me any particular time. It means never having my gender questioned in the sac. A trans spouse/lover understands very intimatly why things have to be the way they have to be in the romance department.

With a cisgender lover/spouse I wouldn't have that intimate knowing that I share with my trans* spouse.