Possible hormonal imbalance?

[Katelyn]

I've been curious ever since I heard about this before on a TG messageboard, a wild theory that maybe that the reason that many TS people transition later in life is because their testosterone levels went down as they aged, thus increasing their gender dysphoria since their higher testosterone levels earlier in life clouded the sense of their real gender identity. 

I also remember reading from an eunich forum that male eunichs felt more sensitive and feminine after they had their genitalia removed (to the point that they said that they could relate to women better.)

The reason I bring this up is because its made me confused about my own self, since sometimes (before as much as a few months, but now down to a week or even an hour) I can feel really masculine, feel powerful, identify with other males, and sometimes to the point that I can't help it.  Then however, by as much as an outburst of really masculine behavior, or with interacting with women or whatever, I can "deflate" and turn the other way around, become naturally feminine and easily identify as female (to the point that I can naturally act like a common girly girl.) 

The two sides of me have their distinct feelings as well.  The male side feels more like I'm possessed, with myself feeling tense, more insensitive, aggressive, power hungry, superior, and arrogant.  The female side feels more of like I'm "released", relaxed, down to earth, sensitive, and free (and happier.)

I'm wondering if the reason why I have wild fluctuations is because of an ongoing hormonal imbalance in me, or at least that the reason I can feel very male at times is because of my testosterone levels, but once they drop, I start getting gender dysphoria, become more sensitive, and identify more with females (and makes it hard for me to interact with guys presenting as male).

I've thought for a long time that maybe its an ongoing hormonal imbalance that makes me confused about myself and my gender identity, but I don't really know how I can get an affordable hormone test (and the fact that testosterone levels even in cisgender males isn't always the same, poses a problem.)

I know that I probably sound more like a genderqueer person, but I wonder if this theory is a real possibility.

[lizbeth]

it's a valid theory IMO, emotions are often affected by our hormone levels and that also why natal women have that time of the month when hormones are raging.

I think men have something similar. not as extreme obviously, but there is some sort of cycle that men follow too. again, this is driven by hormones.

your right though, without a base line to compare too, they can't really tell if you have an imbalance that fluctuates, however if there is a severe difficency or excess then they should be able to isolate that and treat it accordingly (one way or the other ). you'll want to talk to your primary care physician to see if you can get a referral to an endo to check it out. I say get a referral only if you have insurance to deal with since it will make it easier on the claim.

[Nicky]

I think it is unlikely to be hormonal imbalance. You would probably end up with a bunch of other symptoms like fatigue, irritability, hot flashes, depression, puffyness and bloating, insomnia, low blood sugar...its a long list.

Do you have any physical symptoms?

What you are feeling sounds rather normal for a transgendered person. This often settle down as you figure out your gender issues.

Your theory about testosterone levels in males in later life has some merit I think, I've heard it said before. Not sure if 'mask' is the right word, perhaps more it is a barrier to how you should be feeling as your inner self, like a trap. In some ways the person would probably feel better as they got older, able to express their inner self more which opens up new possibilities...

[Katelyn]

I found this interesting book review on a male with prolactinoma, about the role of hormones in dictating how someone thinks....

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1585420832/ref=cm_rdp_product

      
5 of 5 people found the following review helpful:
4.0 out of 5 stars What's it like to be a man without testicles, April 14, 2004
By    world class wreckin cru "dallasite" (Dallas, TX) - See all my reviews

A prolactinoma is a pituitary gland tumor that produces excessive amounts of the hormone prolactin. This slow-growing tumor accurs in both men and women and is often not identified as the source of health problems until it has grown to a rather large size. In a male, excessive prolactin has an emasculating and feminizing effect. Testosterone levels decrease, the sex drive all but disappears, and erections are practically impossible to achieve. To make matters worse, when prolactin reaches high enough levels in the blood, it can cause males to lactate.

At least 10 years of Ken Baker's life was spent in the confusing world created by his prolactinoma. He was unable to understand why the rest of the guys around him were so sex-obsessed. He could not figure out why 500 sit-ups a day didn't flatten his stomach even though his fellow hockey players were able to build up their bodies with less dedication. He didn't understand why a young athletic male such as himself could rarely ever achieve an erection. He didn't know why his headaches were getting worse, and he certainly had no clue why he was lactating. But to designate Ken Baker's years living with a prolactinoma in his head as an emasculated hell would not do justice to his profound experience. He has had the rare opportunity of observing the members of his own gender with the mindset of someone somewhere between male and female. He saw us for what we are. The obsession with sex, the never-cry-in-public manliness, the male chauvinism, and other characteristics we as males possess, Ken Baker could not relate to. When finally diagnosed and treated (most importantly, when sex drive and erections returned), he was finally able to understand why so many men possessed the characteristics that he had disdained for so long.

This book several other storylines besides the chief one of the author's struggle to understand his "emasculation." He describes his relationship with his father who he loved very much despite the fact that he was often unsupportive, tempestuous, and even racist. The descriptions of his relationships with his brothers invoke both laughter and sadness.

I recommend this book to anyone who accepts the fallacy that male attitudes, sex drive, and the such are solely under the control of the mind and that males just choose to be what they are. Ken Baker is proof that a little hormone called testosterone has quite a bit more to do with it than you think.

[Alyssa M.]

I'm not sure about the original post. But there was the case of a man who fully and successfully transitioned for a couple of decades before detransitioning. Joseph something. It turned out he was intersexed -- I think it was something like mosaic 42xx/xy -- which he seemed to think was relevant. I'm not sure how.

As to the general effect of testosterone, there was a really cool episode of This American Life on the subject. You can listen to it for free by going to this website:

http://www.thislife.org/Radio_Episode.aspx?episode=220

~Alyssa

[Elizabeth K]

I was always gender dysphoric, and my hormones were male enough when I was a young person and as an adult.  I lost a lot of my testosterone production after age 50 , but I didn't seem to change much in my desire to be female.  I think we are what we are, and the idea we are somehow slaves to our hormones is just a wild theory, and probably untrue for the majority of us MTF transsexuals

Just an opinion

[SusanK]

I've been curious ever since I heard about this before on a TG messageboard, a wild theory that maybe that the reason that many TS people transition later in life is because their testosterone levels went down as they aged, thus increasing their gender dysphoria since their higher testosterone levels earlier in life clouded the sense of their real gender identity.

Late transistioner are more likely to have waited, not because of hormones, but because of fear and reality. The times were signficantly different then and the fear or retaliation and losing everything was and often still is real. To understand you have to go back to those times and see what it was like. Only in the last decade or so has the situation improved to let them see what's possible, but now still facing trememdous loss and stress with their family, friends, careers, finances, etc.

I would tend to call the idea about hormones a wild theory, or worse, someone looking for a reason that doesn't exist. But that's my corollary theory.