Um... Hi! :)

[emilykitten]

Hi everyone,

I'm Emily and whilst I'm British/Swedish, at the moment I live between Strasbourg in France (week-ends) and Düsseldorf in Germany (work-week). I'm 36 years old now and I transitioned in 2006 after far too many years agonising, hiding and denying and it was definitely the right thing to do. I'm still pre-op (working on saving the money for the op) and am generally just living my life as a woman though not really in stealth (I'm in the IT industry, which is a very small world!)

For a long while, I dropped out of the trans community... Normal life took over and to be honest, the 'being trans' part of my life is gradually merging into just one of the aspects of my personality. However, that said, I've run into some hard times when I could do with being able to talk with some people who are on the same path and I've had some good times which I'd like to share.

Right now, it's time for things to change for me. Being in a crumbling relationship has left me with no more ties to where I live now (Strasbourg in France), apart from the fact that I simply adore the place, and having done marketing in the PC world for so many years I've decided that I'm going to change that, too. So, I'm hassling all the head-hunters for a new job in a new place and a new industry... The big question: How much will being trans make this more difficult...

[HelenW]

... The big question: How much will being trans make this more difficult...

What the head-hunters don't know won't hurt them - or you.

When I was faced with the prospect of mounting a job search four months after going full time I agonized a bit about how much and when to disclose my past.  I decided to keep the trans part of my past unmentioned until it became an issue, in my case, when I gave the Human Resources department of my new employer my Social Security information.  It was only then that I felt I had to, in order to preempt any surprise they may receive from the SSA sending a "no match" letter.  I was fortunate that they accepted me with no qualms, I could have legally been fired, my state doesn't protect people on the basis of their gender identity and expression.

I felt this was the best strategy because I felt coming out up front would have eliminated even the chance of an interview, a chance to show what I could do and who I was.  After all, had I had a cancer or some other serious medical problem before, I certainly would not have had to disclose it at all.  My past has nothing to do with my skills and abilities to do the job.

So, if I were in your place, I'd just go about the job search and never mention it unless you are forced by outside influences to divulge.  When looking for employment, being trans really ought not to be an issue.

hugs & smiles
Emelye

[Buffy]

Hi Emily,

Welcome to Susan's, I enjoyed reading your introduction.

It must be fun working in France (and also spending time in Germany) both great Countries.

I empathise with your sentiments on talking, I have been through some tough times in my life and having someone around, who understands the thoughts and processes you are going through is a great help. Hopefully you will find that here and please come into the chat room any time you need.

I also now live and work abroad, I left the UK in 2002 and have lived & worked  in a number of countries before I settled in my current home in 2004.

In Europe, the anti-discrimination laws are strong and enforcable. The EU is particularly strong following the ruling at the Court of Human Rights in Strassbourg in 2002, where Christine Goodwin took the UK Government to Court as they would not let her Marry. Gender Recognition is now enacted in many of the EU Countries as a result of the EU ruling that the UK Government should allow her to change her birth certificate.

If you have a British Passport and been transitioned at least 2 years, you can apply for a Gender Recognition Certificate (GRC) through the Gender Recognition Pannel, which allows you to change your Birth certificate.  This is recognized throughout the EU. I changed mine in 2005, although I had to travel back to the UK a couple of times due to bureacracy.

It is always difficult to move and start a new life and career, I know I have done it. But your bio below shows that you are use to living abroad and if you stay in Europe you have the backing of the law, outside Europe you take a bigger chance!

Keep us informed on progress.

Buffy

[emilykitten]

What the head-hunters don't know won't hurt them - or you.

Hi Emelye!

Thanks for the encouragement! Yes, you're definitely right... I don't tell upfront and there's nothing to identify as me as trans in Europe (my passport is already with a nice 'F' in it). The biggest question to me is finding out about my transition on the net (a bit of Googling gives enough hints) and, of course, getting read in the interview.

Anyway, I'm sure I'll find something fun!

Hugs,

Em

Posted on: 03 August 2008, 10:35:02Hi Buffy,

Thanks for the kind welcome!

It must be fun working in France (and also spending time in Germany) both great Countries.

Yes, I do love both countries and I like living in countries which are outside of my own culture (though I've been in France so long that that's no longer really true for France anymore!!!) Whilst I'm looking for work all over, Europe does make more sense since there is more social protection and I still haven't finished my explorations of this lovely continent. Surprisingly, the idea which scares me most isn't trying some new country, it's going back to the UK after all these years!!! However, if that's where the good jobs are, I guess I can survive!

If you have a British Passport and been transitioned at least 2 years, you can apply for a Gender Recognition Certificate (GRC) through the Gender Recognition Pannel, which allows you to change your Birth certificate.

I didn't realise that this was possible without GRS! I shall definitely have to look into this since the sooner I can make everything official, the sooner I can let go of the remnants of my past!

Hugs,

Em

[Chrissty]

Surprisingly, the idea which scares me most isn't trying some new country, it's going back to the UK after all these years!!! However, if that's where the good jobs are, I guess I can survive!

Hi Emily,

..and welcome from the UK!

I hope your job hunting goes well, but I'd be surprised if you
find the best jobs back here, as there is a lot of instabilty at
the moment.

I've only been on this site for a little over a month, but I find
the diversity of views and topics facinating. I hope you can
find some inspiration for your next step.



Chrissty

 

[emilykitten]

I hope your job hunting goes well, but I'd be surprised if you
find the best jobs back here, as there is a lot of instabilty at
the moment.

I think it's pretty unstable everywhere at the moment!!!!

I've only been on this site for a little over a month, but I find
the diversity of views and topics facinating. I hope you can
find some inspiration for your next step.

I'm quite enjoying it already... There really is such a wide variety of people and content here which is quite refreshing!

Hugs,

Em

[tinkerbell]

Hello Emily and welcome to Susan's!

Thanks so much for introducing yourself.  Please take a few moments to get familiar with all the boards of the site, review the site rules before posting, and take advantage of our many resources such as the wiki, chat, and the links listed at the main page.  We look forward to your future posts and participation.  Enjoy your stay

tink

[emilykitten]

Thanks, Tink! It seems like a lovely place here... I shall enjoy visiting!

Hugs,

Em