Kristen;
I have had many different moments that were spectacular, and life changing, that I felt couldn't be topped. i.e.
When my life actually flashed before my eyes, and I saw everything I had ever done, and every face I had ever dealt with. It was just like those flashing images you see sometimes in a program. Very very fast, and over in just moments. It took my breath away, literally.
It was my epiphany. The moment I knew and totally recognized who I was. I was 17. I told my mother. She called our minister.
When I had a serious high speed auto accident, and just as the car flipped and rolled over and over, then crashing into a ditch (no seat belt ) I felt hands on me, and trying to hold me in place. I heard a voice say, "I will protect you." The police later told me,I should have been killed as I lay in my hospital room. The car was totally demolished. That was a moment of clarity.
In my 20's, I had to have emergency surgery, due to internal hemorrhaging, broken bones, and a major concussion. ( I was savagely attacked by thugs ) In the emergency operating room, I actually died on the table for several moments. I saw myself leave my body, and hover at the ceiling. I watched as they tried heart message, and then EST. I saw myself cut wide open at the belly, and so much blood soaking everything. I saw my silver thread shinning. I then left. I was in a fog. I heard faint echos, and saw nothing, and then as if a light came on, I was instantly back. I was in a hospital room, with the shades offering diffused light. I could hardy speak. It was actually slurring attempts at speech. I had a wired jaw. I didn't know who I was, or where I was. I couldn't move because of the traction apparatus,and casts I was in. I had double vision in my left eye.
My parents and siblings were there crying. They said they thought they had lost me. The doctors told me, I was very lucky. I was in a coma for three weeks. Later, I knew who it was who brought me back! Need I say it! Another life altering event.
SRS was no picnic in the park. I felt like I had been through a meat grinder. I was numbed, and couldn't feel my lower half. As the pain killers wore down I was in agony. The intravenous drip of pain softeners and sedatives were my friends. The healing and the slow recovery, the therapy, the inserted block/form, learning to pee, and having bowel movements. All the Antibiotic's. Soreness and tenderness ensued for weeks on end. I wanted this so badly, and I yet, I wondered if I had just ruined my life? There was also a deep sense of happiness, and relief. A joy that was not like anything I had experienced before. I wept with tears of joy silently. It still gives me a recall of total elation when I knew I was what I always wanted to be. A huge moment in time.
Then, there is when I met, and starting dating my husband. I knew he was the one. I was like a teenager in love for the first time.
Some many others failed to make the grade. Then here was this man, a soul mate, and a wonderful friend. A gentleman and a decent human being. I was scared to death of losing him, and excited that he made it very obvious that, I was the one for him. After nearly a year of exclusive dating, he asked the question I was dying inside to hear. I nearly fainted and swooned as he put the engagement ring on my finger, after I said yes! And then I kissed him , in tears.
I didn't think I could ever be so happy as that moment. Then there was our marriage ceremony. It was not held in a church or chapel. It was at a local lake side park, with our friends and family attending. We wrote our own vows. I wore a cream colored A- Line gown, and he wore a deep blue and off white tux. His eyes sparkled as he stood there looking at me. I was nearly over come with emotions and happiness. Then we were united as husband and wife. That was the one single moment, that I know, was my true moment of sublime ecstasy. I was walking on clouds. I still am even today...
How many life altering moments can one person have in a lifetime? Apparently many. To many to mention them all. The longer you live, the more you will have.
Each of us will have our own unique experiences. Some can and will define who you are and what you become.
If you really live in the NOW, with your senses fully operating, you'll be amazed at what life delivers. Both the bitter, and the sweet.
You shouldn't want it any other way.
I apologize for the length of this post. Forgive me.
CG/Rene'
