Does or has anybody wondered why they are TS?

[rana]

I know there is a Russian study on humans whereby they proved that its the levels of prenatal hormones that the unborn child is exposed to can determine their sexual orientation.  Unfortunately I have been unable to find the reference - so I can only present this as anecdotal at this stage.  One thing that always bothered me was how they conducted their experiment, seemed that ethics and respect for humanity did not figure very highly

My index and ring fingers are the same size - I hold my hand out and thats how it appears, however by making infinitesmal adjustments I can make index or ring finger appear longer.  How is this measurement carried out do they measure from top of knuckle to end of finger, or is it how fingers appearwhen hand is laid out flat??

[umop ap!sdn]

I should try to dig up links to the article(s). One of them involved photocopying palms, and I think they were measuring from the crease to the fingertip.

[DawnL]

It's possible that I've spent more time than anyone else in the world pondering that very question.  Years upon years of thought and study and conjecturing have led me to a simple conclusion and much peace of mind when I can live it: It doesn't matter why I'm TS.  I'm TS, plain and simple.  More important is to learn how to live with this knowledge.  And now, I have moved from TS to a new place as a woman with a TS history.

Dawn

[Kate]

It doesn't matter why I'm TS.  I'm TS, plain and simple.  More important is to learn how to live with this knowledge.

Very wise words. Just so darn difficult (for me at least) to accept and live by.

How did you get to this point of acceptance? When/why did the obsessive seeking of reasons stop? Did a specific event or realization bring you this peace?

My fear is that transsexuality will one day, AFTER I transition, be exposed as a purely psychological problem - some odd childhood obsession that took root and never let go.

And it'd be so incredibly difficult to look into my wife's eyes and tell her, "I have to transition... but I don't know WHY. I can't explain to you why I'm going to destroy your life. But I have to anyway."

[Melissa]

I read somewhere(maybe here) that during the 50's doctors were prescribing some hormone to pregnent mothers that some researchers are now saying may be responsible for a rise in the number of transexuals in my age group, allthough how they have managed to determine a "rise" I am unsure.

The drug is called DES and was used from about 1930 to the early 1970's in pregnant women.

I pass the finger test (2D:4D Test), but fail the leg crossing test.  It just means I don't have a wide pelvis.

Melissa

[stephanie_craxford]

I read somewhere(maybe here) that during the 50's doctors were prescribing some hormone to pregnent mothers that some researchers are now saying may be responsible for a rise in the number of transexuals in my age group, allthough how they have managed to determine a "rise" I am unsure. I figure god just made me this way for some reason and it is up to me to deal with it.

Cassie

Melissa is right but the jury is still out on whether if DES is responsible.

Here is a link to  DES Action Canada one of the many site available.  Also the CDC site has extensive coverage on DES but only mentions sexual disfunction not any gender related problems.

An interesting read.

Steph

[Cassandra]

but fail the leg crossing test

Leg crossing test? 

[DawnL]

How did you get to this point of acceptance? When/why did the obsessive seeking of reasons stop? Did a specific event or realization bring you this peace?

The obsessive seeking of reasons became a ritual almost and never made any forward progress.  It was making me insane and I realized that no satisfactory answer existed.  Maybe it was mental fatigue or my take on the serenity prayer.  I still wonder sometimes but I don't agonize much anymore. 

My fear is that transsexuality will one day, AFTER I transition, be exposed as a purely psychological problem - some odd childhood obsession that took root and never let go.

I worked that one over quite a bit.  So what of it is?  To drive most TS to transition--as it did in my case--was to also recognize the ineluctable force of it.  If you discover this in the future, does that make you less transsexual or invalidate you feelings?  I think not.  Will there be groups of real transsexuals who have a definable medical cause and some with an indefinable mental state?  Possibly.  So what.  I've crossed over the line so to find out now makes little difference to me.  I understand that in your position with so much ahead and so much to lose, you would be obsessive about causation.  You'd be a fool not to be. 

And it'd be so incredibly difficult to look into my wife's eyes and tell her, "I have to transition... but I don't know WHY. I can't explain to you why I'm going to destroy your life. But I have to anyway."

One of the most difficult days of my life.  I knew I was blowing my life up.  Two years later, she's still here and my life continues albeit in a vastly changed form that I am still getting used to.  If you are TS, the reasons why you have to transition is obvious.  Unfortunately, you may be the only person who fully understands that and you probably won't be able to explain it to anyone else.  Plan on accepting that no one else will understand it. 

Dawn

[Kimberly]

You know, I think I really don't care about biological factors mostly because I do not expect I have any. I should be a pretty standard male model come to think of it. But, and this is the important part, there is more to a man than a physical body. My body may be perfectly male, but I am not.

[Leigh]

Hopefully without offending our Canadians, GID is, if I'm not wrong, classified as a disorder and therefor covered by the Canadian healthcare system.  If this is still correct then there is a vested interest to have it still listed in the DSM.

For me, I hope that no discovery of causal is found.  Be it physical or mental some jackass will try to fix those who have it.  Not much different than those who are born IS.  If it were done with consent then fine, but to change anyone without consent is just wrong.

I hate to see anyone haveing to suffer through the years of not know where in society they fit but I also believe in self determination.

Leigh

[stephanie_craxford]

Hey there Leigh.

GID is considered as a disorder here in Canada, but coverage under the health system depends on which province you reside as Healthcare, while funded by the Federal Government, is administered by the individual provinces.  So coverage is different across the country.  Here in Ontario it was covered but when the provincial conservative party won the election back then they de-listed GRS as a funded procedure.  So now we must pay.

Steph

[Melissa]

I think the "why" is not so important as what to do about it.

Melissa

[Kimberly]

The "why" is very important because it determines the what of "what to do about it".

[Melissa]

Not really.  You realize that you are transsexual and have an overwhelming need to transition.  Why do you have it?  Could be a number of reasons.  What do you do about it?  Transition.  You do not need to answer the first question to get the answer to the second.

Melissa

[Luc]

Okay... this psychology degree comes in handy sometimes....

Neurosurgeons may have found that the hypothalamus in MtFs is smaller than in other males, but they also found this in gay males, back in the 1980s. Problem with that study, however, was that they used it to say there was a genetic difference between gay males and straight ones, despite the fact that the brains they dissected to come to this conclusion were all from gay men who died of AIDS. Thus, there was no way of knowing whether they had smaller hypothalami because they were gay, or because of AIDS. There's always 2 sides to every story.

As far as there being psychological causes for TS, it's not likely that it would be a result of primarily genetics. Believe me, being an FtM myself, I'm not about to say we're all crazy, but modern psychologists believe that personality is determined 50% by genes and biology, and 50% by environment. There is a prevailing opinion now that lesbians and FtMs had an overabundance of androgens in utero, which masculinized them without making them genetically male, and vice-versa (gay males and MtFs had too much estrogen in the womb). If this is the case, it's out of our control... but then environment comes in, and either your parents enforce gender norms on you and you become someone who identifies with your biological sex, but is lesbian or simply incredibly depressed, or your folks are more lax and free-thinking, you go through childhood as a tomboy or a "sissy" boy, and eventually realize your TS status.

Regardless of whether or not scientists eventually say that TS is caused by psychological problems from trauma early in life, you are who you are. And if it is the result of early trauma, you have no personal control over it, anyway. Years in therapy could be wasted just to tell you what you already know. I'd say, transition if you feel it's right, don't if you don't, but don't worry about the etiology of your condition. Just be you.

Rafe

[buddJT]

Lori

I would be interested to know to what the results of your tests are, if you ever take the test.  Please keep us posted.

[Kate]

Lori

I would be interested to know to what the results of your tests are, if you ever take the test.  Please keep us posted.

I've been very worried about Lori. She was a very frequent poster here, and we corresponded quite often... then she suddenly disappeared a few months ago. Not good, as she was having a very difficult time with all this. She was trying to find a way to avoid/fight it, so perhaps she succeeded and needed a clean break from any reminders. But still... I worry

[stacey]

As far as tests go, I found this one

http://www.bbc.co.uk/science/humanbody/sex/index_cookie.shtml

I scored a 0.  I guess I'm just a zero.... lol

[Nero]

...women typically have almost equal lengths, whereas men have a considerably shorter index finger.

I fail this test. My index and ring fingers on both hands are perfectly equal. This is probably part of what makes my hands so nice.

There's some goofy test about sitting cross-legged as a woman would (knee on top of knee). Now see if you can easily hook your dangling foot behind your other leg.

I can't even force my legs into a cross-legged position, forget hooking the foot behind the leg!
Though this is probably due to the size of my legs, rather than my pelvic structure.

Nero

[Luc]

weirdly enough, I scored in the female range. Huh.