And you bunch didn't think I'd stumble upon this little thread of yours?!
I want to meet you all so bad and give you all a HUGE hug.
That said. Folks I'm okay. Really. We've all gone through bad stuff in our lives. All of us. I am fine today. My ticket home is booked - my mom and dad helped out with that, and I still have two weeks and a bit to recoup some of the stuff that's happened. It's only two weeks, and between family and friends I should have a couch for the last few weeks, and then I'll be home.
I mean folks, how many of the members here have been abandoned by family, by parents, and left to fend for themselves? How many trans street-kids wander around London or Capetown or Los-Angeles literally doing whatever they need to to survive?
I have a family who accept me, relatives who have at least nominally pledged the same, and friends like all of you. I've come through my years of denial without too many scars or injuries, and though my working life leaves something to be desired, I have a wealth of skills and experience that will see me through. I'm blessed. Alot of people can't say the same.
I'm okay. Really. If I do need help as far as accommodation for these last two weeks go, I will ask, I promise. By tomorrow evening, if I've not sorted anything else out, I will ask.
However, there are people out there who could do with this kinda help. Not too long ago a young lady joined Susan's for a while before drifting away again simply because she was too shy and scared to reach out to anybody. I have stayed in touch with her, and she really COULD use the help. She is disabled, abandoned by friends and family, and fighting tooth and nail to get the Fed to even give her disability. She faces permanent homelessness if things do not improve for her, my handful of days on the street are NOTHING compared to what she faces. We all know or have heard of people in similar situations. On our own, the best we can offer is sympathy and empty platitude, and all it does is leave us feeling useless and them feeling guilty.
So here's my counter-proposal: Help all of them. All of us. Let's brainstorm towards doing that. Here are my proposals:
1) at 10 USD or 5 GBP each, we can raise, like 15,000 USD, right? How many of us know other people - TS and TV, Androgyne and Neutrois, Significant Others and Supporters, who aren't members of Susan's, but who can nevertheless add $10 of their own to the kittie? Then all we need is a means by which to manage and distribute such funds to the people who really do need it.
2) Being homeless is not fun. That is for sure. And gender variant people are more at risk than most to ending up in that sorta situation. Now there are halfway houses out there that do take us in, but they are few and far between, and usually concentrated in specific areas. What if we could create a sorta 'couch-surfing' network to help each other out when things DO go pear-shaped. PicaPica offered to help me, an offer I seem more and more likely to take hir up on, but if we could all commit to that sorta thing, wherever we live, it just helps that bit. If one of our members then do end up in a bind, they can simply post the area they are in, and those of us closest to them can respond, if we have the spare room. If they are then in an area where none of us can help directly, then we can help them find cheap hostel accommodation or the like and club in together to pay for that, again as and when we are able. Even here in London, you can find mixed dorm rooms for $20 a night. Sadly they are all booked solid at the moment (the hostel owner wasn't kidding about peak season), but they are out there. Granted that's not ideal for a transitioner, but one can keep a remarkably low profile when one needs to, believe me.
So yeah, thank you all so very much, but as nasty a turn as my life has taken, I really am still okay. I do find it extraordinarily hard to ask for and accept help, I'll grant you all (I'm part Afrikaner, that's just the way we are...) but everybody reaches a point where they do not have a choice. When I get there, you will all be the first to know.
Long term, once I am back in South Africa, I have more options. I'll be able to work for myself or run a business, something my visa restricted me from doing here, and I am going back to university next year, come hell or high water. Then, having wowed everybody with my vastly insightful mind, MIT will be falling over its feet to get me into their Consciousness research program. (Yeah, there's that EGO again...)
I. Love. You. All. Thank you.
~Simone