Getitng Ma'amed Without Getting Glammed

[Julie Marie]

I walked out of the house today putting practically no effort into looking girly.  I was ready for some funny looks.  Instead I got ma'amed where ever I went.

Go figure!

Julie

[FairyGirl]

It's very nice when that happens. I got ma'amed by a state trooper the other day at a routine drivers license checkpoint while I was in bluejeans, t-shirt, and no makeup. Funny thing was my license still has the "M" marker, so there's another go figure. Thank you, ma'am! 

[V M]

I get Ma'amed fairly regularly. It does feel good  Although I didn't take to it well when I was younger. But now in my forties....I'll take any compliment I can get 

[Ms.Behavin]

I was at kaiser medical today, standing in line with a lady in front and behind.  One of the nurses said ma'am, and the lady in front of me said which of the three woman was she referring to, her, myself and the lady behind me. 

Then I go see the doctor, my first time with list doctor, BTW and she starts asking when was the last time I had a pap smear.  Since she's going to be my primary care doctor,  I told her about my hum checkered past.  She just said OH, and kept on going.

That made my day.  Life just gets better and better.

Beni

[Tammy Hope]

the first time I get a Ma'am I'll probably leap into the air and make a fool of myself. I really notice it now (with sadness) when someone says "sir"

[Buffy]

I recently umpired in an international little league baseball tournament (9 games in 4 days).

For my sins I was given home plate umpire for the Minors (under 10's) Final and damn are those catchers small (aka bad back) and the pitching fairly erratic.

So there I was, leg guards, chest protecter and face mask, when a little American boy strolls out to the plate, takes a practice swing and looks at me and says "Hey, are you a boy or a girl!". I called time, pushed up my face mask and replied " I am the umpire, now shut up and hit", startled he said back "Ohhh Sorry Maam" and proceded to strike out.

Not much chance to umpire in a skirt and high heels.

Buffy

[Janet_Girl]

I am "Ma am"d all the time now, but once in a while I get that dreaded 'sir'.  I look at the person. point at my boobs and say "Excuse Me?".  They usually are at a lose for words at this time.  I fume over it for hours.  That so PO's me.

[Alyssa M.]

I always say I want to be able to walk into an auto parts store with no makeup, my hands and face smeared with grease, my hair pulled back into a pony tail, wearing a ratty white T-shirt, Levi's, and workboots, and have the guy at the register say, "How can I help you, Ma'am?" I've got a long way to go.

Buffy, that's just hilarious. I laughed. At least the kid knew what to say.

[DarkLady]

Too young to be Ma'amed and in different culture with different words. Young women seem to be now even less formal and and otherside men are less rude. 

[xsocialworker]

1) Kaiser medical has an upper echelon administrator who is M/F.

2) I have had talks with local police and I know some of them already know enough about this that if you are presenting as female, they will treat you as such even with an "M' on your license. I am referring to auto accidents or tickets where there is no possibilty they might have to cart you in. In jail, it becomes different. I was in 2 accidents since 2001 and I told the officers that my ID did not match my identity and the response was " no problem" and it was forgotten. I guess Florida is just like way progressive?

3) I did a training at a local jail on transgender health and there were no pronoun mistakes and I was directed to the female bathroom. Unfortunately, it was not the same if you didn't come in the front way.

4

[Suzy]

I walked out of the house today putting practically no effort into looking girly.  I was ready for some funny looks.  Instead I got ma'amed where ever I went.

Go figure!

Julie

Miss Julie, please tell me you aren't serious.  You are surprised by this?  And you get on me sometimes for having doubts??  Girl, you could not pass as man if you wanted to, as we both know that.  I mean, look who looked great practically right after surgery.  Remember this?



Put on your big girl panties and get out there and enjoy! 

Love ya,

Kristi

[Sandy]

Julie!

You stopped being able to pass as a guy a long time ago!  Sorry, hon, it just won't happen...

I'm glad you are coming to see this for yourself.

Congratulations!

-Sandy

[NicholeW.]

... Our police claims that using birtsex as classifying post-op TS is done ''because they do so in the USA''.

What you, and if what you write as true, is true, then I find that you and Finnish cops have a hard time understanding "in the USA."

There are thousands, hundreds of thousands jusrisdictions here who employ possibly a (few) million enforcement officers. I don't think that there is a "rule" that applies to all of those cops, in any jurisdiction.

I presume that some places there will be cops who would behave the way the cops mentioned by XSW and in that same jurisdiction there are cops who would make a large deal out of the fact.

You seem to be making blanket presumptions that there are "rigid" rules to how cops here are going to treat someone dependant on where those officers work. It's never been my experience in any place I have ever lived that cops all behave the same way in the same circumstances: for traffic violations and prolly not for other things as well, provided of course, their lives aren't being somehow threatened.

As for the MTF thingy that you obsess about, I have had friends who have been stopped in TN, where the laws themselves are "unaccepting" (even legally toward post-ops) and have been treated respectfully and as "no big deal" whereas I know others who have been stopped in NJ, where the law states that there will be no discrimination of any sort, and have been treated as if they are 9/11 terrorists who pose a grave danger to the community simply by being alive.

I think that for the most part that is prolly true everywhere you go here. Although one would have to acknowledge that dealings with the cops in SF is likelier to be pacific than would the exact same dealing in  Cheyenne, WY, or Topeka, KS, or Jackson, MS.

I think the thing for you to do is to get out of your head 1) that the USA runs on a one-size fits all basis when it comes to cops and their actions and emotional make-ups and that 2) even if that was true that you have no stake in it since you have no plans to ever be here as a citizen and that even if you did that you are now post-op, and so, most of this is completeky moot for you.

N~

[FairyGirl]

thank you Nichole that was well said. 

[NicholeW.]

thank you Nichole that was well said. 

You're welcome, FG.

The single strain on that harp begins to grate after about the three-hundred and eighth time I've heard it played.

N~

[NicholeW.]

One attorney whom I asked said that county jails are more ''without general rules'' but state's prison systems and expectionally the federal system usually have some (secret) policy to classify TG:s.

OK, you've quoted this "one attorney" more than once. We get that you are obsessed by USA jails and prisons. You will drop this discussion element in a thread that has nothing at all to do with jail or prison, please?

It is a persistent and disturbing derailment that you are always using and the places you generally use it are almost always totally NOT about that idea. Please cut it out, DL.

N~

[V M]

  Went to buy some long garden stakes for my Sunflowers today. As I left the cashier said "Thank you Ma'am" 

[Michelle.]

I walked out of the house today putting practically no effort into looking girly.  I was ready for some funny looks.  Instead I got ma'amed where ever I went.

Go figure!

Julie

This is my future definition of blending/passing, whichever you choose to call the term.

Congrats Julie,

Mich'

[K8]

When I got my name-change papers, I went to the nearby military base to get a new ID.  (I'm retired military.)  The gate guard wasn't going to let me on because my ID at that time had a male name and a picture of me with a beard.  I explained that I needed to go to the ID office to get a new one because I had changed my name.  He said: Just go up this road and turn left at <something-or-other> road, Ma'am. 

Good thing I had my seatbelt on or I would have floated up through the sunroof.

- Kate

[Kyla]

It's very nice when that happens. I got ma'amed by a state trooper the other day at a routine drivers license checkpoint while I was in bluejeans, t-shirt, and no makeup. Funny thing was my license still has the "M" marker, so there's another go figure. Thank you, ma'am! 

I read an article a while ago that had something to do with police officers and transsexuals. It mentioned that some cops go under sensitivity training in regards to the transgendered community. However, I noticed in the article that they mentioned very few under go this training.

I highly doubt this was what happened in your case, given the fact that only two or three stations had underwent this training. Your story just reminded me of that article; I wish I had a link.

Regardless, I imagine it always feels good to be identified as the correct gender.