This is something that came out of my times with my counsler when she had me writting notes and keeping a jornal maby it will help others that are having prolbems excepting what they are doing if not just bolw it off this is what happened when people noticed me when I went shoping one day and I didnt relise that they could see my breasts even under a thick coat in winter.
I have got to admit that I do cherrish the changes that are happening in my life now. and some how I need to say the hell with every one elase and what others think of me or what I think they are thinking even with the laughfs and such. I know that I have got rember and to enforce that people dont know or understand what is going on with me or in my past and as I see it I am correcting a wrong that has happened to me in my past. I was never able to love myself for the way I was. now I am starting to love and cherish myself for what is happening and I am doing everything I can to to correct the wrongs of my past.
what I could only wish for in the past is finaly becoming a reality and I just cant let go of it nor should I ever.
when I am depressed I have got to hang on to it even stronger durring thouse times.
it goes on and that was a yr and a half ago and I have got to admit that I did just that and I am thankfull today that I did. I have been reading different things on this board . and I have seen so many that are not shure that they are doing the right thing. only they can answer that question they need to rember the depression that they felt and ask themselfs if they want it to continue with it the rest of their lives. in my case I could only wish that this reality had hit me when I was much younger and then I would have had a chance at a life I would have been proud of. we even when we make the changes will have to faice the negitivity of this world all the time but we have got to love and cherish who we are as indivugals and the hell with the rest of the world they have their own prolbems that they need to address and some times they think that by mocking and harassing others that they are dealing with their prolbems
the other thing is this is expensive and it is something that never goes away seek the help from someone in the counseling services that deal with this not just any counsler that can leave you even more screwed up than you think you are. depression is not something to ignore and can lead to more serious prolbems
any way I have boored you all enough
have a great and blesid day
Kristin
PS please forgive me for my spelling I droped out in the 8 th grade and never finished school TTFN
