confused with myself

[banshee81]

Hi all

i am in need of some help. I came out transgender over a year ago to my friends and family  after hiding it for over 20 odd years. the problem is  because i don't need to cross dress (am 6.7")and am happy just knowing that i am a girl in a mans body and have known  since i was a young tot.  people  are asking me now if am still trans. and its getting distressing  people just thinking i am attention seeking or trying to be different. I have had my ears pierced and am growing my hair to try and feminize my look a Little.

am getting more and more confused with myself with people saying "your not  trans were your dress"    and me having to give a explanation   that clothing don't make the person.

[shanetastic]

If you are seeking like a label to make people happy so they can understand you, you could try to classify yourself as androgyne.  I don't know if I'm spelling that right so sorry.  Either way, people should understand that even if you do classify as trans not all of them need to transition and have the strong desire that others have.  There is no norm to us, just like there is no norm to anything else in society I think.  There's variation and for your friends and family to make assumptions as to what "all" trans people do and go through is a little big ignorant.  You should try to inform them a little more as to your situation if they really care to know.

Anyways good luck and I hope I somewhat answered your question.  I'm not fully concentrated right now but  I hope it works! 

[BlueAndYellow]

Just don't listen what other people tell you! I mean, you are what you feel like, aren't you? There are boys that dress up very feminine and the other way round as well. There is nobody asking whether they are normal boys or not. You're an individual and you have the right to dress as you want to dress. That does not change who you are. As you already said, clothing does not make the person!
Tell people who are wondering who or 'what' you are... I can understand that people tend to get unsure when they cannot classify you. It is always the same...questions can mostly not being avoided I guess...just answer them, again and again. Stand up for yourself...

[Eva Marie]

Just don't listen what other people tell you! I mean, you are what you feel like, aren't you? There are boys that dress up very feminine and the other way round as well. There is nobody asking whether they are normal boys or not. You're an individual and you have the right to dress as you want to dress. That does not change who you are. As you already said, clothing does not make the person!
Tell people who are wondering who or 'what' you are... I can understand that people tend to get unsure when they cannot classify you. It is always the same...questions can mostly not being avoided I guess...just answer them, again and again. Stand up for yourself...

Exactly. There is no standard "trans" person. Just be true to yourself. You don't have to please anyone except yourself.

Also, come check out the androgyne forum. There are a lot of us there that feel similar to the way that you do.

[banshee81]

the last week or so I've been thing i might be bi gendered or Androgynous  but feel so much better with myself  when i am i "girl mode".  i do think i need to talk more about what going with me so i can start to understand myself better and be better able to explained to others who ask me about what i am,. its sad that people need labels for things to put everyone in boxes.

i will definitely come and check out the androgyne forum.

[Just Kate]

I will reply more later (just found this thread before bed), but I feel the exact same way as you do and often have the same difficulties with others.