I called a close friend from grade school, but one that I haven't been able to maintin close contact with as he lives in Oregon and I live in Northern California.
At long intervals, we meet up again. There's awkwardness for about a half hour as we catch up and then dust off the old conversations. The next thing I know, it's as if no time elapsed since the last meeting.
I called him Sunday. His eldest had finally returned home recently after spending over a year recovering from an auto accident that cleanly broke the C4 vertebra and rendered him a quadriplegic for the rest of his life. (Okay, the details. The son was the designated driver. A drunk rammed the car he was driving while it was waiting at a stoplight. The headrest didn't even clear the son's collarbone (he's tall.) Everybody else in the car suffered only minor injuries from the impact. This was NOT the drunks' first DWI accident...)
Anyway, my friend was talking about the garage/apartment they were building for his son. The electric company never showed up, so they were hole-hogging the studs, pulling romex and placing boxes. But my friend needed a break and decided to tap a keg of pilsner he had brewed this spring, and was ready for tapping. He teased me about the color, the creamy head and the hoppiness he had brewed into it.
We talked about many things. Eventually, he got around to asking when I'd be visiting him next. "Well, I have a lot of things going right now..." Damn, I knew he'd ask, I hadn't planned coming out to him yet (or, had I?) But I'm no good at lying -- not to close friends, anyway...
"Are you sitting down? Good! Have another drink of your beer, and tell me when you're done," I said. He answered "Okay, and a good drink it was, too!" "I'm transsexual..." >...two...three...four...< "Really! That's GREAT!!!"
Of course he had questions. But that's one less person to hide from, one less bit of weight to bear.
I charged him with testing the waters in the town he lives in -- determining how accepting they will be. He seems to think I'll have little if any problem there. I hope so, it's been a long time since I last visited and I'd like to spend some time with him, his wife (one of the things that led to my epiphany was realizing her and my relationship was one of girlfriends,) and their wonderful children.
I know that rejection is lurking out there, maybe from the next person I out myself to. But I'm very aware that so far I've been EXTREMELY fortunate.
Humbly submitted for the benefit of our community;
Karen
