Thanks for that vid, Pica, and for starting this topic.
I put "often." I almost put "never been convinced," but I do have the odd flash of certainty in all the questioning, interrogting, and doubt.
I'm afraid of a lot of things. Partly like Pica I fear that I'm simply a faliure in my assigned gender: I don't exactly present as androg, but I've never been able to conform effectively to the socially accepted female role as defined by the mainstream. Outside of that mainstream, I've been informed ad nauseum that I have a "male" way of thinking and discoursing, and that I have access to male privige therefore. As near as I can work out, having a "male" way of thinking revers to the fact that I value positions backed up from evidence and experience over Very Strong Feelings backed up by Germane Greer quotes. But then the same kinds of people who have been telling me, for years, that I'm not a proper woman and am too male etc. will also tell me that I'm not an androgyne, that such a creature does not exist. So I'm not good enough to be a Woman, but I'm not allowed to be 3rd either...
However I'm much less afraid of that mess than I am of somehow acting as an inimical force against the rights of transfolk. My nightmare is existing as something that the cis world can grab onto as ammo against trans experience. I fear androgynes being held up by more conservative types as freakish warnings against messing with gender roles; or else that our nonbinary gender experience will be seized on and used to dismiss the more polarised gender experience of transmen and transwomen. The idea that just by existing I might inadvertantly undermine the rights of transpeople. That's what really scares me and makes me want to evaporate.
