hi, Lynn here.

[lynn]

Just saying hi. Been reading quite a few posts for a while now and just thought post an introduction. I'll be brief. First, thanks Susan for the work you do. You have an informative website.

Forgive my typo's

I have called my other self Lynn for over 20 years now. I'm in my mid 50's and just love to dress, whether it is just underwear or the whole works. I've been married for 10 years to a great gal, Rosie, that know a little about my behavior [I haven't worn men's underwear in over fifteen years]. She doesn't seem to want to know more and I'm not sure how to safely expand her knowledge. How many relationships have been killed by one of us exposing too much? At least one of mine...

Not really sure where I'd be placed on a gender spectrum. Don't believe I ever alter my body. In fact I don't look at my body outward appearance as a true indication of my gender identity. But, yes I do really wish that avatar was me.

My first "attraction" was to my mother's clothing when I was about 5 or 6. I remember being punished by my mom upon her discovering my "attraction". She made me wear one of her huge bra's until my dad came home. I guess she thought I'd stop looking [and touching] or something. I don't really remeber my dad's reaction [he probably lashed out at her for doing this to me] Instead, I remember that I found it wonderful sitting on our couch in her wonderful bra [a white playtex cross your heart, maybe 42D, I must have looked a sight]

I'll part for now and wait for your comments. Hopefully we can discuss how I can share more with Rosie.

Lynn.

[Nero]

Welcome Lynn.
Love the bra story.

Nero

[HelenW]

Welcome, Lynn, to Susan's!

I'm happy you found us and decided to begin posting.  The more the merrier!  We have members from all over the world that come from all points of the gender spectrum and are of all ages too.  You'll find no lack of advice and support here.  I sure haven't.

Please check the WIKI for info on coming out.  There's quite a bit there.  The links pages also have a ton of stuff about that subject and much more.  And, of course, please read the site rules too, if you haven't already.

I'm a 50 year old pre-transition transwoman.  I came out to my wife all wrong so I won't recount it here (it's in some other posts here somewhere) but the one thing I can recommend is that you provide patience and knowledge, with heavy emphasis on the patience.  It has taken my wife a lot of time, much more than I would have liked, to get to where she is and she still might leave.  I told her almost 11 months ago.

I'll be looking forward to reading more from you, Lynn, and I'm happy to say again,

WELCOME ! ! 
helen

[Kendall]

Hi Lynn,
Welcome yes that is a neat experience from childhood. I am glad you wrote your post. Yes this site is very informative, and having you post and add to it helps out tremendously (as does each person that adds to it).

Feel free to express what is comfortable to you, within the bounds of your relationship. Relationships are delicate matters and important.

Now go get some "punishment" by wearing a bra.

[Melissa]

Hi Lynn,
Welcome to Susans.

Melissa

[tinkerbell]

Hi Lynn:
Nice to meet you and welcome to Susan's.  I enjoyed your post very much.
Best wishes,
tinkerbell

[stephanie_craxford]

Just saying hi. Been reading quite a few posts for a while now and just thought post an introduction. I'll be brief. First, thanks Susan for the work you do. You have an informative website.

Forgive my typo's

I have called my other self Lynn for over 20 years now. I'm in my mid 50's and just love to dress, whether it is just underwear or the whole works. I've been married for 10 years to a great gal, Rosie, that know a little about my behavior [I haven't worn men's underwear in over fifteen years]. She doesn't seem to want to know more and I'm not sure how to safely expand her knowledge. How many relationships have been killed by one of us exposing too much? At least one of mine...

Hello Lynn, welcome to Susan's.  So you have finally come out of the woodwork   As far as telling your wife more, I would consider if there is a need to.  Unless you plan on carrying your dressing to higher levels then I really don't think there is a need as she seems to be comfortable with the relationship as it is.  Now if you plan or want to go further then that is a different question and while you seem to have a good relationship at this point you should be prepared to see it change.

Not really sure where I'd be placed on a gender spectrum. Don't believe I ever alter my body. In fact I don't look at my body outward appearance as a true indication of my gender identity. But, yes I do really wish that avatar was me.

The need to find your place among other is normal but really not that important as the only person who matters in this is you.  Unless there is a compelling reason, don't sweat it.

My first "attraction" was to my mother's clothing when I was about 5 or 6. I remember being punished by my mom upon her discovering my "attraction". She made me wear one of her huge bra's until my dad came home. I guess she thought I'd stop looking [and touching] or something. I don't really remeber my dad's reaction [he probably lashed out at her for doing this to me] Instead, I remember that I found it wonderful sitting on our couch in her wonderful bra [a white playtex cross your heart, maybe 42D, I must have looked a sight]

Ah if she only knew what she had done

I'll part for now and wait for your comments. Hopefully we can discuss how I can share more with Rosie.

Lynn.

Again welcome to Susan's, I'm sure you will enjoy your stay.

Steph


[/quote]

[lynn]

Thanks to all for your warm welcome. It is nice to have a place where everyone is positive and supportive. again, pardon the typo's

Stephanie;

There probably is a need to tell more to the wife. It would be nice if I could openly share my dressing with her. She has seen most of Lynn's clothing so she knows I must do something with them. Really, she hasn't even met Lynn, it is more like I push the envelope, get all dressed up, she seems intimidated and I pull back.

It is more a matter of us not communicating in this area. We are both a little timid.

Of course, there are other issues. As I said, I don't know where I'd place myself on a gender spectrum. I am happily working away in my male life, without anyone being the wiser. Then again, I do like thinking as a women and assuming a female role. More because of the second "S" I don't ever see myself as going as far as SRS.

I would like to "work" on my figure a little. I'd like to say "girlish figure" some day

Kendra;

Read much of your coming out story. Great job, I'm just begining down that road I guess. I think my mom and sisters already know. I also like your avatar and the photo spread. You look very nice.

Must go eat dinner.... I'll post more later....

[Robyn]

Hi, Lynn.  Welcome.

It was just after mid-50s when things began to heat up for me.  Now 69, I'm 6 years postop and beginning to forget those transition years.

Robyn

[Jillieann Rose]

Hi Lynn,
My wife seem to be okay with the fact that I'm transgender but doesn't want to see me dressed as I really am (Jillieann). She would rather pretent that it, my trangenderism, doesn't exist. So it is a very slow process to get her to accept the real me. That is the outward expression of what is inside.
Anyway I'm so glad to meet you.

Jillieann

[stephanie_craxford]

...
Stephanie;

There probably is a need to tell more to the wife. It would be nice if I could openly share my dressing with her. She has seen most of Lynn's clothing so she knows I must do something with them. Really, she hasn't even met Lynn, it is more like I push the envelope, get all dressed up, she seems intimidated and I pull back.

It is more a matter of us not communicating in this area. We are both a little timid.

Of course, there are other issues. As I said, I don't know where I'd place myself on a gender spectrum. I am happily working away in my male life, without anyone being the wiser. Then again, I do like thinking as a women and assuming a female role. More because of the second "S" I don't ever see myself as going as far as SRS.

I would like to "work" on my figure a little. I'd like to say "girlish figure" some day

...

From your post it seems that you are not in a tremendous rush so I would resist the temptation to go full speed ahead until you have figured out what/who you are.  You probably already know but just need to confrm maybe!  I would simply take a quiet time with your wife, in a relaxed atmosphere, and just broach the subject that you are wondering what the heck this all means and see what feed back you get.  Discussing this with her and including her in this from the begining is often a good place to start as she is less apt to feel that she is being excluded or left behind.

For some baby steps are the order of the day, and by biting of little chunks of infor will make it easier for her to digest.  Oh and I defy you to explain how a woman thinks

Steph

[lynn]

Robyn,

I would hope that my transition goes as nicely as yours. You avatar doesn't even hint that you were ever anything other than a girl. I just hope that it doesn't take another 10 years to get there. Thanks for your comments

Jillieann,

Thanks so much for writing, I like that big smile. Seems most of us have SO like that. Rosie has been better of late. I have been able to sleep with her dressed the last couple of nights. She has accepted Lynn with the A cup's but I don't think she is ready for the B's or C's yet. I find we do best if I consider her feelings and work around them. Your wife accepts your TGism so that is a start. 

Lynn


Posted at: June 28, 2006, 07:14:39 AM

From your post it seems that you are not in a tremendous rush so I would resist the temptation to go full speed ahead until you have figured out what/who you are.  You probably already know but just need to confrm maybe!  I would simply take a quiet time with your wife, in a relaxed atmosphere, and just broach the subject that you are wondering what the heck this all means and see what feed back you get.  Discussing this with her and including her in this from the begining is often a good place to start as she is less apt to feel that she is being excluded or left behind.

For some baby steps are the order of the day, and by biting of little chunks of infor will make it easier for her to digest....

Thanks for your post.

You are right, I'm not in a hurry, I'm more concerned about having Rosie there with me at each step. As far as where I'm going [who I am] mentally I am a girl, physically I'm a guy. I plan to do everything short of any surgery to finally look how I feel.

Really, I've been working with her for many years, to get where we are. She didn't react well to the first sight of me in a bra and nightie [she already knew about the panties] but she has been moving in the right direction. In the past she never said anything like "don't dress in front of me", instead she just acts cold. Today, she can see me partially dressed and think nothing of it.

Right now we're past things like shaving my legs and the "A" cups. The makeup, wigs, "B" cups, pierced ears, and the hormone treatments are distant thoughts right now, but I believe she'll be able to go down that road with me.

Recently, she offered to paint my nails. Of course, it came out of the blue and I reacted defensively and nothing more was said.... Duh. I'd like to find some articles or stories that I could hand her that might open up the discussion.

Oh and I defy you to explain how a woman thinks

Steph

Oh, that's almost too easy. It is how I think! Really, I think women perceive things from a little different prespective and place importance on things differently from men.  Women are more emotional and tend to look at details. No real science, just my feelings... now, don't make me cry...

Lynn

[Kendall]

Lynn,
Cant guess how things will go. Those of us still with GFs and wifes always tread knowing each day could be the last together.  Quite often the norm seems to be to split for those that transition. I dont know statistics for CDs, Drag, or Fetish. Have to be ready to go together with your wife, or without. Yes take your time, no rush, and only listen to whats really in your heart, and what your priority is.

[molly]

Hi Lynn:

Your story resonates with me.  Like yourself I am in my mid-fifties and married.  At the beginning of this year I shared with my wife I was struggling with a gender identity conflict after I had been in therapy for a short while.  Based on my experience, my two cents is to take your time, no need to rush anything, and when you have a better sense of who you are and where you want to be, then you will be in healthier place to share your life story with your wife.

I wish you a good journey, Molly

[sheila18]

Lynn:  NIce to meet you.
  Your bra story took me back years! amazing how we have the same story, different name nad different place and age yet...
  All the women I have been have been receptive to my dressing up they have even purchased clothing for me. And in bed they seemed more aroused by the quality of intimacy brought by Sheila. However society is in our heads and because in an open society is unacceptable behavior they had a hard time dealing with it and sooner o later wanted a "real man".  later on they discovered that they were sorry but could not handle the disapproval of society.
If you have a happy marriage keep it. are you unhappy?
  I wish you the very best in life, you deserve it.
Love and Light, sheila

[Chynna]

Welcome Lynn

love your energy and enthusasium <-(theres a typo for ya)

My Wife (now Ex  ) meet me in transition and married me then tried to "convert" me back even thou when she meet me I had hair halfway down my back acrylic nails and enough make-up on to do Whitney Houstons face for a week!

Sorry Bobby

Anyway, after she "converted" her wife into the perfect husband (minus the breasts) I ad to leave her for every morning I woke up and looked into the mirror i didnt reconize the person starring back at me.

I just say all this to give you a possible scenerio....


Talk later I have to go pretend I do actual work

Chynna Doll

[sheila18]

Chynna:


I read the reply though it was funny in so many levels, yes I had One of these girlfriends that loved me so much but still slowly tried to change me "back " to a boy or a "man"
love, sheila

[Chynna]

UMMMM?........I Dunno

Chynna

[lynn]

Thanks for all the replies and words of encouragement. I only have a few minutes before I head out to do yard work,  been putting off with this rain but it has cleared up. I'll try to reply later


Posted at: June 29, 2006, 04:56:18 PMFirst day in a week that I didn't dress up after work, was a little disappointed and bitchy. Had to do yard work and then someone called to stop over. before they left it was to late to get started.   But heck it is the friday of a 5 day weekend and i'll make up for it.

I wish I knew how you girls spend so much time on here, the time it takes to keep up here is like a second job even without posting anything... 


Chynna:

Pretty name and very nice avatar, inner confidence and a big smile makes it easy to pass.

yes, i went with a GG that thought she'd change me. At first it was great having someone accept Lynn, but it ended because, i her mind, "we" were transitioning the other way and therefore i guess we just grew apart.

Sheila:

it is nice having your SO shop with you and even for you. she has resupplied my panty drawer several time. don't like her cotton selection but it is the thought. done quietly but it was a small sign of approval.

Again, everyone thanks for the warm welcome.

Lynn

[Melissa]

I wish I knew how you girls spend so much time on here, the time it takes to keep up here is like a second job even without posting anything:angel: ...

It does take several hours each day of my time.  I skip certain threads if I find them boring.  Some threads I seek first because I'm interested.  Many I just scan over.  If I have something else planned, I may not get on here. It kind of works like that.

P.S. In case you're wondering, this is one of those threads I scan.

Melissa