glenda just expressed something i feel is key here... Gender has a lot more to it, than gender roles...
Rlt is there to try and teach people that, more than anything. There are some parts of being a woman that are as non optional as some parts of being male... its why the two sexes are different. After all, if they were the same, we wouldnt transition or feel so much pain of difference?
Gender steriotypes is a phrase bandied around here, and too often imo, mostly by transwomen complaining about things, things they feel are 'degrading' or 'too steriotypical' erm, did you ever consider things are a steriotype in some caes, because they just are fact? that they DO happen most of the time?
Ill tell you one thing, for most transwomen, you cannot afford to rock the boat by breaking the norm, yes... normal does exist... and im afraid normal is a forgotten concept here, its the huge part of passing, and what rlt tries to teach ive begun to find. It tries to settle the person into thier... for want of a better word, and forgive the use, desired sex... lets face it, you werent raised it, you dont know how to be it... theres a lot more to being female or male than being it in your head, if you dont know how to be it outside, you're screwed, and rlt is there as a prooving ground for you in the world... to try and let you learn to interact normally with people... to become a normal, cohesive happy person. Some parts of normality apear steriotypical to some here. I'm affraid that its just tough, they cry about not fitting in, and then talk about shunning gender steriotypes, and dont quite know themselves what a steriotype is...
its like the fisherman who belives 90% of the fish is skin and bones, and removes that, his meal is not fulfilling, and he is left wanting.