What are the pros & cons of changing your gender marker?

[pong]

Hello,

Based on your experiences, can you tell me what are the pros & cons of changing your gender marker? My therapist said I don't have to change it if I don't want to even after top surgery & testosterone... I know there will be tons of paperworks i.e, health insurance, life insurance etc.  but not changing your gender marker after you transition is defeating the purpose, isn't it?

Thanks... 

[lisagurl]

The cons is it is work. The pros is it is the honest thing to do.

[Janet_Girl]

No more so than when I changed my name.  And the only real one that counts, for me at least, is with the SSA.  Work, health care, insurance and even the banks have me as female.  And most just disregard the infamous letter from the SSA as "Oh Well", and that is that.

Janet

[sneakersjay]

Pros: to avoid having to explain yourself every time someone wants to see some ID.  It validates your identity.

Cons: insurance may deny claims (ie hysto for ftms) because you're legally male; may deny prostate exams for transwomen because ladies dont' have prostates - that sort of thing.

For most of us it's kind of a rite of passage.  If you're more androgyne maybe your gender marker doesn't matter as much.

Jay

[pong]

Pros: to avoid having to explain yourself every time someone wants to see some ID.  It validates your identity.

Cons: insurance may deny claims (ie hysto for ftms) because you're legally male; may deny prostate exams for transwomen because ladies dont' have prostates - that sort of thing.

For most of us it's kind of a rite of passage.  If you're more androgyne maybe your gender marker doesn't matter as much.

Jay

The thing with hysto is that they won't cover it even if your gender marker is female unless there's something wrong (i.e., cancer, fibroid etc.) but if your gender marker is male, and you haven't had hysto yet they will probably deny coverage for pap smear (which i think is recommended or is it required?) if you are getting T.

How about Life/Term Insurance? Did you have a problem changing your gender marker? or even car insurance? Is your rate going to be higher or lower based on your gender marker?   

Although I don't want to explain why I look and sound like a man but have an "F" on my passport everytime I travel and yes, it is a rite of passage.

[Mister]

You can get a hysterectomy covered by insurance w/o cancer or some other major problem.  I got mine covered by saying I wanted it out from having been on T for a while and to get bottom surgery.

There is really no reason to not change your gender marker.  i can't imagine why you'd go through transition to want to be female on all your documentation.  you'd have to out yourself at every job, ever border crossing (and there are many places i'd rather not travel as a bearded woman)...  it'd create all sorts of problems to have your appearance and your documentation inconsistent.  why your therapist would even suggest remaining legally female just baffles me.

[sneakersjay]

You can tell your gyno you have wicked cramps and heavy bleeding.  How are they going to know if it's true or not?  IMO the monthly curse was horrid and emotionally traumatic.  Putting it into  lingo the doc can understand may help them agree to hysto. 

I was just lucky I was an old fart with fibroids and heavy bleeding and cramps.  But I was never asked to prove the pain or bleeding.

And I had no issues with my life insurance or auto insurance.  Just called them up to change the name, and the woman asked, do you want me to change the gender marker also?  I said yes, and my rates didn't increase.  I thought the life insurance would, but it didn't.  I'm old enough for it not to affect car insurance, I suppose.

Jay

[pong]

My sentiment exactly. Why would I go through all the trouble of changing my name, having surgery & T and still be legally female on my documentation? The therapist position is that the gender marker doesn't affect anyone outside of myself so if I'm not affected by it I don't have to change it but then I guess I am.   

Mister, Did your insurance covered your hysto even if your gender marker was male or did you change your gender marker after you had the hysto?

Jay, did you have to send your insurance court order for the name change & surgeon's letter for the gender marker or did they just change it over the phone?

Anyway, thank you very much. I appreciate your help.

[sneakersjay]

Insurance changed everything over the phone, no documentation.  I can't recall though if they had me fax proof over or not.  Seems like I did it with just a phone call.  Some places wanted faxes, some originals (mostly bank related stuff or legal stuff).  Just call them and ask what proof they need.

Jay

[Mister]

I changed it post-hysto.

[pong]

I changed it post-hysto.

So can I change my gender marker on my DL, Passport & SSN without changing my health insurance (and I guess, my work record too) until I get my hysto? 
Post Merge: July 01, 2009, 10:28:30 PM

Insurance changed everything over the phone, no documentation.  I can't recall though if they had me fax proof over or not.  Seems like I did it with just a phone call.  Some places wanted faxes, some originals (mostly bank related stuff or legal stuff).  Just call them and ask what proof they need.

Jay

Thanks for the info Jay!

[sneakersjay]

So can I change my gender marker on my DL, Passport & SSN without changing my health insurance (and I guess, my work record too) until I get my hysto? 

Driver's license only but it depends on the state.  Mine you just need a therapist's letter (specifically worded) which I took along with my name change.

Passport requires top surgery (with a vaguely worded surgeon's letter).  Hysto is not required but may be in some states; not required by the feds that I know of.

I had a hysto because I knew I could get it covered, as I am older and had fibroids, and I played up the cramps and bleeding aspects.  Actually my doc had mentioned it as an option 4 yrs ago but at the time I wasn't even considering transition and was dating and operating under the 'don't fix it if it ain't broke' even though the monthly curse aggravated me no end.  When I decided to transition I was all over that option.  That doc did not know about my intent to transition and I had to listen to the HRT (ie estrogen) lecture a couple of times.  I finally told him my endo had that covered.

Jay

[Mister]

DL varies by state.  US federal gov't requires that your "sexual reassignment has been completed."

[pong]

Sorry if I wasn't clear on my question but let say I am able to change my gender marker on all my documentation (DL, passport & SSN) - my question is, is it OK if I keep my work record & health insurance as female just until I get my hysto? or is that going to be a problem?

BTW, I am from NJ and gender marker can now be change prior to surgery as long as your doctor/therapist signs a form called "Declaration of Gender Designation Change"