Androgynes - Would you date a transsexual?

[Nero]

Please, I don't want the popular or socially acceptable answer. I want the truth.
To break it down -

Would you date someone who's gender is opposite their sex?

Would you date someone who decided to take hormones and/or have surgery?

Could you love someone like this?


For those who like men (or male bodies) -

Your feelings about dating an ftm?

And your feelings about dating an mtf?


For those who like women (or female bodies) -

Your feelings on dating an ftm?

Or an mtf?


For those who are bi -

Your feelings on dating an ftm?

And your feelings on dating an mtf?


I mean this with the utmost seriousness. Just the bare truth, please.

[Jaimey]

At the risk of being ripped a new one, I'll be totally honest.

It would be difficult for me to date a person who is ts.  I could handle androgyne, but probably not with someone taking hormones or having srs.  That probably makes me an awful person.  I have my reasons though, even if they aren't fair.

But when it comes down to it, I don't think I could be in a relationship where people would gawk and gossip and all that crap...that stems from some issues with the unfortunate people around me as I was growing up.  The simplest way to put it would be to say that I'm tired of everyone thinking I'm a weirdo and thinking badly of me and a relationship with a (forgive me for putting it like this) 'normal' guy would help me achieve some level of acceptance in my relatives' eyes (and I don't even like them...it's a stupid, stupid complex that I wish I could get over).

Well, to be even more horrible, I could date someone as long as no one else knew.  It's the being looked down on and talked about that I can't handle. 

I wish I could be a better person, but this is one area where I can forgive myself for being a hypocrite.

[Nero]

Jaimey -

So it's not that you couldn't love the person, it's what loving them would mean (to society and such)? Am I right?

I understand. Thanks for your honesty. I really appreciate it.

[Laurry]

Hi Nero,

Good question.  I like the ones you ask...thought provoking and they force each of us to look deep and root around for an answer.

My answer is yes, I would date a transsexual.  My orientation is toward feminine, thus an MtF or Androgyne would be just as attractive to me as a GG.  And, if it is not too bold, a FtM with a mind like yours is very attractive too, but whiskers are a definite turn-off and I'm not crazy about body hair, so you would have to shave.     Well...just being honest...

......L

[Nero]

Hi Nero,

Good question.  I like the ones you ask...thought provoking and they force each of us to look deep and root around for an answer.

My answer is yes, I would date a transsexual.  My orientation is toward feminine, thus an MtF or Androgyne would be just as attractive to me as a GG.  And, if it is not too bold, a FtM with a mind like yours is very attractive too, but whiskers are a definite turn-off and I'm not crazy about body hair, so you would have to shave.     Well...just being honest...

......L

Thanks Laurry. I really needed to hear that about now.

[Laurry]

Anything for you, darlin'

And here's a hug just because I like you and think I can get away with it. 

.......L

[Shana A]

I don't care what gender/s or lack of gender a prospective partner is. All I care is that we love each other. If a partner is also gender variant, that can be a plus. I personally find people who are outside the binary attractive. As my grandmother used to say "vatever makes you happy"... 

Z

[Jaycie]

Would you date someone who's gender is opposite their sex?

Already do.

Would you date someone who decided to take hormones and/or have surgery?

See above.

Could you love someone like this?

See #1. 

^^

[nathan]

Short Answer: Sure.

I've dated boys and girls of all types, so physicality isn't really a big deal.  Attraction for me comes from the person's attitude.  Trans or not, if you're loving, compassionate, warm, and confident in yourself, then I'm all yours.

Nate's feeling mushy this evening.

[Ell]

i have dated some Trans women, and they can be just as lovable as any natal woman.

as for men, i have only dated genetic males, but that was probably only because FTM's do not seem to make themselves accessible much. i do not know that i have ever seen any FTM's at any club.

oh, sorry, i'm not an androgyne. nevermind!

[Caroline]

Would you date someone who's gender is opposite their sex?

Already do.

<3 ^.^

I'd date mtfs, ftms or any other flavour of transsexual, at any stage of transition (providing they weren't too crazy )

Currently very happily in love with two such people 

[Nero]

Would you date someone who's gender is opposite their sex?

Already do.

<3 ^.^

I'd date mtfs, ftms or any other flavour of transsexual, at any stage of transition (providing they weren't too crazy )

Currently very happily in love with two such people 

Hi Andra.

May I ask how their physical changes (surgery and/or HRT) impact you? Does it change your attraction to them at all?

[je]

I guess I'll take the bait even through I'm probably not an androgyne after all -- maybe I'm a transsexual. I'm also a bit confused. What do you mean by truth?

Well here goes I don't understand what you mean by truth, but I will try to answer this question.

Honestly I don't require all that much. If they were transitioning from one gender to another, as long as they are decently beautiful, thats about all I require. Of course I don't want to just date a Rei Ayanami. They need some sort of personality. I tend to like quirky people for some unknown reason.

In the highly unlikely situation that I would somehow date a ftm, they better be extremely quirky -- quirky as humanly possible!

In the much more likely situation that I would date a mtf, I'm not looking to date a very masculine person. They need to have some beauty. Furthermore they need to be quirky!

Let me sum it up now. Yes I would date someone who was transitioning. All that I really require is that they are pretty, and that they are quirky -- not much else besides that.

[Seshatneferw]

Now this is a good question. I hope some day I'll be able to answer it.

So far I've come to the tentative conclusion that in terms of sexuality I'm a straight woman. That is, my ideal sexual relationship would involve me, in a female body, with someone else whose body was the opposite sex to mine. I can make some compromises, like being in a heterosexual relationship as a 'male', or being in a lesbian relationship, but I think that's about as far as I can go. Mostly it's about anatomy, though, and not identity.

Relating this to the question here, I think I would have no problems with an FtM, although I think I'd have to become a bit more feminine as his transition progressed. Likewise, I'm pretty sure a post-op MtF partner would be no problem for me; in this case, coping with her early stages of transition might require some adjustments to my own gender.

Anyway, it's all highly hypothetical and I don't intend to make an empirical study.

  Nfr

[NicholeW.]

Anyway, it's all highly hypothetical and I don't intend to make an empirical study.

  Nfr

LOL!! I'm sure hearts have drooped all over the board upon reading that, Nfr.

N~

[Jaimey]

Jaimey -

So it's not that you couldn't love the person, it's what loving them would mean (to society and such)? Am I right?

I understand. Thanks for your honesty. I really appreciate it.

That's it.  I feel bad about it though, like I'm a bad person because of it.  But we'll just blame it on the awful people that I grew up around.  In many ways, I'm still a child trying to earn approval...kind of ticks me off, really.

I could easily love anyone, but I couldn't always deal with the consequences.

[Nero]

Jaimey -

So it's not that you couldn't love the person, it's what loving them would mean (to society and such)? Am I right?

I understand. Thanks for your honesty. I really appreciate it.

That's it.  I feel bad about it though, like I'm a bad person because of it.  But we'll just blame it on the awful people that I grew up around.  In many ways, I'm still a child trying to earn approval...kind of ticks me off, really.

I could easily love anyone, but I couldn't always deal with the consequences.

Understandable sweetie. It's hard. Like an interracial couple in the 60s or something. Not many would be able to handle that. All we as human beings want is acceptance. To belong. To not be hurt. That's basically what we want.
I know it's all I ever wanted. Jaimey - don't ever say you feel like a bad person! You're human. And you want and need what every human needs. It's instinct. And you've got balls for saying the truth. I admire that.

[deviousxen]

Oh crud. I didn't realize this was just for androgynes. Haha.

[Janet_Girl]

This one caught my eye and I had to answer because my friend and I were discussing this very subject today.

As a Heterosexual MtF TS, I would have no problem in dating an natal male or a FtM TS.  I could probably fall in love with them if the chemistry was right.  If we got along and were genuinely attracted to each other, it would not matter to me if they were in transition or not.  It depends on how you treat one another that really matters.  And who the flip cares what the world thinks anyway.   Opinions are like butt holes, everyone has one and some even stink. Sorry for being crude.

Love,
Janet

[Jaimey]

Understandable sweetie. It's hard. Like an interracial couple in the 60s or something. Not many would be able to handle that. All we as human beings want is acceptance. To belong. To not be hurt. That's basically what we want.
I know it's all I ever wanted. Jaimey - don't ever say you feel like a bad person! You're human. And you want and need what every human needs. It's instinct. And you've got balls for saying the truth. I admire that.

Aw.    Makes me feel all warm and fuzzy.  You're a pretty amazing person yourself, my dear!

And you've got balls

I've got balls?  *checks*    Those are certainly new!!!

...I'm sorry.  I couldn't help myself.  >  Oh, I need help...