This would be a whole lot easier if_______?

[Elizabeth]

Hi everyone,

Let's play the "what if" game.  Tell us what it is that would make being transsexual or transgendered easier for you to deal with, live with or cope with.   I will start.

This would be  whole lot easier for me if I were attracted to men.  There is so much information and misinformation out there that suggests or just plain says that "true transsexuals"  are attracted to same birth sex, making them heterosexual after transistion.  Because I am attracted to women and a transsexual it is really difficult to accept I am both transsexual and homosexual, but that is precisely how I feel.

Add to that, there is not agreement among the mental health community or even within our own community and it leaves one feeling confused and isolated.  I know we all have our crosses to bear, but sometimes it is a lot.

Love always,
Elizabeth

[Buffy]

If I had a laptop (or computer) 30 years ago.....

If the internet had existed then......

If I could have found a resources like Susan's in the late 70's....

If I would have stopped denying my feelings when I was 18.....

If I could have kept my family intact ( I really do miss my sons)

Becky

[cindianna_jones]

This would be a whole lot easier if I had twice as much life to deal with this! I am getting old too fast!

But seriously, it becomes a whole lot easier when you finally resolve the conflict. Once that is done, the road is open.  You see where to go.  You know what to do. 

The easy part is doing.  The hardest part is knowing why.

Cindi

[Melissa]

Being transsexual would be easier if I had a million dollars.

Melissa

[tinkerbell]

Everything would have been easier if I had transitioned during my teens...


tinkerbell

[LynnER]

It would be so much easyer if....... my parrents could have understood and accepted, and maby even helped when they first caught me.... or even realized when I was a young child.....

It would be so much easyer if I wasnt so confused... this whole thing of starting to like guys is really getting under my skin and I dont need that.... but I do need a compainon/so.....

It would be SO MUCH EASYER if my ex fience wasnt my ex fience and we were still together  *Crys*

[Chaunte]

This would be a whole lot easier if it wasn't so rare!

This would be a whole lot easier if we didn't scare the bejeebers out of the world!

This would be a whole lot easier if I could lose half my mass!

Chaunte

[Sheila]

This would be a whole lot easier if I was a lot youngrer when I transitioned. Then again I wouldn't have met my wife and have had the best friend a girl could ever want.  Sometimes I don't like to play the what if games as I do have it good now, but would have liked not to have the T going through my veins all these years. I'm so big boned that nothing fits right. Oh well, life is too short to worry about such trivial things anyway. I love my life now and I have a good 20 years left, hopefully.
Sheila

[umop ap!sdn]

Everything would have been easier if I had transitioned during my teens...

I agree. If I could have done one thing differently, that would probably be it.

I'm terribly envious of those who did.

[Melissa]

Everything would have been easier if I had transitioned during my teens...

I agree. If I could have done one thing differently, that would probably be it.

I disagree with the "everything" part.

Melissa

[tinkerbell]

Everything would have been easier if I had transitioned during my teens...

I agree. If I could have done one thing differently, that would probably be it.

I disagree with the "everything" part.

Melissa

For me, it would have been.

tinkerbell

[Melissa]

For me, it would have been.

tinkerbell

Really?  Could you have afforded HRT if you transitioned at 16?  Were your parents completely supportive?  What about transitioning in a hostile school environment?  What year was it when you were 16?  I thought being a transsexual was more frowned upon then.

Melissa

[cindianna_jones]

Hey, I could have made the money to pay for surgery at 16! 

It wasn't out of the realm of possibility.

Even when I did get it, I only had to come up with $7500.

Cindi

[tinkerbell]

Hey, I could have made the money to pay for surgery at 16! 

It wasn't out of the realm of possibility.

Even when I did get it, I only had to come up with $7500.

Cindi

true!  very true!

tinkerbell

[umop ap!sdn]

I think my parents could have afforded to get me HRT at 16. It was the '90s for what that's worth. No, I don't suppose they could have payed for me to have SRS. But it would have been easier for me if they could.

[Melissa]

Well, I might say it would be easier if I transitioned at 18 AND had supportive parents.

Melissa

[DawnL]

...I'd been born female.  Yeah, I know, too obvious.

There is no good answer in my case.  I wouldn't want to send my children back.  I have a granddaughter I adore.  I would never have met the woman who is the love of my life, even though things have turned a bit strange for us. 

So my best answer:

...I didn't have to deal with intolerant ignorant people.

Dawn

[Julie Marie]

Life would be a whole lot easier if today's society had adopted the beliefs of the Native Americans.  Back then we were called Berdache and Two Spirit.  They believed our presence in their tribes was a blessing from the Gods.  They recognized we could relate to both male and female alike.  It was considered a gift.  We were often healers, counselors, tribal chiefs and held other places of respect and honor. 

Being accepted and respected for who I am, not how I look, that's all I ask for.

Being a Two Spirit back then, I wonder if I'd be seeking physical change like I am now.  Something tells me no.

[HelenW]

... if people, and parents especially, would be less ignorant about what this is and what it's all about and therefore be able to accept me/us as a legitimate part of humanity.

Government funded SRS (a la Netherlands) might be nice to!

helen

[BrandiOK]

I thought about this one for awhile and I wanted to say that things would have been easier if I had started this as a teen instead of keeping it bottled up inside me but....I realized that I had no support network back then...I had no understanding of what I was feeling...I had nothing but anger, sadness and a lot of confusion. 

So....as it stands now, "This would be a whole lot easier if" --- My mother would accept me.  I try so very hard to push it out of my mind but, the truth is, her refusal to accept or even talk to me has been the one thing that tears at any hope of happiness I may ever find..