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Anyone ever gotten this?

Started by deviousxen, August 15, 2008, 03:29:20 AM

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deviousxen

I think a friend thinks I'm asexual. Does anyone else get the Asexual suspicions from other people when you are in a sexually uncomfortable position in your life?

I mean... Mine is awakening really well I think, but some people just think I'm asexual....
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sd

I have had people question my sexuality a few times, usually I just ignore it.
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Nero

I've had a boyfriend say it before. Actually, I'm a very sexual person but in certain situations I'm not. Like when a guy tries to seduce me as if I were some kind of woman, I just get turned off and don't want it. I don't mind being seduced, just not like a woman.

When you're trans, you usually don't approach sex the way people think you're 'supposed to', so their conclusion is that you must be asexual or otherwise abnormal (to them).
Don't listen to them. You know who you are and whether you're asexual or not.
Nero was the Forum Admin here at Susan's Place for several years up to the time of his death.
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sd

Yes, tell her, plain and simple.

Some things she has said may be because she has feelings, tell her and let her work it out. Also you may not have been ready for what happened due to being seduced the wrong way, or maybe you still are not sure. Talk to her, explain your confusion about yourself, and how you feel about what happened and why. If you are unsure, how can she be. Either way it sounds like she is not happy with her current situation.




I cannot imagine anyone accusing Nero of being asexual.  :laugh:
I think that just sort of shows how little people understand about it.
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tekla

The only rational response to this question is "Only with you."
FIGHT APATHY!, or don't...
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deviousxen

Quote from: Leslie Ann on August 15, 2008, 04:36:39 PM
Yes, tell her, plain and simple.

Some things she has said may be because she has feelings, tell her and let her work it out. Also you may not have been ready for what happened due to being seduced the wrong way, or maybe you still are not sure. Talk to her, explain your confusion about yourself, and how you feel about what happened and why. If you are unsure, how can she be. Either way it sounds like she is not happy with her current situation.




I cannot imagine anyone accusing Nero of being asexual.  :laugh:
I think that just sort of shows how little people understand about it.

Yeah... And guess so... And lol at Nero being Asexual XD.


But yeah... The whole, "Me not ready thing," I don't think was a product of being seduced the wrong way as much... It was more along the lines of not wanting to take advantage of someone/having a brain that hadn't been vastly reprogrammed like it is now. I mean... It was false for then cause I didn't have a male sex drive cause of spiro, and a non-developed girl brain, but If the same thing happened now, I would have probably gone along with it.

She gets how confused I am I think... I mean... I kinda have much better knowledge of what I am and what I prefer. And she doesn't seem all that happy, actually. Maybe happier than she was before when she was alone, but augh. Guess I will tell her.
Quote from: tekla on August 15, 2008, 04:39:52 PM
The only rational response to this question is "Only with you."

And wha?
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Aiden

Mmm  never been openly called asexual by others though wondered if I was myself.  I know some thought I was butch lol  One even openly said he thought I might of been before I came out to him.
Every day we pass people, do we see them or the mask they wear?
If you live under a mask long enough, does it eventually break or wear down?  Does it become part you?  Maybe alone, they are truly themselves?  Or maybe they have forgotten or buried themselves so long, they forget they are not a mask?
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April221

Asexual? No, never. Everyone used to think that I was gay. Now, they realize that I'm a heterosexual woman.
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Rachel

I have people question my sexuality because im not a cheuvanistic pig.  They ask me all the time whether I am gay.  I usually just ignore them, I dont need to tell them "Yes I am gay, but not in the way you think."  they dont need to know im a transsexual lesbian, so I don't find the need to inform them.
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Aiden

I was called a butch, but not real sure what that means, thought means a masculine lesbian lol  which case I'm not lesbian lol
Every day we pass people, do we see them or the mask they wear?
If you live under a mask long enough, does it eventually break or wear down?  Does it become part you?  Maybe alone, they are truly themselves?  Or maybe they have forgotten or buried themselves so long, they forget they are not a mask?
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Veetje



I talk alot with women....a lot more than with men...and all those women will ask "Do you have a boyfriend? " or "Is your new love a guy or girl"

Obviously I am very "gay" to them

I cant blame them , but it bothers me a little aswell...since Im not gay :(












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Elwood

Everybody thinks I'm asexual. Even other trans people I talk to. I say I don't want sex in my vagina and they look at me like I'm from Mars or something.

Then again, I've only talked to young FtMs who are with girls and do things the "lesbian" way... *shudders* Only one guy seems to get me. He said he'd never be penetrated. And he also understands why I don't want my boobs touched.
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Lachlann

I'm not asexual, I just have difficulty with my body and right now its hard to see having sex with my body the way it is or even after. I've got a lot of dysphoria when it comes to that.

I've had people question my sexuality, but its usually people who don't really know anything about me.
Don't be scared to fly alone, find a path that is your own
Love will open every door it's in your hands, the world is yours
Don't hold back and always know, all the answers will unfold
What are you waiting for, spread your wings and soar
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Nero

Quote from: Elwood on August 18, 2008, 02:42:28 PM
Everybody thinks I'm asexual. Even other trans people I talk to. I say I don't want sex in my vagina and they look at me like I'm from Mars or something.

Then again, I've only talked to young FtMs who are with girls and do things the "lesbian" way... *shudders* Only one guy seems to get me. He said he'd never be penetrated. And he also understands why I don't want my boobs touched.

Oh I feel you on the boob thing. I feel totally stripped of my identity when that happens. The only time I ever let people do it is when I'm role playing. Total fantasy.
Nero was the Forum Admin here at Susan's Place for several years up to the time of his death.
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Elwood

Quote from: Nero on August 18, 2008, 03:15:36 PM
Quote from: Elwood on August 18, 2008, 02:42:28 PMEverybody thinks I'm asexual. Even other trans people I talk to. I say I don't want sex in my vagina and they look at me like I'm from Mars or something.

Then again, I've only talked to young FtMs who are with girls and do things the "lesbian" way... *shudders* Only one guy seems to get me. He said he'd never be penetrated. And he also understands why I don't want my boobs touched.

Oh I feel you on the boob thing. I feel totally stripped of my identity when that happens. The only time I ever let people do it is when I'm role playing. Total fantasy.
Lesbians and bi girls really like me and I'm afraid they like me because I'm a "he-she." I'm a dude with boobs and a vagina.
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Veetje

Quote from: Elwood on August 18, 2008, 03:50:07 PM
Quote from: Nero on August 18, 2008, 03:15:36 PM
Quote from: Elwood on August 18, 2008, 02:42:28 PMEverybody thinks I'm asexual. Even other trans people I talk to. I say I don't want sex in my vagina and they look at me like I'm from Mars or something.

Then again, I've only talked to young FtMs who are with girls and do things the "lesbian" way... *shudders* Only one guy seems to get me. He said he'd never be penetrated. And he also understands why I don't want my boobs touched.

Oh I feel you on the boob thing. I feel totally stripped of my identity when that happens. The only time I ever let people do it is when I'm role playing. Total fantasy.
Lesbians and bi girls really like me and I'm afraid they like me because I'm a "he-she." I'm a dude with boobs and a vagina.

How do you feel about that then? I dont know your romantic preference

Hmm...I have somewhat of the same.....she-he, more of a lady with a penis...well not exactly but the idea is there ^^ And its the gay and bi boys that find me interesting

Although there are also some lesbians who fancy it it seems...see another thread by me  ::)
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Elwood

Quote from: Veetje on August 18, 2008, 03:57:06 PM
Quote from: Elwood on August 18, 2008, 03:50:07 PMLesbians and bi girls really like me and I'm afraid they like me because I'm a "he-she." I'm a dude with boobs and a vagina.
How do you feel about that then? I dont know your romantic preference

Hmm...I have somewhat of the same.....she-he, more of a lady with a penis...well not exactly but the idea is there ^^ And its the gay and bi boys that find me interesting

Although there are also some lesbians who fancy it it seems...see another thread by me  ::)
I hate that lesbians like me. They shouldn't, because I'm not a girl... and I don't want a girl to be attracted to my mixed parts. I want her to be attracted to my masculinity. Just like I'm attracted to a transgirl's femininity. I'd have nothing to do with her penis, because her penis has got nothing to do with why she is so beautiful to me.

My preference is that I can be with someone who respects my sexual boundaries...
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Veetje

Quote from: Elwood on August 18, 2008, 03:59:44 PM
Quote from: Veetje on August 18, 2008, 03:57:06 PM
Quote from: Elwood on August 18, 2008, 03:50:07 PMLesbians and bi girls really like me and I'm afraid they like me because I'm a "he-she." I'm a dude with boobs and a vagina.
How do you feel about that then? I dont know your romantic preference

Hmm...I have somewhat of the same.....she-he, more of a lady with a penis...well not exactly but the idea is there ^^ And its the gay and bi boys that find me interesting

Although there are also some lesbians who fancy it it seems...see another thread by me  ::)
I hate that lesbians like me. They shouldn't, because I'm not a girl... and I don't want a girl to be attracted to my mixed parts. I want her to be attracted to my masculinity. Just like I'm attracted to a transgirl's femininity. I'd have nothing to do with her penis, because her penis has got nothing to do with why she is so beautiful to me.

My preference is that I can be with someone who respects my sexual boundaries...

I would really positively be surprised if there was a gay guy who had the balls ( hehe) to say "Yes, I would Like a FtM as a boyfriend, because of his masculinity"

Some gay men just want a lady with a penis :S

WEll perhaps a certain person will come your way....

THe more I think about it the more I think I like girls who have a display of both genders in them...that reallly turns me on....and the same for boys I think. I dont think I could be with someone who is just pure masculine or feminine, in his or her feelings
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Elwood

Quote from: Veetje on August 18, 2008, 04:06:43 PM
Quote from: Elwood on August 18, 2008, 03:59:44 PM
Quote from: Veetje on August 18, 2008, 03:57:06 PM
Quote from: Elwood on August 18, 2008, 03:50:07 PMLesbians and bi girls really like me and I'm afraid they like me because I'm a "he-she." I'm a dude with boobs and a vagina.
How do you feel about that then? I dont know your romantic preference

Hmm...I have somewhat of the same.....she-he, more of a lady with a penis...well not exactly but the idea is there ^^ And its the gay and bi boys that find me interesting

Although there are also some lesbians who fancy it it seems...see another thread by me  ::)
I hate that lesbians like me. They shouldn't, because I'm not a girl... and I don't want a girl to be attracted to my mixed parts. I want her to be attracted to my masculinity. Just like I'm attracted to a transgirl's femininity. I'd have nothing to do with her penis, because her penis has got nothing to do with why she is so beautiful to me.

My preference is that I can be with someone who respects my sexual boundaries...

I would really positively be surprised if there was a gay guy who had the balls ( hehe) to say "Yes, I would Like a FtM as a boyfriend, because of his masculinity"

Some gay men just want a lady with a penis :S

WEll perhaps a certain person will come your way....

THe more I think about it the more I think I like girls who have a display of both genders in them...that reallly turns me on....and the same for boys I think. I dont think I could be with someone who is just pure masculine or feminine, in his or her feelings
Yeah. Most of them seem to just care about penises. Their whole lives seem to be about this guy's penis, and how big it is, and how much it cums... Jesus Christ. It makes me hate gay male culture. But I know that not all gay men think that way.

I am not both genders, though. That's the thing. I have aspects of female anatomy... and I hope to change that. In my personality, I'm quite in the middle, but I do not want anyone for a second to think that even a single fiber of my being is a girl. Because that simply is not true.

I wonder how gay men feel about phallo...
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Aiden

I've been hit on by guys in the past, but never really understood why lol.  Father had always told me that if I dress the way I do (masculine/androgen) that would never have a boyfriend.  But being as most of life didn't want one anyways I didn't care lol.

Now he says the ones who hit on me are just interested in my breasts.  I don't know about that or not,  did have one boyfriend (one of few) in past who as soon as he found out I was having reduction surgery it was like he never even knew me to begin with.  *shrugs*

Every day we pass people, do we see them or the mask they wear?
If you live under a mask long enough, does it eventually break or wear down?  Does it become part you?  Maybe alone, they are truly themselves?  Or maybe they have forgotten or buried themselves so long, they forget they are not a mask?
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