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Those who are female and also not afraid of being transgendered

Started by Janet Merai, April 15, 2009, 01:48:34 AM

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Janet Merai

I know about ->-bleeped-<-s and cross-dressers, but I have begun noticing people will go so far as to blatantly SAY they are a transgender or transsexual just because they want to show it off... is it me or are people just trying to play with words or be who they are not?

I am not saying trans do NOT want to be the opposite gender, but it seems titles like these are taking a big tsunami wave and people think that having a title of transgender is who they are or transsexual and not actually their chosen gender... is it me or are we seeing a new trend?

That or am I just noticing this?

(Topic re-named)
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placeholdername

Quote from: Janet Merai on April 15, 2009, 01:48:34 AM
I know about ->-bleeped-<-s and cross-dressers, but I have begun noticing people will go so far as to blatantly SAY they are a transgender or transsexual just because they want to show it off... is it me or are people just trying to play with words or be who they are not?

I am not saying trans do NOT want to be the opposite gender, but it seems titles like these are taking a big tsunami wave and people think that having a title of transgender is who they are or transsexual and not actually their chosen gender... is it me or are we seeing a new trend?

That or am I just noticing this?


You're just notcing this.  Some people like to take pride in being trans -- I'm not really sure where I stand as far as that goes yet.
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Janet Merai

I know I am a transgender due to the term indicating my sex/gender is opposite from my mental sex/gender.

But when I envision myself as a female I do NOT see a transgender but a full female with everything there.
When someone asks me who I am, I am not going to say "transsexual" but "Janet Merai."

I just do not see why people go so much to say they are who they are not.

I know the title shows you are different but trans have been around since the early days and people still seem to enjoy using titles... odd lol

Right now I am a transgender and reflecting my status because I am not legally female as of yet so I use this title to show my progress.
But when I become post-op or anything beyond or behind, I will reflect that to show my status, but other than that, its like using Romaji in Japanese when you learn Hiragana/Katakana/Kanji, Romaji becomes useless just like a title becomes because you tie yourself to someone you are not.

I want to be known as Janet Merai and not a transsexual, just a woman :3
(Of course I will actually be a transsexual, but you get the point)
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placeholdername

Quote from: Janet Merai on April 15, 2009, 02:45:55 AM
I know I am a transgender due to the term indicating my sex/gender is opposite from my mental sex/gender.

But when I envision myself as a female I do NOT see a transgender but a full female with everything there.
When someone asks me who I am, I am not going to say "transsexual" but "Janet Merai."

I just do not see why people go so much to say they are who they are not.

I know the title shows you are different but trans have been around since the early days and people still seem to enjoy using titles... odd lol

Right now I am a transgender and reflecting my status because I am not legally female as of yet so I use this title to show my progress.
But when I become post-op or anything beyond or behind, I will reflect that to show my status, but other than that, its like using Romaji in Japanese when you learn Hiragana/Katakana/Kanji, Romaji becomes useless just like a title becomes because you tie yourself to someone you are not.

I want to be known as Janet Merai and not a transsexual, just a woman :3
(Of course I will actually be a transsexual, but you get the point)

A lot of people in our situation feel the same way as you do and let go of the trans label once they fully transition.  But not everyone, and I think it's good to have some people who are proud of what we go through because otherwise we would become invisible.
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Sophie90

Hmm, maybe some people want to reclaim the word transsexual, like gay.

If transsexuals are proud of being transsexuals, that could send a message to people still in the closet that it's okay to feel the way that they do.
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Miniar

Quote from: Blueflare on April 15, 2009, 06:10:02 AM
Hmm, maybe some people want to reclaim the word transsexual, like gay.

If transsexuals are proud of being transsexuals, that could send a message to people still in the closet that it's okay to feel the way that they do.

There's that (Which is, in my opinion, an extremely positive thing!), and then there's my position.

I was born a girl in the flesh.
No matter how many surgeries I have, how long I'm on hormones, how much time I spend as a man, I can never change the fact that I was born with a vagina instead of a penis.
There will be moments where I will have to explain the absence of natural testicles to my new doctor.
There will be moments where I will have to explain to a prospective lover that my equipment isn't "up to code".
I call myself Trans because I am, plain and simple.
I use the word because "I" need to come to terms with facts I can not change.
I use the word because it's the "right" word.

This doesn't mean I'll shake the hand of a newly met stranger and introduce myself as a transexual, but it means I won't hide from the word or pretend that my youth didn't happen.

Who we are today depends on the path we've walked. If we love ourselves now, we should take pride in all that has come before it, even (if not especially) the parts that were difficult or painful.



"Everyone who has ever built anywhere a new heaven first found the power thereto in his own hell" - Nietzsche
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K8

Quote from: Miniar on April 15, 2009, 08:18:32 AM
Who we are today depends on the path we've walked. If we love ourselves now, we should take pride in all that has come before it, even (if not especially) the parts that were difficult or painful.

The past forms us.  I am and always will be transgendered.  I can "fix" my body and my place in society, but I will still have been pretending to have been a man most of my life.  And people reacted to me as if I was a man.  Perhaps after I transition they will relate to me as a woman.  But most people ("normal" people, for want of a better word) will not have had this experience of being born in the wrong body, relating to the world in the wrong gender, struggling to make it right.  Therefore, I will always be transgendered.  It is what has formed me, just as my years in the military and my marriage and everything else has formed me.

Anyway, what's wrong with being transgendered?   ;)

- Kate
Life is a pilgrimage.
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Janet Merai

I think some of you have taken what I have said the wrong way :3

I am not against transgenders or transsexuals, all I meant to say was I noticed a trend that want to say they are transgender/transsexual just because they are and make that their gender instead of female/male.

Now I am not against ->-bleeped-<- or transsexualism but it was something I noticed.

I will always be a transgender up until I become a transsexual just like someone mentioned and it WILL be a part of my past, I just mentioned that I wanted to be known as a female despite my past... even if it will shock others I know the consequences.

Hopefully that clears things up :P
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Ashley315

some don't mind being labeled as a 3rd gender.  Nothing wrong with that. 
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Janet Merai

I do not mind being labeled a transgender or transsexual either, because in reality I will never be seen as a 100% real genetic female in the eyes of the law or other traditional people.

I wish I was female but I can live my life as if I were a female and be happy about it :3
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imaz

Quote from: Ashley315 on April 15, 2009, 03:27:42 PM
some don't mind being labeled as a 3rd gender.  Nothing wrong with that.

Indeed, it ain't a bad place to be.
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chrysalis

I think it's certainly possible that someone could, through denial find themselves fighting to be trans, more than as trans.
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Sandy

Would you be proud of being diabetic?

I've mentioned this before in other posts.  I am a woman.  I was born a woman, I have always been a woman and I will die as a woman.

I am proud of that.

I was born with a birth defect that went untreated for over half a century and very nearly killed me.  But I have had it corrected and I am glad to be alive.

I don't wear a sign around my neck proclaiming TRANSSEXUAL!!!  But neither do I deny it anymore than I would deny that I had diabetes.

I stand as a proud human being and to those trans people who are trying to deal with this "Blessing inside a curse" I try to be an example.

There are those who are "over the top".  And I daresay that there are those types in virtually every type of human endeavor.  But as a trend, I don't think so.  It may be that there is a bit more social exposure and acceptance which is a good thing.  But there are things like "RuPaul's Drag Race" which is by definition "over the top" and a bit in bad taste if you ask me.  It really doesn't advance the cause of trans people at all.  It is the equivalent of white actors doing blackface and saying that it was advancing the cause of racial understanding.

*Sandy steps off her soapbox*

Carry on...

-Sandy
Out of the darkness, into the light.
Following my bliss.
I am complete...
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Miniar

Quote from: Sandy on April 16, 2009, 07:56:20 AMWould you be proud of being diabetic?

If I were a diabetic and was able to manage my condition successfully and still live a life worth living, then the answer is a big, fat, YES!
Of course I would be proud.



"Everyone who has ever built anywhere a new heaven first found the power thereto in his own hell" - Nietzsche
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Sophie90

I don't think "proud" is the right word, as such, rather not ashamed.
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Stevie Stevens

Quote from: Blueflare on April 16, 2009, 09:14:17 AM
I don't think "proud" is the right word, as such, rather not ashamed.


I agree with Blueflare. I am not proud that I am transgendered. From a very early age, I never went out of my way to show that I am transgendered. The things that I have done as far as my dress and my actions were always just me being me. And as Blueflare says, I have never been ashamed that I am the way I am just as someone should never be ashamed because of their race, physical condition, etc.
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Mister

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Lyric

What this means is that thanks to the media and other public education making existence of transgendered people better known, some actually consider it something a characteristic worth flaunting. I believe this is a very good thing. I hope it means fewer young people will suffer self condemnation and confusion because they feel different.

This is a matter that we will always be at odds with each other about, though. Identity crisis is the reason this board exists. Each of us has doubtless had a few different concepts of our identities over the course of our lifetimes. And self-concept is very different between transsexuals, androgynes and the gender crossers.

I, personally, identify myself as transgendered and not female (or male). I came to this conclusion after many years of agonizing over the matter. Knowing what I am allows me to stop stressing and get on with my life.
"Your time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life." - Steve Jobs
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Ashley315

Female and male are biological terms that are based on chromosomes, so with that standard no one born male can  become female and vice versa with today's technology (maybe in 100 years they will be able to fix that).  No amount of hormones or surgery is going to change your DNA.

Case in point.  Lets say you were burned beyond total recognition, but they were able to pull a DNA sample from your corpse.  It wouldn't matter how much surgery you had had or how many years of hormones you had taken or even if you lived total stealth, they are going to say the corpse found was male or female based solely on what the DNA says.  They may do a little digging and later on discover you are transgendered and then label you as such.  (Though I'm not sure how they would label someone who is genetically intersexed.  I guess they would be confused)

Gender on the other hand, is fluid and full of many variances.  Anyone can claim to be of any gender they choose and if they present that way, most people in society will just go with it and accept things for face value.  There is no right or wrong way to be with gender.

My point is that it is all in the eye of the beholder.  Everyone has different views on who they are.  Personally, I view myself as a woman.  Granted, yes, I am a transwoman, but that makes me no more or no less than any other woman out there.  And everyone has the right to view themselves however they want to, but don't always expect everyone else to share your same view, but, if you are happy, then who cares what anyone else thinks anyway.
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