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Playing Devil's Advocate: What's so bad about "->-bleeped-<- ->-bleeped-<-s"?

Started by Jamie-o, May 07, 2009, 06:34:20 AM

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Arch

Quote from: Nichole on May 08, 2009, 10:45:35 AM
But, over the past few hundred years our culture also seems to have developed a "puritan"(?) goal that sees a sort of next world idealism as the perfect and regards anything material (except money and power) as a lesser station of being human.

I would say that Americans didn't develop that Puritan ethic in the last few hundred years; we started out with it. And most of us haven't yet learned how to escape it.
"The hammer is my penis." --Captain Hammer

"When all you have is a hammer . . ." --Anonymous carpenter
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tekla

And most of us haven't yet learned how to escape it.

I give lessons, seminars and field trips.
FIGHT APATHY!, or don't...
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Arch

"The hammer is my penis." --Captain Hammer

"When all you have is a hammer . . ." --Anonymous carpenter
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tekla

FIGHT APATHY!, or don't...
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NicholeW.

Quote from: Arch on May 08, 2009, 12:00:42 PM
I would say that Americans didn't develop that Puritan ethic in the last few hundred years; we started out with it. And most of us haven't yet learned how to escape it.

Like not quite 400 years yet, Arch? :) Massachusetts Bay, Puritans and some others, 1629; Plymouth, Levellers, 1620. We really haven't had more than the past few hundred years to develop anythin' here, have we? :)

But yes, that Puritan streak has been very pronounced from pretty much the beginning. But it has developed as it doesn't really look exactly like it did almost 400 years ago, does it? :)

N~
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Arch

Quote from: Nichole on May 08, 2009, 12:21:07 PM
Like not quite 400 years yet, Arch? :) Massachusetts Bay, Puritans and some others, 1629; Plymouth, Levellers, 1620. We really haven't had more than the past few hundred years to develop anythin' here, have we? :)

Not quite sure what you're getting at; I was just quoting you without quotation marks.

Bad habit, that. I berate my students for it all the time.  ::)
"The hammer is my penis." --Captain Hammer

"When all you have is a hammer . . ." --Anonymous carpenter
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NicholeW.

Quote from: Arch on May 08, 2009, 12:25:34 PM
Not quite sure what you're getting at; I was just quoting you without quotation marks.

Bad habit, that. I berate my students for it all the time.  ::)

Ah, that explains it. Quoting without using quotation marks. Or tekla's italics. Or the italics tekla employs? :) I was focused on Americans didn't develop that Puritan ethic in the last few hundred years.

Sorry, didn't get the quote without quotes. :)

Whatcha teach? Writing and grammar or history?
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tekla

I don't think they are exactly my italics - if they are, the English Language owes me big time, send the check to...

I just find them a bit more elegant in BB postings.
FIGHT APATHY!, or don't...
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NicholeW.

Quote from: tekla on May 08, 2009, 12:40:43 PM
I don't think they are exactly my italics - if they are, the English Language owes me big time, send the check to...

I just find them a bit more elegant in BB postings.

Corrected. :laugh:
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Arch

Quote from: Nichole on May 08, 2009, 12:36:43 PM
Whatcha teach? Writing and grammar or history?
Alas, writing, composition. I love it, but I do wish my students were a little more articulate. I guess we all do.

And directions. It would help if they could/would follow the freaking directions. But then they would actually have to read something.

Just call me Comp Cop.  :police:

Hmm. What happened to the ->-bleeped-<- ->-bleeped-<- discussion?
"The hammer is my penis." --Captain Hammer

"When all you have is a hammer . . ." --Anonymous carpenter
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tekla

I do wish my students were a little more articulate.

Ummm, isn't that your job to make them more articulate?  If they were all that smart, they would not need to be there in the first place, right?
FIGHT APATHY!, or don't...
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NicholeW.

Quote from: Arch on May 08, 2009, 12:57:26 PM
Alas, writing, composition. I love it, but I do wish my students were a little more articulate. I guess we all do.

And directions. It would help if they could/would follow the freaking directions. But then they would actually have to read something.

Just call me Comp Cop.  :police:

Hmm. What happened to the ->-bleeped-<- ->-bleeped-<- discussion?

I've done that and felt the same darned way! And that was in the mid-70s! Doesn't sound like it's changed much. But as tekla said, if they were as good as one hoped there'd be no need for graduate assistants now would there? :)

I think the three of us pretty well derailed the ->-bleeped-<- ->-bleeped-<- discussion for now and it was going soooo well. :) I'm sure someone will get it back on track.

N~
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Miniar

Being after a relationship simply for the sex does not an a-hole make, being dishonest and manipulative about it does.
If a person is open and honest about it, it doesn't matter if they're a ->-bleeped-<-, they're Good People.



"Everyone who has ever built anywhere a new heaven first found the power thereto in his own hell" - Nietzsche
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Arch

Quote from: tekla on May 08, 2009, 12:59:14 PM
Ummm, isn't that your job to make them more articulate?  If they were all that smart, they would not need to be there in the first place, right?

Actually, no, it's not my freaking job to MAKE them more articulate. It's their job to do the reading and follow directions and practice their writing and respond to my margin comments and take it upon themselves to learn key points of grammar and punctuation that they should know already and come in for help when they are floundering. They are adults. I'm not their babysitter. I can't come into their dorm rooms and say, "Now, this course requires you to prep for at least twelve hours a week outside of class. Are you doing your homework?" I can only help them when they first help themselves.

I should also point out that ten weeks is not a lot of time for anyone to become noticeably more articulate, that very many of my students still can't write a coherent paragraph to save their ailing grannies (isn't that a skill they should have learned by high school? The students, not the grannies), and that it doesn't help me when some of my predecessors show their incompetence and lack of rigor and standards when they make idiot remarks like, "Oh, I never give lower than a C" or "It's WHAT they say that matters, not how they say it" or "I don't like to make negative comments on student papers; I don't want to hurt their feelings." I'm always so glad to get the students that these colleagues have passed on to me.

I wholeheartedly agree that if the students were all perfect little writers, they wouldn't need to be there. And I would be out of a job. But their level of incompetence can be quite astounding. I once went to Barnes & Noble and found a little workbook of third-grade skills and knowledge about writing and grammar--very basic stuff. I tested my freshman and sophomore college students on some of this material. As a group, they failed miserably.

Nichole, I wish our grad students were better trained themselves. They are lit people, and many of them do not know writing basics. Many of them admit their ignorance, say things like, "I've never liked grammar," and then mutter something about maybe reviewing a grammar handbook at some point--they clearly see it as a chore, something to be put off indefinitely. And yet these are the folks who work in the writing lab and give my students lousy writing advice. If they don't know anything about parallel structure, preposition overuse, or comma splices, how can these grads competently advise my students on clarity and style and articulateness?

I know I was a freaky little kid. I've been nuts for grammar, style, usage, and vocab since I was very small. So I'm an unusual case. But seriously, how can people justify NOT knowing the very thing they've been hired to teach? It boggles my mind.

I don't think things are getting worse, by the way. Writing well is hard work for most people. I have every reason to believe that comp teachers have been in the same boat for at least the last sixty-five years. It would just be nice to have more students who follow basic directions and actually look up a key word that they don't know and take seriously my contention (shown to be accurate again and again) that once they produce a draft, the work has just started. Stuff like that.

And now back to the topic at hand: which spelling should we use, "->-bleeped-<-" or "->-bleeped-<-"? I prefer the former, myself.
"The hammer is my penis." --Captain Hammer

"When all you have is a hammer . . ." --Anonymous carpenter
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Annwyn

->-bleeped-<- ->-bleeped-<-s present the greatest dating opportunity available to pre-ops.

Who cares if they're doing it because they want a chick with a dick.  They still have a heart, and many if not most are looking for a competent partner as much as they're looking to play out their favorite porno in their own bedroom.

I've happily put up some rather enticing pics on ->-bleeped-<-->-bleeped-<- websites.  Apparently South Carolina is rather void of people attracted to that sort of thing, either that or my abrasive attitude counters my attempts at interwebz seduction.
However, the first thing I ask all my suitors is, "what difference is so significant between a biowoman and a transwoman that you would seek one out by subscribing to a dating site exclusively for transwomen."  The ones who beat around the bush and can't just say they're friggin gay and want an excusable boyfriend get ignored.  I'm not going to date anyone who doesn't have a strong image of me as a woman in his/her mind.
Some just say that transwomen have a tendency to exhibit stronger female attributes than the masculinized women of the 21st century.  They just appreciate a woman who ENJOYS wearing a dress, as opposed to jeans and burger chicks.  I, personally, can agree with that and appreciate that.
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Arch

I do have my own hangups about my lower anatomy right now--something to work through in therapy. But anyone who is attracted to me BECAUSE of my, er, front hole--or because s/he thinks or hopes I have a front hole--is not someone I would want to get involved with.

But that's just me.
"The hammer is my penis." --Captain Hammer

"When all you have is a hammer . . ." --Anonymous carpenter
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Just Kate

I apologize ahead of time for not reading most of the thread past the initial post, but I have strong feelings on this:

Objectification is the problem.  These men see us as objects, not as people.  They don't want a person, they want a sex toy.  If I am an object, it means I'm not human.  It means to that person, my feelings and desires aren't worthwhile and most likely don't count - and if they do at all, not nearly as much as his counts.  Once a person is an object in the eyes of another, there can be no relationship, there can be no love, there can be nothing but (ab)use.

Quickly let me say that I don't know that everyone who qualifies as a "->-bleeped-<-" fits my above description, but I'm generally skeptical of anyone who seeks after someone for any particular external characteristic.
Ill no longer be defined by my condition. From now on, I'm just, Kate.

http://autumnrain80.blogspot.com
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Vexing

Quote from: Janet Lynn on May 07, 2009, 09:28:29 AM
I am on a couple of sites for TS/TG, and most are looking for relationships based on sex
...
Face it, that is what bioguys want.

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Just Kate

Ok, adding more... might add even more as I read responses.

The other problem with ->-bleeped-<- ->-bleeped-<-s has more to do with those who WANT to be chased or rather those most susceptible to their ploys.  To the new TS, the inexperienced,  just beginning transsexual who has what seems to be the world against them, the ->-bleeped-<- ->-bleeped-<- can seem like their best friend!  They give them muuuch desired validation of their femaleness and more than probably anyone else.  This addicts or at least strongly attracts the insecure TS to the ->-bleeped-<-, leading to an unhealthy relationship based upon a need of validation rather than true understanding, friendship and a desire for one another's wellbeing. 

I saw this happen over and over again.  The ->-bleeped-<-'s obviously sexually motivated comments form the basis of the confidence of the new TS only to have them crushed when either A) reality sets in, or B) the ->-bleeped-<- moves on.  You must transition for yourself, and you must build your own confidence and self assurity - it cannot be based upon the feelings and expectations of others or you will fail.
Ill no longer be defined by my condition. From now on, I'm just, Kate.

http://autumnrain80.blogspot.com
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Jamie-o

Quote from: Ceri on May 08, 2009, 10:23:24 AM
If their category desire feeds into a good and healthy respect for you as an individual, then it's a kink that's OK. If it takes away from you and your specific existence, not so much.

Nicely put.  :eusa_clap:

Quote from: interalia on May 09, 2009, 01:55:14 AM
You must transition for yourself, and you must build your own confidence and self assurity - it cannot be based upon the feelings and expectations of others or you will fail.

Also an excellent point.   :icon_yes:
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