The bid bay window

[Barbara]

It was night in the dead of winter.It was one of the worst winters here.It was snowing hard,the snow was piling up outside the the big bay window.I was alone.I was here for a reason.this was the night i wanted to figure it all out.I had 3 six packs of miller high life,and a half bottle of jack daniels and 2 _________.I was also dressed.Why do i do this?.why do i like to feel like a girl?
Am i gay,do i want to have the sex change?
As the night continued i just got  drunk and high.I never figured it out in the terms that i wanted.I know i am a transvestite.that goes without saying.if later on, i want to change my sex, or if i realize that i am gay then i am going to go for it,I know my life is to short to sit and try to rationalize everything