Uh, with or without my shirt? It makes a big difference.
With the shirt, I'm often thinking, "Well, they don't show TOO much if I layer. And after I've been on T for a little while, my face will look better. I'm not that female in the mirror...I wish other people could see that."
Without the shirt...I used to avoid looking. I was freaked out about my top half. The last couple of weeks, though, I've been standing in front of the mirror and thinking, "Well, there they are, the hideous freakbags. I hate them. But my partner likes them. Can I get used to them to keep my partner happier? Or maybe just get a reduction and not lop them off entirely? Maybe if I look at the things for long enough, I'll start to like them."
I'm currently trying to explore genderqueer, but I really don't think that will turn into a reasonable option for me. I've always been Boy, even when I was desperately trying to fit in as a girl. Maybe I was just born in the wrong generation and have been too thoroughly tainted by the gender binary.