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transSEXual in the City

Started by Dora, August 01, 2008, 12:17:40 PM

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Dora

Hi everyone, I have decided to leave smalltown, NE and I will be moving to the BIG city. My transition has gone surprisingly well here, (going on 4 months full time) but  I am feeling the need to go where there are more opportunities available as in GID therapists, HRT doctors, gender support groups, career opportunities etc.).

The reason I am placing this post in the Discrimination forum is because frankly, I am frightened by the reality of having problems getting an apartment, interviews for a job, and just interacting with the general population. I know that discrimination against transgenders is very real - I read about it daily on the internet and here on Susan's.

That said, in spite of the evidence to the contrary, I have to believe I will be able to live a normal, productive life as who I am. I know there will be obstacles to overcome and I also know it won't be easy, but I have to go into this with an optimistic view that I will be okay - otherwise I am setting myself up for failure before I even begin.

I would really appreciate your thoughts on this. I have lived in large cities before so it's not like I am walking into this blind. Still...

Dora
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tekla

I guess that would depend on the city first and foremost.
FIGHT APATHY!, or don't...
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KarenLyn

If your avatar is a picture of the "real" you, then I would say you don't have too much to worry about.

Karen Lyn
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NicholeW.

If small town NE to the "BIG city" translates to Boston or NYC then I'd imagine all will definitely be well. If it translates to Cincinnati or Louisville then maybe not so much. I think a lot depends on where you go.

If there's time I think I'd try to get in-touch with LTBG groups in the proposed new are and get some info. Most places of any size have LTBG centers of one type or another. You can google for that and email the orgs if possible. Or snail mail if not email.

There's a lot to be said for small areas where you go unnoticed in your changes, or if noticed they don't seem to bother anyone. OTH in larger cities there may be a better chance of running across people who could cause you a problem. Check city ordinances for housing discrimination etc.

Planning is never a bad idea.

All the very best,

Nichole
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Dora

Quote from: tekla on August 01, 2008, 12:37:32 PM
I guess that would depend on the city first and foremost.

Sorry, Denver, Colorado

Dora
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Dora

>>>Planning is never a bad idea.

Hi Nichole, thanks for the thoughts. Believe me, I'm not rushing into this without covering as many bases as I can. I have been researching this move for several months now and I have made contact with the Colorado Gender Identity Center. I plan on being very active there volunteering, going to meetings etc.

I know I am coming across being somewhat naive here and that is probably true to some extent but I just find it difficult to believe it is as bad as the news stories make it out to be. I suspect many of the people here live in cities -- what is your experience in getting a new apartment for example? Have you been rejected because you are TS/TG?

Maybe I should stop reading all the news articles.

>>>If your avatar is a picture of the "real" you, then I would say you don't have too much to worry about.

tekla: Yes, that's me. My voice needs work but my guess is I pass around 50% of the time. People don't seem to care one way or the other. (So far).

>>>Denver seems to be pretty open

KarenLyn: Thank you for the link -- it's an interesting read. Colorado is one of the few states that does have TG rights laws on the books so at least it is a progressive state.

Dora
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NicholeW.

Hi, Dora,

Thank you. Yes, that's the real me. Well, at least one photo at one point of the real me. ;D

No, I don't get "read" much. So far we have only had to apply for one apartment (Philly suburb) & they inteviewed both my partner and myself three years ago. Nothing of a trans nature came up. And, quite seriously, I doubt it would have. At that time the mgr was in the habit of flying a rainbow flag at the office in support of her sister, a lesbian.

But, I'd also be a bit leery of moving back to TN anywhere but Nashville. Of course, the humidty & heat there from March to November keeps me from even thinking of that at this point. :laugh:

Anywhere we moved I think we'd both want to be sure there was no problem with the "lesbian-thang." We seems to worry more about that in our journeys than anything else. Of course, even then we have maybe less problem than some as we are both femme-dykes & in that way, provided we aren't showing public affection probably not much of a worry either.

Still, I'm glad you've done research. I think people should when they belong to a minority group. Just makes good sense. No one wants the enjoyment of their life marred by nastiness from the neighbors or landlady/lord.

Hope you enjoy Colorado. And yes, I'm sure not all is fantastic there; but the ways the news and the police have handled the Angie Zapata horror certainly sounds promising when you add that to the legal protections that the state enforces now.

Betcha all goes well for you.

O, judging from your avatar I just really doubt you'll get the "man-in-dress-prejudice" either.

Hugs,

Nichole
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